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I go to a DBSA group thing every Saturday, and there's this one girl that is pretty attractive. I don't know if she's lesbian or not, i don't know if she finds me attractive or not. she's so nice, though! im so unfamiliar with MI and dating, do I just ask her to go out for coffee or wait until I see a sign that she might be interested too?

I haven't told anyone this, hopefully this girl doesn't go to these boards...

Hoping to hear your sound advice,

carmex

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Nice one, carm ;) I think what I'd do is sort of hint about gay things and see if she responds. Like, talk about something gay. If she's gay, she'll probably know you're trying to come out to her, and then she might guess you're interested, and you can see what she does. I'd think of something more specific, but my brain feels like it's made of swiss cheese today.

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is asking for her email address too over the top? she was going to give it to me one time, coz i was planning to start a group here in my town but she doesnt live in the area so i didnt take it. she's always on the manic side so i don't want to take advantage of that...

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I guess it depends how well you already know her? FWIW, I'm pretty functionally asexual at the moment, so I could be totally talking out of my ass. I just know that a lot of people I know like to check if someone's gay before they do anything.

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ack, i really don't know, either. i did ask her specifically to come back on saturday, so if she's there ill take it as one good sign. ill just take it slow anyway, im not in a hurry to get married. i just feel good about it though. if i was going to pick a partner, itd be someone with some flavor of MI, just so she could empathize and vice versa. ill keep you guys updated though. i might see her thursday too. thanks for the tip, tryp... ill try to think of something to say to her to see if she's in our club or not...

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Well, I don't know anything about dating etiquette, let alone gay dating etiquette, but keep in mind it's a mental health support group. It's not singles night. Some people at support groups don't want their privacy invaded, or don't want to deal with people hunting for a relationship. Some people are made uncomfortable by that kind of attention. So be careful.

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