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Everything's fine?

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The longest i can seem to go without cutting/burning is about 3-31/2 weeks.

Just yesterday i was at my therapist's office talking about how well i am doing, how i haven't even thought about hurting myself. Then last night, i did it again.

Why is it that when i am feeling good i can't even imagine doing it. I went a good 3 weeks without, but then, like clockwork...almost like a mood regulator. Like i have to do something bad once in a while to make myself feel good the rest of the time.

I had planned on doing more today, but cleaned the house instead, so that's good. i'm still on the see-saw though.

Sorry for rambling...but, does anyone else feel like, 'oh, i'll never do that again' and then turn around and do it?


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