Dirk McQuickly Posted July 31, 2005 Share Posted July 31, 2005 Hello all-- I haven't been actually diagnosed but according to what I can gather I seem to have Atypical Depression. I'm 43 and live in central South Carolina. My wife passed away in 2000 and then our house burned down in 2004. A failed relationship last year also occurred, even changing my fundamental initial assessment of people from one of trust to one of initial distrust. Clearly, I have valid reasons to be depressed. What I don't have are valid reasons for coping with things so poorly-- I have no energy; anhedonia, no motivation. Perhaps worst of all is my sheer dread of rejection. I used to ascribe all of this to widowhood. But I know plenty of widows who've gone through a suitable period of grief, then picked up and gone on with their lives. I seem unable to do that. I constantly think to myself, Why bother trying? I'm going to fail anyway. The feeling of hopelessness swings back and forth with feelings of anger and bitterness. So reluctantly I'm seeking help. I have an appointment later this week with a therapist. Maybe I can get all drugged up and not need women anymore. Maybe I can take something that'll make me slow and stupid and take away all my desires and make me happy with my underemployment and my lot in life. I'm only half joking. But hopefully the problem will be approached from both the cognitive and the pharmacological angle. There're a couple of local support groups here; I've been to one meeting already and met some nice people, in the same boat as me. Anyway, it's nice to meet all of you too and I look forward to learning here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.