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I wish i was back on ssris


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High, im new hear. I don't have bipolar but am on zyprexa 5mg. I ranout coz i took too many and lost my script. Im on them probly coz i went on antidepr3ssants last year and whent a little to the maniac side of things. I was the best i ever was creating lotso music and started a business selling cd's, i could talk my way into anything. The downside was i was a bit dangerous geting into fights for thrills and had episodes were i was laughing and crying and laughing then crying. Im my normal self on zyprexa but i wish i was back on ssris i miss the mania (or hypomania) does anyone relate

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Hi mrnat, and welcome!

Um....honey, if you've been manic or hypomanic, then you do have a flavour of bipolar. It's part of the definition.

I can totally relate to missing the hypomania. I love how I feel when I'm hypomanic: I have so much confidence, I feel sexy and fun to be around, I have tons of energy and no obstacle is insurmountable. *sigh* But then, like you, I remember the down side of it too: going out every night partying, drinking loads, smoking like a chimney, having unsafe sex with strangers, spending money I don't have, getting that restless feeling that makes me want to just run out on my life.... It's remembering the bad stuff that goes with the good that stops me trying to induce hypomania in myself. Oh, plus, remembering how godawful it was after I was brought down from a full mania (prozac-induced) and looking at the wreckage of my life and wondering how the hell to put it back together again. That wasn't fun.

xx

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