Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

Recommended Posts

I think I am really afraid of success and from having others expect a lot from me. I think it has to do with my role in my family. As the youngest I was always seen as less successful and less responsible than my siblings. Anyhow, I often wonder if I'm sabotaging myself. For example, if a job ipays well or requires a lot of responsibility, I won't apply for it. It's almost like I fear having others expect a lot of me. I feel that I have a long history of underachieving.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

First thing that comes to mind is to ask whether you are in therapy.I think therapy really helps with problems such as these. Where you can talk about the reasons WHY you have this fear or belief and work on ways of overcoming it if it's irrational.

Sometimes my mind gets the better of me as well, thinking stuff like "I'm not good enough" or "I could never do that", but why not?

Try to think more positively and find out what you ARE good at and what you would like to achieve. Work on goals that you want to reach and work your way up to success slowly. It has to be done step by step, and I'm sure you'll feel a lot more confident when you really are seeing yourself start to achieve even small things, it helps your self esteem as well.

That's my advice.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I truly despise that whole concept of someone being "afraid of success". As if everyone should naturally want to achieve great things. Or that being low-key or uninterested in big success is somehow unnatural. So, you don't want a job with a lot of responsibilities? Is that bad? Maybe you simply know yourself better than anyone else? You know your limits. Work within those limits and you'll do just fine.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i agree with both AJ and TD- i think it is something to work through in therapy, because we should never be afraid to do our best, yet we may have been been born a certain way. whether it is social, such as with your family raising you a certain way, or biological, such as people who have mental constraints, sometimes people just aren't CEO material. that doesn't mean that you can't succeed in what you choose to do or be happy, just that you're not going to be happy being CEO, because responsibility makes you take a step back. that's just how you are perhaps.

i have various MI issues that mean I'll never be the CEO either. i just can't handle stress and responsibility. i've been through that and failed miserably. i've learned my limits.

that is NOT to discourage you, that is NOT to say that you'll never be able to do whatever it is you want. that is only to say that for right nwo, you've been put in this position.

make the most of it! be the leader in what you do! you don't have to be the jet setter to kick some rear!

loon

ps- my dad was "only" a mechanic, but he kicked rear. he was the best master mechanic there was. i'd never trust anyone else to work on my car, to entrust my safety to them. when he died i was at a total loss and started having his best friend work on my car, and i still don't feel as safe. be the star in whatever you choose to do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

See, I am the oldest child, and I am often afraid t try things for the same reason, in case I fail, I'm also a perfectionist. I think the only way to get over it is to do 'safe' experiments, take little risks to prove to yourself that you can handle new stuff, and that even if you make a mistake, the world won't cave in.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...