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Dumped For Getting Friend Suicide Help!


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i had a friend who kept making suicide threats. he's 24, and back when he was 18, almost ;) died because he slit his wrists and laid down in the bathtub.

so i took his threats seriously, like you should any threats, regardless.

i talked to my tdoc about it, and we called the crisis line for the place where he lives. they called him to check on him (he was in another state visiting his sister's funeral, one reason for the sadness), and said they're going to check on him again when he returns.

he must have known it was me, because now i'm blocked on his phone. my calls won't go through.

why? i did the right thing- i could have saved my friend's life! my dad committed suicide and i couldn't go through another one- i couldn't go through one at all.

my tdoc says this friend has all the markings of an anti-social personality disorder.

why do you think i'm getting the rebuff for helping?

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My husband never really appreciated when I had him involuntarily commited even if it was the right thing too. Of course, he still talks to me though ;).

It is easier to hate you than to admit he has a problem. I think your tdoc is right. Don't take it personal.

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why do you think i'm getting the rebuff for helping?

Why? Probably because you pissed him off.

In his mind you probably just made his life more complicated and difficult for the time being. It doesn't matter that you did the right thing and did it out of love and concern.

When I feel that bad about myself and my life, I think that the people who care about me suck.

He's mentally ill, and right now not thinking straight. If he's the type to hold a grudge, he may never forgive you.

Hopefully he will forgive you.

-- B

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Because sometimes people feel they have a right to be able to die, and your friend could feel like you went behind his back and betrayed his confidance. In his mind, you told on him and took control over an aspect in his life that he didn't want controlled. So he's upset. Hopefully he'll come around and realize that you only did so out of concern and wanting to help. But trust can be a fickle thing.. and he may only see your decision as one that helps you feel better for doing something, and him feel worse for the intrusion.

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of course people get mad when their SU attempts get frustrated. i would be incredubly pissed. cannot explain why, but it is like that.

someday, when he decides to accept someone's help, he will (secretly maybe) thank you for caring about him.

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i had a friend who kept making suicide threats. he's 24, and back when he was 18, almost ;) died because he slit his wrists and laid down in the bathtub.

so i took his threats seriously, like you should any threats, regardless.

i talked to my tdoc about it, and we called the crisis line for the place where he lives. they called him to check on him (he was in another state visiting his sister's funeral, one reason for the sadness), and said they're going to check on him again when he returns.

he must have known it was me, because now i'm blocked on his phone. my calls won't go through.

why? i did the right thing- i could have saved my friend's life! my dad committed suicide and i couldn't go through another one- i couldn't go through one at all.

I hate to say it but needy people are rebuffers. That's one reason they are so needy. Part of BPD is the swing between "come here" and "go away". You've been blocked but it won't last. Just don't ever become the type of person who rebuffs people who are asking for help, cause that's just ugly. And you seem too beautiful to ever be that way. Bless you for your efforts, you will always be rewarded for that, one way or another!

my tdoc says this friend has all the markings of an anti-social personality disorder.

why do you think i'm getting the rebuff for helping?

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