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Fukitol


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To put it simply, I need some Fukitol. Although, I'm not sure that makes me any different than anyone else here.

I'm on Abilify now and it's pissing me the hell off. Literally. I'm so goddamn pissed about fucking nothing. It helps keep me from being completely manic. It helps me sleep (sort of). Just like normal life: Damned if you do. damned if you don't.

Part of it is, it disrupts my sleep like nothing fucking else. I can't sleep though a night to save my life. I hate it.

What's worse: I think it's making me depressed and making my depression worse. Not only am I pissed as all hell, I'm just about as depressed as I was at my worst last time I was down. That scares me more than anything. I was so preoccupied with death and suicide I couldn't do anything else but think about that shit.

I'm calling my doc tomorrow, but I just needed a place to bitch. I'm in such a bad mood plus I'm depressed. All I wanna do is go get drunk or stoned. I guess the good news is that I'm doing neither. Can't drink because these fucking devil pills make me sick in combination with alcohol, and I can't smoke for multiple reasons (most impotantly is the fact that I can't get an--and if I could, my bong's gone and I can't roll).

Bottom line: I need some Fukitol.

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I know the feeling...

Abilify happens to work for me but I've had problems with many other meds. How much Abilify are you taking and how long have you been taking it?

only 5mg, but i seem to be overly-sensitive to meds. i've only been on it for a week and a half or so.

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It worked really slowly for me. I started at 5mg and stayed there for several weeks. It kind of snuck (is that even a word?) up on me. One day I noticed that I felt better, a lot better, but it took longer than a week and a half.

well I hope I get there soon.

I do recall having problems sleeping but it didn't last long. Any chance your doc will give you something to hold you over until the Abilify has a chance to work? Maybe some benzo? Or Ambien? It was well worth putting up with the startup problems for me.

I don't know, I hope so. I think a lot of my irritability problems are stemming from the lack of sleep (read: good sleep).

I just had an awkward conversation with my mom (who is also my boss) about work tonight because I was extra pissy tonight. She felt like I was taking everything out on her, etc. etc. I'm sure some of you have had that talk before. She then did what I expected her to do and blame the medicine for all my problems and tried to tell me I was better before them. I couldn't beat into her hard enough that's just not the case. I was told over and over that I just need to find more patience and calm down more. Ugh, that just makes me even more pissed.

Part of me wants to jump on the Abilify and blame that for my impatience and whatnot, but I know that if I wasn't on it, the mania would have pushed me over the edge, but I don't know that anyone understands that. I really think that it's helping--even if just to take the edge of the mania off--a little. I just need to be more patient with it. And I need to keep telling myself that. It's these goddamn side effects that I don't know if I can handle (and some I don't even know if they are side effects).

See? This is why I want that Fukitol!

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