wifezilla Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 Hubby has been on Lamital and is up too 100 mg. He is more like himself and is doing well. He has also been on Zyprexa for almost 2 years, and went from 5 mg to 15 mg when his depression hit. He stopped taking the Zyprexa the other day because he says it makes his head feel like it weighs 100lbs and he can't get up in the mornings. He is going to discuss this with his pdoc tomorrow. But anyway.... Now that he is getting better, I still have a big concern. He seems to be totally unable to judge his moods...when he is anxious for real reasons and when his illness is flaring up? Is he depressed because our finances suck...or do our finances suck because he is stuck in depression? Is he happy and energetic because he is having a good day, or are we boarding the mania train? Trying to give him feedback is very frustrating because he doesn't listen (he is a tad stubborn..LOL). Plus, I can't spend my life as his mood barometer. I have been totally focused on him and his illness for about 2 years and I am sick to death of it. I know he needs to discuss this with his tdoc... I explained to him that I am also not happy with him tinkering with his meds because he is so bad at judging his moods. If he could get a handle on the mood states thing, the doctors would have no problem with him adjusting dosages, but as he is now, I don't trust his abilities. He did call the pdoc about the zyprexa, but couldn't get through (not uncommon) and he does see him tomorrow. Until he works through this in therapy, any helpful suggestions or ideas would be appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiona Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 Watch out for that self-medication thing -- it's way too common for people who are feeling better to decide they don't need medication anymore and play with the doses or even stop it on their own. I'm glad he's going to talk about it with his pdoc. You're right that you can't be his mood monitor, he has to learn to do that himself. Does it really matter whether he depressed about finances or the finances are depressing him? He recognizes himself as depressed and is probably depressed about both at the same time. It's also important to remember that even 'normal' people have variations in mood -- good days and bad ones, anxious times and not. So just because he's had some anxiety, even if he doesn't have a clear reason, it's not necessarily the illness and even if it is it doesn't necessarily require a med change unless it lasts a long time. I take the moods as they come, good days or bad ones, without always looking to analyze what's causing them. If they last more than a few days or seem copletely unreasonable and won't go away then I start to worry. Fiona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wifezilla Posted July 21, 2005 Author Share Posted July 21, 2005 "it's way too common for people who are feeling better to decide they don't need medication anymore" After his last hospitalization (about 2 years ago) we had a big talk. I told him that I know it is his choice whether or not to keep taking his medication. It is also my choice of whether or not to stay with an unmedicated bipolar. I told him my choice would be to leave even though I loved him very much. I could not stand by and watch him be sick as a BP anymore than I would stand by and watch a diabetic eat Twinkies and drink Mountain Dew all day. If you want to destroy yourself, I can't stop you but I don't have to watch. He freaked out a bit, but understands my position and decided he wants to stay married. "I take the moods as they come, good days or bad ones, without always looking to analyze what's causing them. If they last more than a few days or seem completely unreasonable and won't go away then I start to worry." Exactly! One of the reasons he quit lithium many moons ago is because it made him completely flat. He didn't like who he was on lithium and neither did I. I expect normal ups and downs, and don't want to spend my time being anxious and second guessing every mood turn...that would just make ME crazy! Thanks so much for your insights Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wifezilla Posted July 22, 2005 Author Share Posted July 22, 2005 Update... Pdoc has blessed hubby dropping the zyprexa. Doc wants him to try going up to 175mg on the lamictal if his condition doesn't continue to improve. If it keeps getting better at 100mg, thats fine with him too. Pdoc has given him some leaway. Seroquel is still prn. For me, it has been a great couple of days. Looks like my hubby is back to more of his old self. We are joking and laughing together like we used to. He smiles now, and can actually enjoy the moment instead of stressing about the future. I still want him to discuss moods with tdoc. I think she will be pleasantly surprised at his turnaround the last few days. Lamictal gets my thumbs up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruins Posted July 23, 2005 Share Posted July 23, 2005 For me, it has been a great couple of days. Looks like my hubby is back to more of his old self. We are joking and laughing together like we used to. He smiles now, and can actually enjoy the moment instead of stressing about the future. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Just wanted to offer up my congratulations Ruins Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wifezilla Posted July 26, 2005 Author Share Posted July 26, 2005 Thanks Ruins... Had a set back the other day...5 minutes on the phone with his mother and he was back to square one. SHeeshh! Anyway, he is doing better today and seems to be getting back on track. Seems that every time there is a dosage change on the lamictal, he gets some wild mood swings for a day or two. I can see it is working, just not consistently yet. Stability is on the horizon...just not coming fast enough! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiona Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Had a set back the other day...5 minutes on the phone with his mother and he was back to square one. SHeeshh! Talking to mother is enough to do this for a lot of people. Anyway, he is doing better today and seems to be getting back on track. Seems that every time there is a dosage change on the lamictal, he gets some wild mood swings for a day or two. I can see it is working, just not consistently yet. Stability is on the horizon...just not coming fast enough! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Yes, there will be some emotional shifting while changing dose. Also that getting back on track rapidly after a setback, like talking to his mother, is a very important indicator of improvement. Fiona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wifezilla Posted July 30, 2005 Author Share Posted July 30, 2005 He is still trying to recover from his setback. Lamictal is at 125 and slowly climbing. Hubby had a very rough tdoc session yesterday. She pointed out that he has not been following her treatment plan consistently and continues to choose a path that leads to wallowing in misery. This has been going on for a year and she is getting frustrated with him. I outright called him a selfish jerk. Hubby agreed he hasn't been doing his part. Strange thing is, he is doing much better today. Go figure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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