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I've recently tried to remember all of the crazy things I've done.

I realized how hyper sexuality has influenced my life.

In retrospect, it was fun (I guess) but also caused many regrettable one night stands.

I've got some sort of control over it now. I have for the past few years.

It was a long process but with the help of meds, God, and denying myself porn, I'm able to control it (most of the time)when those feelings come around..

For some reason I not only had these feelings while manic/hypomanic, I had them when I was really down too.

How has it affected yoU?

How do you deal with it?

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I've recently tried to remember all of the crazy things I've done.

I realized how hyper sexuality has influenced my life.

In retrospect, it was fun (I guess) but also caused many regrettable one night stands.

I've got some sort of control over it now. I have for the past few years.

It was a long process but with the help of meds, God, and denying myself porn, I'm able to control it (most of the time)when those feelings come around..

For some reason I not only had these feelings while manic/hypomanic, I had them when I was really down too.

Same here. Has plagued me. Only my closest friends know how many I've slept with!

I am glad this is being raised as I don't often see it mentioned. I once posted on another non-psychiatric board about it and they were really judgemental.

I've had them both hypomanic/manic and depressed. The only time I don't get it is when I am seriously stressed. Any hint of relaxation and boom!

How affected:

I was getting panicky as, no matter how many times I did it myself, it just got worse and worse and I wasn't particularly even hypomanic. It's scary when you have these huge heat rushes, almost waves of sexual energy that stop you doing what you need to be doing. When I was at work , sex was often in the back of my mind. Wehn I went to lectures at uni, could not concentrate as just thought about it all the way through the lectures if the lecturer was attractive.

Went to the doctor and she said the APs should control it, but they don't really.

She advised not wearing anything tight (!), exercising (seems to make it worse for me).

The way I deal with it is by remembering it's only a portion of the month, on and off, that it gets insane. I.e. booty calls all the way that week, then no need the following week. It would be great to be in a long-term relationship right now, but I have too much going on to go out on the look out.

Deep breathing, walking around, getting lost in conversation/novels/comedy, i.e. any more intellectual pursuits seems to help.

Unfortunately, even when I had sky-high prolactin, it was insane, and that is supposed to kill it.

Any other tips would be much appreciated.

How has it affected yoU?

How do you deal with it?

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Hahahaha...I know it's not funny, but this sounds so familiar to me. Unfortunately (and I really actually mean this) it would be nice to have had a bout of hypersexuality sometime in the last 4 years or so. The only place it's gone on is in my head as I loathe myself far too much to even consider trying to find a partner right now, even just one for the night, which sucks! ;)

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Good topic.

In the past, my illness seemed to take my judgement away. I regret some of the things I did (or people) Heh but I don't feel bad about it. I made a lot of bad decisions during my hypomanic periods, not just regarding sex. I don't feel bad for any of them. I was ill and it was what it was.

I haven't had any real periods of hypo-mania now for over five years.

Sunshine Outside

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I've recently tried to remember all of the crazy things I've done.

I realized how hyper sexuality has influenced my life.

In retrospect, it was fun (I guess) but also caused many regrettable one night stands.

I've got some sort of control over it now. I have for the past few years.

It was a long process but with the help of meds, God, and denying myself porn, I'm able to control it (most of the time)when those feelings come around..

For some reason I not only had these feelings while manic/hypomanic, I had them when I was really down too.

Same here. Has plagued me. Only my closest friends know how many I've slept with!

I am glad this is being raised as I don't often see it mentioned. I once posted on another non-psychiatric board about it and they were really judgemental.

I've had them both hypomanic/manic and depressed. The only time I don't get it is when I am seriously stressed. Any hint of relaxation and boom!

How affected:

I was getting panicky as, no matter how many times I did it myself, it just got worse and worse and I wasn't particularly even hypomanic. It's scary when you have these huge heat rushes, almost waves of sexual energy that stop you doing what you need to be doing. When I was at work , sex was often in the back of my mind. Wehn I went to lectures at uni, could not concentrate as just thought about it all the way through the lectures if the lecturer was attractive.

Went to the doctor and she said the APs should control it, but they don't really.

She advised not wearing anything tight (!), exercising (seems to make it worse for me).

The way I deal with it is by remembering it's only a portion of the month, on and off, that it gets insane. I.e. booty calls all the way that week, then no need the following week. It would be great to be in a long-term relationship right now, but I have too much going on to go out on the look out.

Deep breathing, walking around, getting lost in conversation/novels/comedy, i.e. any more intellectual pursuits seems to help.

Unfortunately, even when I had sky-high prolactin, it was insane, and that is supposed to kill it.

Any other tips would be much appreciated.

How has it affected yoU?

How do you deal with it?

First, I have an extremely sexual spouse, so if he's anywhere around I have an always willing partner. ;) But if he's off at work or running errands, I find the shower head and my overly active imagination an excellent substitute. I guess I don't see anything wrong with a little porn and a lubricated palm....it's better than hurting someone through a one night stand. Also, meeting your own needs prevents your catching an STD.

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I can't say that my hypersexuality has really "affected" me in any way. I mean, I have more partners in my past than I can count, but I'm so not ashamed of it. What has happened in my past made me the woman I am today. I'm not proud of my partner-filled past either. It's just part and parcel of this stupid illness of mine.

However, I know now that going out and seeking random guys is not productive and can be hazardous to my health. So, I "deal" with it by going online and having sex the safe way... ;) Yay for free porn and anonymous partners! It doesn't work for everyone, but it works for me.

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First, I have an extremely sexual spouse, so if he's anywhere around I have an always willing partner. :) ....it's better than hurting someone through a one night stand. Also, meeting your own needs prevents your catching an STD.

hypersexuality is extremely problematic for me, because I am not fortunate enough to have an accommodating spouse and I can't get her into therapy to even talk about it. The self-love solution worked for a while but 18 years of it is getting to be intolerable for me. I need contact with another human being. The worst part is I don't know if I can't leave because I love my kids too much or if it's really just I'm such a damned coward and I'm afraid to leave her (not to mention the economics.. my writer's pay ain't gonna get me anywhere and I've already been on the street before). Plus everyone just makes me feel guilty (or I let them make me feel guilty, I dunno) because I'm a guy and I'm just supposed to turn it off now that I'm "old" (early forties?! :) )... yeah. I'm almost done with Michael Bader's book on male sexuality... kinda helps, kinda doesn't. Explains things well, I get why I do what I do and why she's not interested in me anymore, but no solutions or how to manage a normal version of male sexuality let alone a BP2 hypersexuality component, KWIM? None of it matters if she won't participate in trying to fix things between us. And my hyper aspect doesn't help me out at all. I feel trapped and too worthless to get untrapped. ugh.

I was writing a novel for a publisher who was going to pick it up... was based loosely on one of my first relationships, lots of sex and all that... and I was trying to figure out my current dilemma through the novel (fiction is like that), but then the publisher went belly up after I submitted the sample chapters and now I have to go through the whole process all over again of trying to sell it to someone new, while finishing the re-write and being miserable becuase it has dredged up a lot of stuff from my hypsersexual past... blech. Although that's helped make it less autobiographical. So in that sense hypersexuality is ostensibly going to help me get paid, if I can find another publisher of course.

I experience hypersexuality like a tidal surge that won't quit until it's expressed. The self-expression version, the only one I have had in many many years thanks to my mate's non-involvement, only works to curb the edge off the tsunami and only triggers depression because my need for intimacy is not being met anyway, ever. I'm touchy feely and she's not. I'm wracked to think of how or when that happened. But it's hell being isolated and alone and no touch, not even a non-sexual touch. It's like a deprivation tank all the time, but the tide of the urge never goes away.

Frankly hypersexuality... I wish it was a gift but I just don't feel it is for me, it's hell. Especially in a monastic-against-my-will marriage.

I'm worried about it too because my daugher is BP and she's going to hit it one of these years.... how the hell am I gonna explain this to her. Gee, nice Dad, gave her fucking BP and all the joys therein. No wonder my wife is "done" with sex, or maybe just with me, I can never tell, I stink at this game. Ugh, I didn't wanna talk about it, but I did. Now I just hate myself again. AND I feel exposed in the process. ;)

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Hey Jack?

I don't know how old your daughter is, and i do know how gross it feels to dredge up this bipolar shit and how painful it is to lay it out in front of other people, but- I really think you should just talk to her about it... I mean, at least as much of it as you can, cause talking about sex with your parents on any level is really hard and kinda embarassing...

but the reason I say this is only because I'm the daughter with BP which my dad suffers from as well... I've only recently opened up to my parents about it, and until I did, I had no clue my dad suffered from it as well. Not even an idea. but as I started to share with him what I was going through, he started letting me in on his world, and the experiences he had had with medication and psychiatrists and such... and I have to tell you, holy cow, did I ever learn about myself when that communication started to happen...

such basic things, like, family medical histories and health issues my parents faced, I didn't find out till I was 25... for some reason my family always felt like they had to hide their health and medical concerns. I mean, they felt like they had to hide everything, so I guess their health condition would just be part and parcel with that...

and yes, one of the things my dad struggled with badly through some difficult years was that he was social and extroverted and outgoing, and my mom was hard and antisocial and a little cold sometimes and it caused a lof of tension and frustration in their marriage...

happily though, they have since managed to achieve a healthy sex life again (that's as far as I let him go with that topic! ;) ) and I know it's taken them a LOT of work... but Im glad they got back there again...

as for me, I'm actually quite the opposite... yeah, I have those times, especially when I'm all manic and crap, where I wish prostitution was a predominantly male profession... :) but I didn't even lose my virginity till I was 18... I had like, no sex drive at all when I was a teenager... I couldn't be bothered, I was too busy doing drugs and hanging out with my druggy friends and trying to learn how to play the guitar while smoking drugs...

oooookaaaayy, I'm rambling now......

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wait, I skipped something in my last post related to this post...

in my early twenties, I had been dating a guy for almost two years, and it was right when the bulk and brunt of this illness was first coming on... I wanted sex like, every day and ten times a day... he only wanted it a few times a week... we almost broke up over it a few times... I felt that way for a couple of years, but it seems it was kind of a phase as my sex drive doesn't tend to be very high...

that is all....

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LITAJ, thanks. I value your experience. Being able to see how others deal with this is helpful to my own situation indeed.

My daughter's a mature 11 but this aspect of her BP hasn't shown up with regard to other people yet. We do see it in her when she self-soothes in her room (that took a lot of redirecting to get her to go into her own room instead of out in the open). Anyway, I'm going to keep that in mind... I have a lot of guilt things that I have to work on with regard to my genetics and my kids. I wasn't the only genetic contributor, her mom's side has BP everywhere so it was inevitable she'd get too much of a good thing. I often forget that and blame myself (the ole depression bent) too often.

I don't want to hijack the OP's threat with my lengthy post -- basically how I deal with my own hypersexuality is, I either don't or it's really difficult to deal with. When I'm not depressed or frustrated by it I can see how it's a gift in a way to be more sexually aware and "open"... human beings in the USA are way too sex-negative and puritanical; opening that up would be progress and BP people could be leading the way or at least helping to fuel it... maybe that's just the artist activist in me, but that's part of BP too in me. OTOH, the pain in the neck about HS is that it's really difficult to manage, more so when I feel mismatched. And the hell for me when I'm not depressed is that I adore my mate... always have. The downside is that I'm so tired of the unrequited love bullshit.

*sigh*

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wait, I skipped something in my last post related to this post...

in my early twenties, I had been dating a guy for almost two years, and it was right when the bulk and brunt of this illness was first coming on... I wanted sex like, every day and ten times a day... he only wanted it a few times a week... we almost broke up over it a few times... I felt that way for a couple of years, but it seems it was kind of a phase as my sex drive doesn't tend to be very high...

that is all....

Loved that! When I was younger I dated women who were like that and loved it, they always grew tired of me though, because I was so damned hyperfocused on the quality and variety of that frequent activity... I could go for days without a break, other than the physiological requirement anyway. and I was super passionate throughout which made younger women very tired.

So then I ran across this woman who gave me a spark but she didn't seem to have one from me... should have been the tip-off but I was blind and obeyed the fundie-conditioning I grew up with that says sex should be less than 10% of life or a relationship (W.T.F.?!). I followed my heart and 18 + years later, sexless despite my mammoth libido, how much is HS and how much is just "me" I have no way of knowing really... and I'm paying for it. I drives a lot of my derpression... it's where most of my triggers happen that drive me into the depression-trough of my cycle.

I hope this is helping, Vagabond... in a weird way it's probably helping me by talking "out loud" about something I've held back from everyone except my journals. (finding those after I'm dead is gonna really suck for family members...)

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Jack,

Do you have a therapist? It has to be very difficult. I can't imagine. Hypersexuality or it's opposite and the lack of intimacy you describe to my way of looking at it are not the same--at all.

My late husband died of lung cancer. For quite awhile we were unable to have sex because of chemo, other meds and him just feeling downright shitty. It's kind of hard to feel amorous when yer dyin'. But, he and I shared a bond, a level of intimacy that went FAR beyond sex. We were very, very, very close physically and on the level of soul. It's kind of hard to explain. It's REALLY hard to explain to the man I love now.

I guess my point is, I'm sorry your wife won't work with you on this. It sounds like she is missing out on something that could be really meaningful, outside of even the sexual part of your marriage. It's sad.

I hope you have someone IRL you can talk to.

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