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Feeling good to know there are others like me...

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I was searching for Dermatillomania, and found this board. I felt immediately excited to read a few posts, as people are undergoing similar situations as myself - and that makes me feel less crazy!

I don't consider myself crazy. I do exhibit some behavior that I find disruptive to my life, and I choose to treat it with medication. I have been on SSRI's for 6 years, and can now live life with less meltdowns, and more progress!

I'm a full time college student, biochemistry/molecular biology, and might go into psychiatry. I love people, especially people who need help, and I love to learn/read/research about what might be going on biologically.

Before I began SSRI's I was an angry person. I would yell at cashiers and fast food workers for messing up my order, and was very critical of most people. I used to search for love, and when a relationship fell apart, so did I. Now I rarely date, and spend most of my time with my mother, my daughter, and the father of my daughter.

Lately I have been slacking on the school work. I'm taking 5 classes, and this week I skipped every class. I'm too competitive to let my A go, so I'll fight to do well. This leads me to stress, and yucky feelings, and then a meltdown, and then release.

My main reason for chemically induced rationalism is my daughter. She is the most joyous accompanyment that my life has, and I want her to develop healthy self esteem and be a kind, generous person. And I want her to learn math and science (hehe).

I fear telling people about my disthymia/depression because I don't want to be stereotyped. I am a harmless, creative, science geek who loves music, sunshine, playing with my kid, and helping others. There is such a stigma for us who have mental issues. Like we are going to go postal or something. I am more afraid of the people who have problems, but refuse help. I think we are the more rational people because we choose to help ourselves and that requires strength.

I love Freddie Mercury and Queen, Stevie Wonder, The Beatles, and most popular country music.

I'm so glad to have found this board, and hope to help others and myself.


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