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hey ya'll

well i have nine and half hours till my appointment and i am so friggen scared its not funny. and i feel guilty becuase me kids are suffering because of me, and if its an old issue then I am not as strong as everyone thinks I am.  and that makes me feel horbal because if i had been stronger this shit would have never happened in the first place.  if that is not the case, i am  worried that my issue is my four year old son.  he is so hard to care for, we have tried everything we can think of to tone down the attitude and the anger and the frustration,  this part is since he was born.  I love him, but he has been hell from day one. the kid still doesn't sleep all night and he gets so mad. and if he is the issue what kind of mother does that make me.  I come from a family ofall girls, my granpapa hand 11 grand girls. and one great grand gir, wich would me my ten year old, I don't know crap about little boys.  then there is the possibiliy that we wont find the trigger for this mess, then what do I do.  god this sucks ;)

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Ouch - son not sleeping and agressive sounds familiar - my daughter has been down that road.  Much better now after years of behavior therapy and 2 years trying to find right meds.  You should have him evaluated separate from yourself because it sounds like you each have separate issues. I'm MDD but daughter is ADHD, OCD and provisional bipolar.

Good luck at your appt today!

Igloo

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Another mom of a mentally interesting kid speaking up here ... it's not your fault!!!  What you're talking about goes beyond parenting methods.  Even if it's just his temperament (some kids are just wired that way, y'know?) and not a medical issue, it's still not your fault.  If you have specific situations or problems with him that you want to discuss, you should visit the Parenting board - there's lots of helpful crazy mommies and daddies on this site (witness your responses here already) <grin>

... and if its an old issue then I am not as strong as everyone thinks I am.  and that makes me feel horbal because if i had been stronger this shit would have never happened in the first place.

Hopefully the very first thing this new therapist will help you with is the guilt!  It sounds like it's overwhelming you.  We are who we are.  Shit happens to us.  Our bodies/brains deal with it in mysterious ways.  It sounds like you're getting good help and jumping through all the hoops to fix the issues that are staring you in the face.  You sound plenty strong to me. 

I hope your therapy appointment went well.

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Has it occurred to you to get him evaluated for...something? That kind of insomnia is NOT NORMAL.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

yes it has occured and the doctor said somthing about blood work up and maybe a psyc evalv.  I think I worded it wrong, He does sleep he just wakes up 4 or 5 times a night.  No wonder he is a little grumpy but.  I am working up the courage to take him back.  It scares me that there might be somthing wrong, but at the same time it might be easier on us if we new there was a problem, and he is not just being a but head.

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Has it occurred to you to get him evaluated for...something? That kind of insomnia is NOT NORMAL.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

yes it has occured and the doctor said somthing about blood work up and maybe a psyc evalv.  I think I worded it wrong, He does sleep he just wakes up 4 or 5 times a night.  No wonder he is a little grumpy but.  I am working up the courage to take him back.  It scares me that there might be somthing wrong, but at the same time it might be easier on us if we new there was a problem, and he is not just being a but head.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thank you for clearing that up.

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