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i feel like im going back down into the pit of despair. i can feel it in my gut, in my chest. its heavy. its a dark cloud rolling in. i have no friends IRL, nobody IRL needs me, wants me, or cares about me, except my parents, which is expected. i don;t know why im feeling like this, i was feeling good the past week. why do i have to go down when im up? i hate depression. i hate bp.

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carmex, i'm sorry.

I know it's disappointing when you feel ok and then things go down again, but it's natural. You are making some really good steps towards getting better, you will have good days and bad days.

Hoping tomorrow will be better for you.

PS I noticed your blog said yesterday that you were feeling fast, and your sig says BP rapid cycling- do you think instead of 'good' yesterday you were manic?

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