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Hi -

I haven't been around in a while and I wanted to say hello to everyone and pass along the good news that it is actually possible to go into full remission from unipolar depression. I got lucky and got better and finally emerged from major depressive episode number five, which lasted for a little over two years.

I haven't been in touch for so long because I took a job in Iraq and all internet activity is closely monitored so I didn't want to out myself. I lied like a rug about my MI and am also pleased to report that Wellbutrin doesn't show up in the standard pre-employment drug screen. I'm still faithfully downing 450 mg a day of the SR variety and was also lucky to find a doctor willing to prescribe a year's supply.

Although I disagree with the situation in Iraq, I figured if they were going to pay someone to work there, it might as well be me. I realize I've become a hypocrite, but on the other hand, it's amazing how easily you can put aside your personal integrity when you're on the brink of homelessness. I am working on getting out from under the mountain of debt I accumulated while being sick for two years, and was able to save my home from foreclosure.

I'm lucky to be posted on a large base out in the middle of nowhere so we've only been hit three times in the last several months, as opposed to many places that get hit three times a day. My body armor is under my desk collecting dust, which is a good place for it. I don't have to go outside the wire so I'm living in an insulated world, although constantly surrounded by soldiers and their equipment. We work ridiculous hours (seven days a week, twelve hours a day) and I wasn't sure I'd be up for it, but I'm doing fine.

I'm also interviewing for other work overseas and not in Iraq - the old adage is true that once you have a job, it's easier to find another one. I'm home on R&R right now, and hopefully I won't be going back to Iraq, but will succeed with one of the other companies that's shown an interest in me.

The other really good thing that's happened is that I managed to become lovers with a Turkish man I met there who works for a different company. He doesn't speak a lot of English, and I don't know a great deal of Turkish, but we manage to communicate, and that universal language is a wonderful thing. I'm not in love and don't know when I'll get to see him again, but it's been fun while it lasted. I'm embarrassed to say how many years it had been since I'd made love and I had drawn the rather grim conclusion that I probably wouldn't ever again. It's been good for me on a number of levels to passionately kiss someone in the Iraq moonlight.

I know the odds are way over 90% that I'll get sick again at some point in the future. I try to keep that thought far in the back of my mind, because it scares me to death if I think about it too much. In the meantime it's been very reassuring that I've been able to recover one more time. I hope you all get as lucky as I have.

Catnapper

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Catnapper, I couldn't be happier for you. If you manage to get together with your sweetie again, say "seni seviyorum." heh I had a Turkish lover once and he taught me that phrase.

I'm so glad the Wellbutrin is working and that you saved your house! Good for you and I hope the upward trend continues.

olga ;)

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Cat,

What a fab story. It's not hypocritical. We all have our choices to make and it's hard to be an unemployed homeless activist for an antiwar cause, you can do more if you work with the system to put yourself in a better position to change it, IMHO.

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  • 2 weeks later...

cat,

that's what this joint is all about. you are the second in as many days to post that you are back on your game. this sort of message is what keeps member's eye on the ball. if i keep on keeping on for a few more weeks, i will add my name to the list of healed crackpots.

big money to be made in mcmurdo down in antarctica. might have to give up your turkish jones and settle for penguins though.

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Damn,Cat

And I thought we just

Talked about,

AR-15s.

I love it about

Your Heroic Turk,

to me a foreign affair,

would be a lady from

Canada or Utah.

Best wishes

and Torrid Desert Nights.

Stasis

Don't worry, Stasis, I got in a little target practice with the old AR-15 while I've been home, and I'm still a pretty good shot! As far as international affairs, I think this can placed in the goodwill ambassador category.....

Heading back out next week, so don't be surprised if I disappear for a while again. As we say in Iraq, keep your head down, but not down there! And thanks to everyone for the nice replies.

Catnapper

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