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Oh, I suppose I might as well chime in, since it's already on the board somewhere or other, buried among other posts from nearly four years ago.

Who was your first experience with someone of the same sex with?

A guy I knew at a friend's party who I was sort of friends/acquaintances with. I don't remember where I originally knew him from, but I know he at various points in time has been roommates with people I know and has worked with others (which describes approximately half the population of Boston; somehow everyone I run into is friends with, has lived with, or has worked with half a dozen people I know, even just random people I run into on the street sometimes).

Was it planned or did it spontaneously happen?

We were hanging out on my friend's porch after most people had gone home or fallen asleep inside, and it somehow came up that I'd never had a girlfriend/boyfriend and had never even kissed anyone. He took it upon himself to fix it, and, well, he did.

Did you know they were gay/bi when it happened?

I did not, and I honestly still don't know if he is or was just fooling around. He was kind of friendlier towards me than usual that summer, but not overtly so, and it never went anywhere. I've never actually witnessed him do anything else non-platonic with anyone else or heard anything about him having a boyfriend/girlfriend/anything, so that gets a check in the NFC column.

Did you like it at the time or did it bother you?

Neither. It was somewhere between "well, that was that" and "well, that was awkward", for my own reasons unrelated to the specific situation. I was maybe 23-ish at the time, had never dated, and had never done anything else like that with anyone. I also had/have social anxiety like nobody's business, so my brain was too busy spazzing to really focus on anything that was actually happening. Screw the gay dating scene; dating at all, or even people in general intimidated me.

After that, I ended up with a girlfriend, completely unintentionally while not looking for one, which has worked out quite well for me. After she (im)patiently waited for several weeks for me to do a suitable amount of freaking out about stuff, I eventually sorted myself out and discovered that I am actually capable of doing things like that with another person, and I even like it.

I think the issue was that it's hard to fit several weeks' worth of becoming comfortable with an idea into the space of a few minutes on someone's porch. At this point in time, now that I've already gone through all that, it'd probably work out fine instead of being weird. However, it's also kind of irrelevant, because I'm happy with what I already have.

for some reason everything below a mans belt has always been attractive to me

I'm not quite sure what it is I want to say about that, but it involves a vague sense of agreement.

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-Who was your first experience with someone of the same sex with?

I was set up on a blind date with some other woman who was bi-curious

- Was it planned or did it spontaneously happen?

Not planned, so spontaneous, I guess

- Did you know they were gay/bi when it happened?

A mutual friend set us up because she knew I was definitely bi, and she was, well, bi=curious

- Did you like it at the time or did it bother you?

I didn't really like that she wanted to play in the sandbox, but not pick up the poop, as it were. She kissed like a fish but got my rocks off. So, meh, six of one etc etc

Now the threesome... that was WAY better... both male and female and me. *slightly evil grin*

I guess that might be a little more than you wanted to know. (definitely more than Mr. W wanted to know.)

Peace,

Wooster

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I have a memory like swiss cheese, I think the first girl I kissed was my best female friend. We were somewhere around 14-16 years old. We're both bi and we knew it at the time. I did it because she dared me to. Wasn't planned on my end, might have been planned on hers. I should ask her about that one day. It wasn't anything special - maybe kinda dangerous because we were in the girls bathroom at school. But we had no chemistry, which we still think is a shame because if we did we'd just get married and be done with the headache of dating. We're already stuck with each other (we've been friends since age 10 - which is 18 years now).

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I have done things with ine girl, it wasnt anything serious, I just left a guy and I was a little angry to say the least (he robbed an old lady at gun point and told me...I turned him in) well I knoew I was "interested" in same sex but I never told anyone....well one thing led to another. I have only told my fiance about this...no ne else. There are alot of homophobes that I know and people who think that it is a "mental illness" so I keep it to myself.

It happened 6 years ago, I was drunk and she was too. We were attracted to each other we just never spoke the words, we kissed and it went from there (yall know what happened) we were on my couch and well it was a long time ago. I do feel attracted to SOME women but I never vocalize it of course or say anything about it. Its just something that I am along with everything else, it isnt that I am ashamed its just I dont want people to start on me with that along with everything else, I already here about my MI on a daily basis, I dont want tht to constantly come up too.

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I have only told my fiance about this...no ne else. There are alot of homophobes that I know and people who think that it is a "mental illness" so I keep it to myself.

[...]

I do feel attracted to SOME women but I never vocalize it of course or say anything about it. Its just something that I am along with everything else, it isnt that I am ashamed its just I dont want people to start on me with that along with everything else, I already here about my MI on a daily basis, I dont want tht to constantly come up too.

That's very different from my experience. I don't generally bring it up unless it's relevant to the conversation already going on, but if anyone asks, I have no problem talking about it, and I've never, ever had anything negative happen because of it. Of course, I do live in Boston, which probably helps, and the kind of people I hang out with don't make a big deal out of it or even about being crazy. I guess my situation must be kind of unusual. That's kind of sad (for other people who it's not like that for).

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It isnt so much the city as it is the people I know, I mean there are homophobes every where but we also do have a large/strong gay community. It is just my "dirty litle secret" per say. I dont know what peoples problems are but I know a lot of people who say that it is a mental illness, or a DNA malfunction or something, it is ridiculous, but these are the same types who think that vibrators are icky and masturbation will make you go blind or get hairy palms. This is a ROman catholic sommunity and they are way stricter than most normal people, it just how things are around here...I am frowned upon because I dont go to church or bible study ;)

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That's so different from what I'm used to. It seems like since at least high school, pretty much everyone I know has either been completely non-religious or has kept whatever they do happen to believe in/do to themselves, so I basically don't encounter that in my own life. They're also all either very open-minded about sexuality in general, or at least very tolerant. About other stuff, too, like crazy people. I don't really know how I found so many people like that, but they're neat. I like them. Sorry some people suck.

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They're also all either very open-minded about sexuality in general, or at least very tolerant. About other stuff, too, like crazy people. I don't really know how I found so many people like that, but they're neat.

Same here actually. Nobody really gives a crap about sexuality or crazyness. It may be a location thing. I'm in a surburb of NY and I come across very few people who get worked up about things like that.

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