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Hi all,

I have been reading this forum for about a year now, but never signed up for an account till now.

Who am I? well I am a young guy with everything going for him. I have a great family, great job, never had a reason to be anything but happy. I laugh all the time, I have a great smile, people who know me would never think I was depressed. That's what I want them to think, but in reality I am the exact opposite.

Every day for as long as I can remember I have thought about suicide, I have never know what it feels like to be happy, the only feelings I have are depressed or suicidal. My dad who is my best mate told me a couple of weeks ago that he was dying of cancer, I had to stop myself from looking at the tv and try to focus on what he was saying. inside I didn't feel a thing.

I have been seeing a psychiatrist for over a year now, he has said that I am a weird one, that he has no idea why I feel this way. He does not want to diagnose me with anything but I would self diagnose myself as having major depression, general anxiety/panic disorder, insomnia, hypersomnia, depersonalisation disorder and possibly ADD.

Currently I am taking 275mg of the tricyclic Dothiepin at night, 25mg of Seroquel at night and 20mg of Valium during the day. It's keeping me going, just...

So yeah, to cut it short, hi everyone

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welcome. I'm glad you decided to made an account!

I'm very sorry to hear about your father. It is very difficult to hear that a parent is sick and be faced with the fact that they may not be here for much longer. It is definitely not an easy thing to deal with... for anyone... especially someone currently struggling with their own personal demons.

No matter what your diagnosis, I hope you find the boards helpful and, at times, comforting. If you have any questions/comments/concerns, don't hesitate to PM an administrator or moderator.

welcome again.

~Ophelia

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