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Worried about posting here


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But I have a genuine question, and I don't want to google it.

My boyfriend confessed to me before we got together that he had a speed habit three and a half years ago. I got the impression that he went from using it at parties to using it daily, and he said that it really messed him up for a while, then he quit. He has no mental health problems, and says that he does not use it at all now, he doesn't use any other drugs and barely even drinks. He doesn't give off any noticeable signs of being under the influence, I haven't seen his friends use it, and to be honest, he doesn't go out partying like he used to. I'm pretty convinced that he is being truthful with me.

My worry really is about how he used. I didn't ask at the time because I don't know very much about how to take speed, not having done it myself. I've read up and most of the methods seem okay, but needles got mentioned. I'm concerned about needle usage what with Hepatitis and HIV and stuff like that being sexually transmitted, though he says that he has given blood recently so will have been tested for stuff like that, I assume. He doesn't appear to have any track marks, but I suppose I am really asking, would a needle user automatically have track marks, or do you have to have a long term serious injecting habit to have them?

I do trust him, but this relationship is fairly new. I will get to asking him directly, because I am sure that I can and not upset him, but it would just help me to know a bit about this stuff, because I have no background in drugs whatsoever and am clueless.

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But I have a genuine question, and I don't want to google it.

My boyfriend confessed to me before we got together that he had a speed habit three and a half years ago. I do trust him, but this relationship is fairly new. I will get to asking him directly, because I am sure that I can and not upset him, but it would just help me to know a bit about this stuff, because I have no background in drugs whatsoever and am clueless.

I took that some years ago, not on reg basis, but enough to get cranky. Not a big deal at all to quit, we used to snort it up, it just made me talkative and high and beat up the next day. All in all it was nothing to me, I didn't like it as it confused my thinking too much.

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Karuna, I know that when you give blood here, they screen it for HIV, hepatitis and all sorts of stuff. (I give regularly, so I'm pretty familiar with the procedure).

You could reassure yourself indirectly by accompanying him to a blood drive, seeing that he actually gives blood, and knowing that the blood drive sponsors will be in touch if there's anything wrong with the blood.

On the other hand, you could ask him directly if he used needles. If he did, then he should voluntarily get tested for various diseases before you two become intimate.

The other thing the Red Cross always asks me is if I've had tattoos. That's a source for Hepatitis, as well.

I think you're smart to check out all this stuff. If I were about to have sex with a new partner, I would require a blood test. I'm an old fart, but I don't want herpes or HIV or Hepatitis.

olga

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Track marks are only long lasting if you use alot or, if the needles are dirty. Then the dirtyness on the needles will act like indian ink and "tatoo" a track mark on you. I have track marks. I think they mainly came from intense usage but, there were many times when I had used the same needle. So, if he was very clean while shooting, then it may never show up.

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I had a talk with him about it all, and he has reassured me. I talked to my uncle, who is a drugs worker, just to get the heads up on what I need to be aware of. I am extremely careful about safe sex what with being depakote anyway.

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i would ask him to do an STD test including AIDS before you'll sleep with him. i have done it. people have done it to me. most people don't mind doing it, because if they give a damn about you, they'll want you to know for sure.

;)

abi

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Sounds like your b/f, even though he's had his indiscretions, is a good and honest guy. I doubt he'd throw a hissy fit if you ask him if he's used needles to inject meth before. And that if he answers yes, I doubt he'll leave you for asking to have him do HIV/HCV tests. Hell, he might have had them done already, and won't mention it until you ask.

Another idea (I learned this in sex ed many moons ago) is to suggest that you both get tested. IMO you could still be clear with him that needles are the reason you want him tested, but I understand it really does help the partner when the other agrees to go too (even if you have no good reason to get tested). That said, HCV has a high latent prevalence in the general population, so may as well get tested for it anyways.

My personal experience is that having had a blood transfusion in 1984 (before blood bank HIV and HCV screening started), that having HIV and HCV tests done last year (n.B. - they were both negative, fortunately) did give me peace of mind.

So best of luck to both of you.

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I've been tested recently for all STD's, and come out all clear. I would go again if I had to, but as someone who has been sexually abused, lying around with my feet in stirrups with a stranger fiddles about down there is never a fun experience for me, so if I can avoid doing it more than I have to, I will.

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my dad used to cook meth (my dad is dead now) and my ex step bitch was his best customer. all i ever saw was it being snorted, no needles were ever used. that isn't to say it can't be done that way, i think it can be smoked, snorted, or injected, but i think the preferred method is snorting, like coke.

i'd be concerned about his future addiction potential. will he go back to using with a slight provocation? a major one? has he gotten counseling for it?

i'm with abi. if he gives a shit he'll pony up for testing. at the blood bank, they take your blood and at least at the red cross, never tell you if they use it or not. so that isn't a reliable way to do testing. you have to get the blood test.

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Hi-a Karuna I'm worried about posting here, too,

1. STDs fucking show up when they are good and ready, so just cuz I test clear doesn't mean I am clear

2. I guess your "pal" never injected cuz you can't have injected and still give blood?

Good luck

Susan(lynn)

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Hiya

Just to throw a spin on things.....

I use to work in the sex industry and was amazed at how many men - who were high powered business men on the whole - would pay for sex without a condom - and that includes oral! If the girl/guy is prepared to have unprotected sex of any kind with one person then they will have done it in the past and quite probably in the future.

I was sexually abused as a child and raped in my teens and early 20s - no condoms were used. When I worked - I was in my early 30s - I was a stickler for protected sex including oral - which most people forget, as contraception is still viewed firstly as a means not to get pregnant. We - in the Western world - are lucky enough to have the choice to practice safe sex and can ususally get condoms for free - Africa AIDS not so lucky. I get really angry when people have unsafe sex - yes I can understand mistakes being made - I did on occasion when I was young and got carried away in the moment. But I'm talking about people who practice unsafe sex regularly.

I know alot of people have ideas on the type of person they view seeing working girls or guys. I worked in several places and most of the guys were suited and booted and were quite happily married. So although someone who has used needles, tatoos or reckless sexual behaviour is a higher risk category there are an awful lot of so called "normal" people who practice unsafe sex. In fact HIV and other STD's has been increasing in heterosexual relationships because people are not being safe.

So when you have sex with someone who are you actually going to bed with?

You mentioned that you'd been sexually abused and was wondering if you have told your BF about that - if its appropriate? There are lots of things you can do to help build up trust - which I think is far more inportant at the beginning especially if you've had your boundaries violated - without having sex such as stroking, cuddling, massages and of course communicating!!!

I think getting tested is just the practical side of things now days and it helps if you go together for support and respect for the other person - "I have asked you to get tested and so will I" It's not that pleasant for guys either; and although I regularly go for check ups I hate it!!! One time I was asked would I mind if a couple of students came in too.... "Believe it or not Doc, I don't really want the world staring down my vagina today!!!"

Anyway wishing you well!!!

Hawk

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I've been tested recently for all STD's, and come out all clear. I would go again if I had to, but as someone who has been sexually abused, lying around with my feet in stirrups with a stranger fiddles about down there is never a fun experience for me, so if I can avoid doing it more than I have to, I will.

Whoops... I should have pointed out that HIV and HCV tests are nothing but blood draws (providing you're okay with those; I know quite a few people who totally freak out and sometimes pass out from the sight of blood).

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At our local centre they test your for everything, blood tests, internal swabs, HIV, Syphilis, everything. I went recently and came out clear. I had been celibate for a year so most STD's would have had time to develop between the last time I had sex (though I used protection) and testing. I have talked to him about the abuse, I actually like sex a lot and am pretty uninhibited, people have commented on that, but sometimes I do have flashbacks. He knows this happens and what I want to happen while I get back in the room.

Loon, he has been cold turkey for three and a half years, no longer associates with the people he took drugs with, or lives in that area. he used to party a lot, now he has given that up too. He doesn't drink either. I am not too worried that he will go back, I am willing to risk it. I talked to my uncle, who is a drugs rehab worker, to get his advice, and he seems to think that my boyfriend sounds like he is on the straight and narrow. He is even going to quit smoking cigarettes this month.

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