Guest luli2545 Posted July 18, 2005 Share Posted July 18, 2005 Hello, Wow, crazyboards/crazymeds is pretty complex! I hope I'm posting in the right place.... I'm taking 150 mg effexor a.m. and 1 mg. ativan at night. I was on serzone for 2-3 years. Before that imiprimine and other imines.....I was really afraid to take meds. I started meds for depression/anxiety/ptsd stuff after some yukky stuff happened to me too fast...about 13 years ago. But before the stuff happened I knew I was "down," and I also had panic early morning wakening about 2 -3 times a month. I knew I had an emotionally distant spouse, a lonely marriage but I kept hoping, didn't know what to do. A friend mentioned this site about a year ago but today I found your site... I had a long marriage/family...kids are semi grown up, been single about 4-5 years.... I'm just checking in.... I think I should be on 225 effexor but I don't feel "too" bad...and the psych. Dr. said I could do as I wished with it, depending on how I felt. I can afford the 75 addt'l mgs. (no insurance) but I'm sort of pissed off (and a little scared of effexor, due to what I've read) so I don't take the additional dosage.... 1 & 1/2 yrs. ago switched from serzone to effexor. I cried for about two months...changing meds really has sucked. Initially about 12 yrs. ago I was on depakote too... but the psych. Dr. kept reducing it, but I was afraid to get off it so I stayed on 250 mg for 3 years when I was on the serzone. I can't tell any difference being off it now, but I do recall initially 1000 or 1250 mg depakote along with whatever AD , and I watched the lilacs bloom from my couch for two seasons before I realized how zombied I was. So the Psych. Dr. said, hmm, you really don't need this... I guess I don't cycle...people don't think I do...I don't guess I have mania or hypomania... I DID have a ton of anxiety...I kept the 250 mg because I was terrified of going back to chaotic terror, even tho the Dr. said it was subclinical dose... I feel the same off of it as on it. Anyhow, thanks for letting me elaborate... I have a tough time now making the efforts I think would help... I get to work ok... have to eat am,noon,pm...I mean I have to work at that or I'm a basket case by 4 pm... it's easy to just not bother...but I'm better....when I was younger food wasn't something I thought affected me....Actually eating is really important, and I struggle to remember to eat...it's a huge deal right now. I recently forced myself to sign up for an insight meditation class once a week...I've gone twice; I love how I feel when I'm there with them...I'm not planning to be a daily meditator at the moment since ...whatever....just not now.... trying to let myself just enjoy the class... I hate that I feel alone...that I live "single," that it seems like so much work to just be in neutral...not too high, not too low. Anyhow, I like reading your posts. I'm not sure how to get around this site but it will be fun to do that... thanks for reading, Luli2545 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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