Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

bipolar and sex?


Guest Guest_jessabel_*

Recommended Posts

Guest Guest_jessabel_*

hi jsut foudn out my fiance is bipolar, he has cheated on me several times. adn recently caught, by me, looking for sex on myspace??

now he wa sin a manina at teh teim, does this mean he really want to do this but just let it out because of teh mania?

He loves me and we have been together for 11 years, he never really seesm sexual charged that much, I should say overly... but now I'm freaked out as to is this a result of what his docotor called hyper sexuality? my point is is he acting out what he really wants to do, but other teims wouldnt' do?

I'm so confused!

My brother is bp 1, but is different.. adn one of my best friends is bp1... God it is liek wild fire!

I have all sorts of shit to so don't mistake my words for putting those with bp down..

thanks

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guess I wnas't logged in when I wrote that, but I am a member here nad have been coming here for a few years now:0)

hi jsut foudn out my fiance is bipolar, he has cheated on me several times. adn recently caught, by me, looking for sex on myspace??

now he wa sin a manina at teh teim, does this mean he really want to do this but just let it out because of teh mania?

He loves me and we have been together for 11 years, he never really seesm sexual charged that much, I should say overly... but now I'm freaked out as to is this a result of what his docotor called hyper sexuality? my point is is he acting out what he really wants to do, but other teims wouldnt' do?

I'm so confused!

My brother is bp 1, but is different.. adn one of my best friends is bp1... God it is liek wild fire!

I have all sorts of shit to so don't mistake my words for putting those with bp down..

thanks

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My opinion based on what info you gave:

He's cheated on you several times.

He may be manic but you still take responsibility for your actions. It sucks, but you're still accountable for the stuff that happens. If he's manic and hypersexual he could be expressing it within the confines of his relationship. But he's not. I don't think this is really a bipolar issue but more of a relationship issue. The BP may play a part but it's not the driving force for him seeking other people.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you are in what you understand to be a monogamous, exclusive relationship, heading for marriage, and your fiance repeatedly cheats on you and trawls for sex with other women, then you have a problem. Either this is something is doing that is premeditated and in his control, in which case you need to leave, or he is doing this fuelled by mania, however in the latter case, I would have expected him to get the mania under control, blocked certain sites, deleted other girls numbers etc, and made efforts to resist temptation. Has he done any of this?

I get manic, and have not yet cheated on anyone, and never intend to. It is not that mania always equals and excuses unfaithfulness.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

bipolar disorder manias are not nymphomanias. bipolar disorder is not an excuse for cheating. i've never used it as an excuse and i'm offended when people use it as one. he needs to step up and take personal responsibility for his actions.

you deserve better than the cheating slime. you should dump him. remember, marriage is supposed to be forever. do you want to be married to this cheater? he doesn't deserve you!

anyway, just IMO.

bp is no excuse for cheating.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 months later...

i hope this posts in the right place... with my experience my husband is bi polar. i watch him very closely and i talk to him about all of his thought. he has cheated on me a few times. i know he has sexual issues number one because he wants it all the time. sex is how he deals with problems because its the instant feel good thing that (from what i heard) bp people like. when our first child was born he slept with two different girls all in one week about 6 days after she was born. that whole week he was so happy and self confident, he acted like he was the king and i was his bitch. then the next week he started getting really depressed and saying he was a piece of shit and everything came pouring out of his mouth. i think this is his bp completely... they get on there high and think they can do no wrong and make bad decisions, and when they go to there depressed state they regret and realize what they did wrong. i dont think you can fully blame bp because a lot of them dont cheat. but people with that kind of sex drive i think that bp def plays a role in it. with my husband i def know it was that instant gratification that he wanted and thats bp.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well speaking from a males perspective...

I'm constantly want sex. No med has ever killed me drive for it longer than a week. When I'm manic sex is all consuming. It becomes the only thing in life that matters to me. I'll do anything for it. I am however married to a woman whose sex drive is simply not up to par with mine even when I am not manic. I do think about cheating when I'm manic. In fact I actively look into it. I browse things like craigslist and adultfriendfinder. But I also know that I am manic and that when I am not manic I wont be able to live with having cheated. So I find alternatives (some not so great like getting exceedingly drunk some nights), such as going to the gym or just playing forcing myself to sleep through the worst of my need for it. I dont know if I'll always win the fight to stay faithful but I'll know if I do slip it'll be only after I've tried the damned hardest not to.

Oh and I should mention that my wife and I talk which really helps. She knows when I'm manic I need sex (literally need, I dont know how many others can relate but to me its a need like breathing or drinking water) more often and she tries to be there to help.

Guess what I'm saying is dump his ass hard and fast. He just wants to fuck plain and simple. He's doing it now, he'll keep doing it after you're married. Only difference is then you have to go through all the paperwork involved in a divorce and that will mess your life up something fierce. So get out now, it may hurt like all hell but its a lot less painful to rip a bandade off quickly then it is to sit there and peel it off a little at a time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wow, my reply is almost a quote of madgod. I get so horny I can't do my job and have to cover myself when I walk down the hall. I think about having sex with every woman I talk to, with every woman who smiles at me. I also check sites like adultfriendfinder because I want to feel wanted and need an outlet. If offered the choice between death and infidelity, I would choose the former. I'm bipolar. I'm sexually frustrated in the extreme, I'm in love. People will argue and disagree but I draw the line at touching, because that's real. Dump your guy. To him you are a hole, not a woman. That sounds like a hard thing to hear; cheating is a hard thing to feel. Fix it. You'll respect you when you do. You'll free yourself to find another and think "why did I wait so long to find you"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wow, my reply is almost a quote of madgod. I get so horny I can't do my job and have to cover myself when I walk down the hall. I think about having sex with every woman I talk to, with every woman who smiles at me. I also check sites like adultfriendfinder because I want to feel wanted and need an outlet. If offered the choice between death and infidelity, I would choose the former. I'm bipolar. I'm sexually frustrated in the extreme, I'm in love. People will argue and disagree but I draw the line at touching, because that's real. Dump your guy. To him you are a hole, not a woman. That sounds like a hard thing to hear; cheating is a hard thing to feel. Fix it. You'll respect you when you do. You'll free yourself to find another and think "why did I wait so long to find you"

I've been watching the Shotime series 'Dexter". All other comments aside, the character offered up a great soliloquy this week on the thrill of his impulses was that they are so perfectly correctly WRONG. That really stuck in my head because when I've been manic--I've been very very bad. Like bad in a way that's just shocking.

So, in the context of sex drive that's state-dependent, I wouldn't trust any personal judgments and would only probably feel "safe" about anything that occurred pretty run-of-the-mill in a comitted, monogamous relationship. Everything else is just SUSPECT with moi.

$0.02

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...