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Cycling trauma issues?


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I am very depressed right now, and I'm noticing that when I'm depressed, old trauma issues seem to resurface. I just feel really vulnerable and "wounded" and jumpy. I used to meet full dx criteria for PTSD (abuse), but I've come a long way in therapy, etc. But...a lot of it seems to come back when I feel like shit....which only makes me feel worse.

Anyone else deal with cycling trauma issues? How do you deal with it?  ;)

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I have the "awful thoughts" spiral. Do you think it's the same?

They sort of act like dominoes "gee I wish XXX were still around. I remember when he died ." and then on to the next and next. Usually the same things in a sort of different order. All the most awful things.

What I do to break up the spiral is turn on mindless TV (an oxy-moron, I know) or get out of bed or listen to really loud music. Sometimes it works. about 50/50.

Change causes persistance

The more you try to change someting the more it remains the same. Nine Inch Nails had it right with "the downward spiral".

Funny, I never am aware of an upward spiral.......... ;) ..

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Karen I like that phrase. I'm going to swipe it and tell my tdoc the next time I'm swirling in the toilet. Or find a plunger ;)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hey c@, how ya doing? It's actually technical jargon (re: depressive episodic symptomology) so you can wow 'em in your session.  You'll sound all smart-like hehe.

Karen

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Hey there darling,

I feel you.  Dealing with it currently.  I also previously met PTSD and out it swoops for obsessive thoughts!

The best thing I can do is to make sure anything that remotely reminds me of the situation is no where in sight or sound.  The other is to keep as busy as possible which is extremely difficult.  I find that the more my day is scheduled, whether it be busy or relaxing activities, the less time I have to spiral down in on my own emotions.  The tough part is following the schedule.  The jumpiness is harder to cope with, but (my friends actually told me stop looking "so damn paranoid" yesterday) I have to consciously keep refocusing on something else.  As much as I wanted to lay around yesterday like a pile of mud, I let them drag me out, and kept refocusing, refocusing, refocusing, and for a while, it went totally away.  I had fun.

It bites big, hairy ass when all that crap comes back, especially when its supposed to be over and done with.  It should go back to its hole and snore peacefully with the rest of the baggage we've all buried.  I hope this helps a little, and I hope you are feeling a teensy bit better today.

JBella

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