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head banging


betcsu

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sometimes my kids get yelling at each other and im finding it more and more distressing. just a few minutes ago, im sitting up here in my bed playing on my laptop when they went at it again. instead of yelling back at them or begging them to pleeeeeease stop, i whacked the back my head as hard as i could several times against the wall im leaning on. i found as soon as i did it my breathing slowed and i was became much calmer. of course it hurt like heck but i was able to just breathe thru it and not say a word while i let my hubby take care of their discipline. i found it brought me SO much relief, but i dont want to get into this again. i used to do it quite a lot but havent done it in nearly a year.

i dont know if i have a question or why im really posting, but i guess i just wanted to get it out there. anyone else do this? (ha! there was a question!)

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Dear,

DO NOT BANG YOUR HEAD.

As someone who has suffered a brain injury, let me assure you that it is much easier to injure yourself than you think. And you already have problems thinking clearly. Brain injuries are not treatable and not curable.

Please find just about anything else to do, but bang.

a.m.

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I've done that, too. I've also hit my head on a few other surfaces. It wasn't something I did all of the time, so it didn't occur to me that it was a problem until very recently (When I got extremely frustrated and felt the urge to do it again - I didn't, thankfully).

My head banging was more or less replaced by practicing martial arts. Instead of hitting myself, other people hit me. I stopped practicing after two years. I would like to go back, but I'm afraid that I'd like the pain a little too much.

I mostly stick to hitting my speed bag now a-days. It's pretty gratifying. Pillows work, too.

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betcsu:

I do that [either bang my head on some thing or just hit my head] It's kind of an issue and something I try really hard to not do but I feel like it's a natural reaction. Like fight or flight. Finding any way you can to force yourself to breath slower, concentrate on any aspect of your body that your feel is going hay-wire and trying to recorrect it may help. Even if you have to force slower breathing through gritted teeth, eventually you will again reach homeostasus.

Sorry I can't be much more help.

I don't like to write about it a whole lot. It's embarrassing because I've ben doing it since I was a little kid but I wanted to respond.

I hope you can find ways to calm down that work.

Luna

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I used to do it and only once did it recently.

For me it is a sign that I am out of control- mostly with unbearable anger that I don't know how to handle.

It was my last activity before my first hospitalization. I don't reccommend it. I think it brings relief because its such a sudden distraction from your thoughts.

I'd have to agree with AM - it can be really dangerous- once i did it so hard that i saw a flash of white light- it was sooo scary.

I found that the suggestions people gave me to hit other things ( pillows or other inanimate objects- when i tried they seemed to work only to wind me up more and look for other self destructive things to do.

The first things they taught me in the hospital were to write, draw, paint with watercolors

( i'm no artist, but each of these was far more calming. the writing helped figure out why i was so upset even if just doodles- gave me something to bring to tdoc to talk about.

I hope the children settle down and allow you to. take good care of yourself.

mrs l

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Dear,

DO NOT BANG YOUR HEAD.

As someone who has suffered a brain injury, let me assure you that it is much easier to injure yourself than you think. And you already have problems thinking clearly. Brain injuries are not treatable and not curable.

Please find just about anything else to do, but bang.

a.m.

you are so right and i appreciate your bluntness. ive been fighting a dang headache ever since i did it and have had to take a tylenol ever 6-8 hours since i did it. im hoping to wake up headache free tomorrow as ive learned my lesson (for now) and am ready to be over it.

i also want to apologize for my laughing comment earlier this morning. i was on very little sleep and though i know you were serious in your response, i just found it humourous at the time. but i do know its NOT funny and im sorry i laughed.

thanks again for your concern! AM - youre amazing and i really appreciate YOU! thanks!

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Dear God did I have issues with this as a child (and occasionally as an adult). At any societal rejection, I'd go find the heaviest book possible and start banging on my head with it... this happened from about the ages of 10 to 13. I think it was partially my autism-type issues, but I'm sure my MDD (since the age of 9) had something to do with it, especially since I had ;) attempted suicide a few times in that time period.

I did the book-head-banging at school a lot, and a few of my teachers complained to my parents (I assume their intention was to convince my parents to seek help for me). As treatment, my parents yelled at me for being anti-social, yelling being the standard form of family psychotherapy in their homeland (India). But that's a whole 'nother rant.

I don't think I hit hard enough to cause any sort of brain damage, since I went on many years later to get a good GPA at a respected university. Plus, people still thought I was verbally articulate (and even "charming") until my recent (other reason-induced) brain damage started happening.

Fast-forward to 2006 (me: age 22), which is when I moved to Georgia and started a job with a difficult to deal with boss (though he wasn't as difficult as my previous boss in Maryland!). I did do the "head-banging" thing just a couple of times... the only problem is that the head-banging was done with the assistance of my apartment's front door, which was made out of metal. Banging your head on metal is one thing, but banging your head on metal so hard that dents are formed is another!

AM--

Sorry about the brain damage you had incurred. It's entirely possible that part of my current neurological issue/s involved using my head to put dents in a metal door. However, I do wonder if all brain damage is irreversible (for example, people who suffer a brief (transient ischemic) stroke and are properly treated before a full-on stroke occurs). I assume, though, that you're talking about traumatic/mechanical brain injury. As for me, I loathe to think that any part of my hydrocephalus-induced dementia is permanent.

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late, but here are the three rules. now the premise is the kids are not fighting each other, they are actually fighting for your attention

best to start with. it's OKAY for you to fight if you stay within these 3 rules

1. if i can hear you fighting there will be disipline (move to the other room rule)

2. no tattle-taleing period

3. don't seriously injur each other

amazing that even tho we were "allowed" my siblings and i didn't fight that much. when we did it was to work out our issuses and not to pull mom and dad in

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Dear,

DO NOT BANG YOUR HEAD.

As someone who has suffered a brain injury, let me assure you that it is much easier to injure yourself than you think. And you already have problems thinking clearly. Brain injuries are not treatable and not curable.

Please find just about anything else to do, but bang.

a.m.

banging your head beats slitting your wrists or finding other ways to shuffle off the mortal coil. if you've never done it then you don't know jack, thanks. maybe a little brain damage would make some of us better in the long run.

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