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Feeling stuck

Guest jul

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I just found this site a few days ago and really love what you all are doing for each other. I hope someone can help me a bit.

I've got a cocktail of problems, each one making the others hard to deal with. There's general anxiety, plus social anxiety, plus depression, plus bp, plus dissasociation, plus si, now I'm worried about how bad I want to drink.

Right now I'm in a low period and have been si'ing occasionally and the only other way I have found to make the si less desirable is to drink. I don't have any alcohol in the house right now but I can't sleep because I want to si or drink so bad I can't settle down. I know I need help but my tdoc moved away and my social anxiety is making it so hard to find another one. It's just easier to drink myself to sleep or cut. But I can't let this take over because I will lose my job (I work with children and if I can't take care of myself then I shouldn't be taking care of them) and that is what I really live for right now. I just don't know what to do and I feel like i'm losing the battle.

Has anyone else been here? What did you do to get through it?

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I do think that you need some professional help with this issue. You say that your social anxiety is preventing you contacting another tdoc, which seems like a huge task right now with the state you are in. Can you not break the task down? Like by the end of the week, have two or three phone numbers of potential tdocs? By the end of the week after, have a friend who can call on your behalf to make a tdoc appt?

I just know that when I get anxious often it is because I am looking at things in too long overcomplicated blocks that look intimidating.

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