Do people stare at you sometimes?

[Kablume]

I just hate when I have to go in public and I feel as if people are staring at me. Do I look that funny, am I oozing alien juice? Sometimes I feel as if I should tattoo mentally interesting person here. But I do not have that big of a forehead.

Does anyone else fell this way? What do you do about it?

Thanks for looking at the post.

[soulshards]

hey kablume,

I get stared at if I'm feeling happy and confident. Probably because I dont have that "stay the hell out of my way" look on my face! (see avatar. dead ringer.)

Or, it could be because I really look insane! I dont know. Sometimes I have delusions that I am semi good looking when I'm happy.  I think I'll go with that one. Do you think you're pretty? have you been told you are?

but most of the time ppl just flat out ignore me almost running me over with their car or shopping cart.

forgot to add "what to do about it"

now? nothing. I don't care anymore.  I used to be self conscious. now I just dont have the time.

[GroovyGwen]

guys look at my tits.  Does that count? 

A (male) friend of mine noticed that a woman totally looked me up and down with a bitchy look on her face.  I was actually looking at her and thinking that I liked her skirt, so maybe she noticed me looking at her and so she looked at me?  Who knows.  When I am down and/or anxious aggression I wear a hat so people won't look at me.  But then I think people are looking at the hat.  If I am really freaking out, then people looking at me will cause me to lose it.  Paranoia.

"You lookin' at me?  Are you lookin' at me?  There's no one else in here so you must be lookin' at me..."

Mua ha ha. 

[Guest Guest_stipple_*]

  i get stares of disbelief,pity and hatred from neocons.To annoy the peons even more try skipping which is a lost art.

Where i live people are so engrossed in thier cell phone call that thier eyes are glazed over,they would only stare if some celebrity dingdong was riding a scooter naked.

    Get used to being stared at      its fun waking up the people who think they have thier stuff together like robots.     

[Greenyflower]

This is embarrassing. I sing to myself. I talk to myself. Sometimes I slip up and it's out loud without me realizing it. But now that cell phones and iPods have those little one ear headphones and lots of people walk down the street talking and singing to no one, I don't get as many odd looks. I love technology.

Greeny

[GroovyGwen]

Greeny - I sing and talk to myself all the time.  Especially when shopping by myself.  ("Wow, those pants are ugly" - "I wonder if that would look ok on my fat ass?")  I don't even notice most of the time.  People do sometimes look at me like I am crazy.  And maybe I am. 

[synthetic]

Do you think you're pretty?

If you get far enough away, I am quite handsome.

When I start getting paranoid about people staring at be I usually just get really anxious and uncomfortable.  But you were probably looking for positive coping mechanisms.  Sorry.

[Kablume]

Do I think I'm pretty? I don't think I'm ugly. Does that count?

People staring at me, I thought it was a Michigan thing. I guess I do look a little strange at times. I do sing and talk to myself. I try hard as hell not to talk to myself in public. I am starting to answer myself at home. Hell, who else is going to keep me company during the day?

[Guest Guest_soulshards_*]

talking and singing..yea, that could be it! I have to admit I immediately look at someone when they are talking. and singing even more so.  not because I think they're nuts, I just hear absolutely everything and check it out.  I grew up in a quiet household and live basically alone (except for baby, his every little noise drives me up the wall.)

[Ella]

I love to hear people singing to themselves in public (especially if they're good!).  They always look and sound the way I want to feel: happy and care-free.  It cheers me right up.

I am starting to answer myself at home. Hell, who else is going to keep me company during the day?

I do this too!  I also comment aloud in public, though I try to keep it to a minimum to avoid the stares of strangers.  Nah, I don't have "recluse" etched on my forehead in neon colors!  Haven't yet taken to holding conversations with inanimate objects, though.

If I am really freaking out, then people looking at me will cause me to lose it.  Paranoia.

Ideally I'd own an invisibility suit so I could move about freely without having to worry about being looked at.  I'm always thinking I must look very anxious since that's how I feel (am I making weird faces?  am I blushing?  surely they can see I'm perspiring, etc.).

[syncope]

Ideally I'd own an invisibility suit so I could move about freely without having to worry about being looked at.

[flutterfly]

hey sweets...YEP YOU BETCHA THEY DO!!! i have tunnel vision when i go out in public but if i look around...yep people stare n i tell myself that they're just tryin' to figure out if it's me or my twin!!! my hubby says well of course they're lookin' cause your a little hottie...but for me i feel all awkward n try not to make eye contact.

i for one think they were never told it's not polite to stare!!!! 

good luck

flutterfly

[pacanuck]

People stare at me in public too, as I occasionally have to cover my ears because I cannot stand mechanical/screaching/repititious/attention-getting noises.

I look like a 4 year old in the middle of a fire alarm drill.

There I am...a grown 37 year old woman running around looking for the door (or somewhere to hide) to do anythig to get away from the noise.

But, I don't care.  There's nothing I can do about it (right now anyway).

I saw my pdoc last week and told him about this.

The good thing is (if you can see it as being good) in the waiting room,

there was this woman....who had this voice....and she complained...about being only 10 minutes late for an appt. (she was actually 25 mins late) and no one would see her.....she whined...and whined...getting louder...and louder...and whinier (is that even a word?)...and my skin started to crawl...my hands are over my ears...I get up...I'm going to leave when I finally can go into the office.

The pdoc just looks at me with a "wtf" expression on his face.

He would never verbalize this, as he is a very nice, quietish, older, calm, Egyptian man - I think he's cool.

Let them look.  What can ya do? 

[C@scratch]

One time I was sitiing at a bus stop and this guy came up to me and said "you look so sad. It can't be that bad" WTF? I hadn't even started in on my MI journey. And it was just a bus!

That one still cracks me up.

[itsme]

seems like everyone is watching someone.........what are they thinking?

doomed i walk with uncontrolled arm jerking and remember not to hit folk with my walking stick if they get too close .Oh and then i swear like a trooper at me for being so dumb as to have left the house in the first place.........i then reply to my observant cussing and sometimes add a clout to my head.Tis all over in 'my time' very quickly but yep! i get stared at alot............and listened to.........but if you do all of this and are pretty i think they would still suspect nutter on the loose......have had aisles in supermarket part like the red sea when i haven't even opened my mouth...........can they see what it is we are doing in our heads?

^

the bus stop...............bummer start to a day but made me laugh..happened to me once.....did you give him an appropriate response???? i said 'it will get worse'....stopped him looking at me!

[C@scratch]

I was so stunned I said nothing while he walked away. Maybe he thought it was his good deed of the day.

I like your response better!

Really. What are we thinking.

I feel like I'm invisable. I even try to smile and be nice and I get no response. Maybe they think I'm staring at them! Ack.

[GroovyGwen]

Strangers who are trying to be helpful bug me.  When I am bad, i need people NOT to talk to me or I will wig.  People have done the whole "Why don't you smile? It can't be that bad" thing and it is mostly men and I doubt their true intentions.  Usually I can fake it pretty well in public but it is tiring.  Like work.  The people who ask where I've been lately or why I've been down or why I'm so quiet really bug me.  I just want to hide in my office to avoid the dang questions, but that brings MORE question.  Ugh.

I gotta say - I think I stare at people.  Sometimes I am zoning out and sometimes I am being judgemental and criticizing them.  Or I am trying to see inside their heads at what they are thinking.  I don't even notice it most of the time.  I think I do it more with women than men, too.  Bad Gwen. 

[SnaiLuv]

I get stared at. but i look wierd, and i like it that way because it muddies the waters enough, therefore i can deal with it. they could be staring because I'm pretty, because i look wierd, or because i keep flapping my hands all over the place. and it's okay.

[HyperInHell]

I used to get stared at for all of my facial piercings and bright colored hair. Now I have "toned down" my image, but I still get stared at because I walk funny. I just tell the idiots to fuck off or stare back even harder.

[Velvet Elvis]

FWIW, an irrational fear of people staring at you behind your back can be a symptom of social anxiety disorder.  If it's bad enough that you avoid crowds and that kind of thing it's worth looking into getting it treated.

People probobly stare at me, but I'm funny looking.

[checkerboards]

I get stared at on occasion. Most of the time, I'm happy to be safely under everyone's radar.

Oh, and apparently I sit unnaturally still, because in the past year two different people have mentioned to me that until I turned to look at them, they thought I was a statue/mannequin. That's always fun.

[Seldarin]

I get stared at all the time.

It's a redneck 'Hey, he's different from us' thing.

At least I used to think so.

I think normal people are just 'starey' (Is that a word? Probably not.) everywhere.

They stare at each other too.

I tend to not look at anyone unless I have to or I'm pretty pissed.

Then again I also tend to avoid going out in public if I can avoid it.

Either way, I can't gripe about being stared at. As much ink/holes as I've put/poked in my body, I could draw attention anywhere. That's not why it was done, just a stupid by-product.

[wifezilla]

People stare at me because I am so damn tall. Kind of hard to miss...unless you are a sales person whos attention I am trying to get. Then I am (apparently) invisible. Good thing I am loud so I can scream "HEY! I AM TRYING TO SPEND SOME MONEY HERE! WOULD YOU MIND HANGING UP THE PHONE WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND AND HELP ME? BETTER YET, JUST CALL YOUR MANAGER FOR ME HUN!" (I am so subtle.)

I think when I hit late 30's I stopped caring and began smiling back at people who are obviously staring. Surprisingly, I get a lot of smiles back.

[Ruby]

I had one woman tell me"you don't look as good as u think" (mind u i'd not said one word to her) . Hope there are more posts. This is a very interesting

[~nestling~]

I get paranoid

As I said to my psychiatrist, if you'd been bullied for 10 years at school, and lived with a paranoid father, you'd be paranoid too.

I am only 5 foot tall.

People stare, I've especially noticed recently. Or perhaps they only glance at me, but even that is too much....I try and pull my hair over my face because to feel all the long repressed anger and hatred and violence would be dangerous.

People usually only stare when they see my anxious/neurotic/panicky moments.

It doesn't help when I'm feeling really ugly.....

[Boz-pot]

I often stared at, mainly I think because I have a tendancy to dress a little eccentrically (I love bright clothes, braces, ties, fun jewellery etc.) Recently people keep asking me why I have a little metal mesh tea ball pinned to my jacket. Either that or they say, in a slightly patronising tone of voice "Is it so that you can make a cup of tea when you feel like it?". The truth is, I wear it because I think it's pretty. When they ask, my answer is "Because I don't have a pocket watch". That usually shuts them up...I wish I did have a pocket watch.

Today has been unbearably hot and sunny in my opinion, so, like any sensible freak (!) I put my umbrella up to keep the sun off as I burn easily. This gets more comments than the tea ball. I've even had people asking me if I realised it wasn't raining - I don't think I'm THAT crazy! It seems completely logical to me to use my umbrella as a parasol. Some people have no imagination.

Umbrellas are also a great excuse if you're trying to avoid eye contact.

[Lily]

Boz-pot, come, come to Japan, where people still carry sun parasols. No one gives them a second look, unless (erm) they are clearly using a regular rain umbrella as a parasol, but who cares? It's cooler under there.

lily

[null0trooper]

Today has been unbearably hot and sunny in my opinion, so, like any sensible freak (!) I put my umbrella up to keep the sun off as I burn easily. This gets more comments than the tea ball. I've even had people asking me if I realised it wasn't raining - I don't think I'm THAT crazy! It seems completely logical to me to use my umbrella as a parasol. Some people have no imagination.

It's not common, but not unknown, to see parasols or umbrellas used as parasols in southern Florida.

Given the choice between being stared at or developing malignant melanoma? Maybe I'd send flowers

while the judgmental goobs are in the hospital having their leathery skin stitched back together. Maybe

goldenrod... that's a pretty color...

[celestia]

I often stared at, mainly I think because I have a tendancy to dress a little eccentrically (I love bright clothes, braces, ties, fun jewellery etc.) Recently people keep asking me why I have a little metal mesh tea ball pinned to my jacket. Either that or they say, in a slightly patronising tone of voice "Is it so that you can make a cup of tea when you feel like it?". The truth is, I wear it because I think it's pretty. When they ask, my answer is "Because I don't have a pocket watch". That usually shuts them up...I wish I did have a pocket watch.

tell them it's your "beem me up thingee" to the mother ship...

The older I get (middle 40s) the more *invisible* I become to the rest of the numb nuts running around out there, which is just fine with me. sometimes I'm moved to strike a conversation, but typically with older people. Way more interesting to just shoot the shit with.

S9

[Boz-pot]

My mother said exactly the same thing (she's 58). Although it seems to please you, I think it's a great shame that once people - particularly women - get past a certain age, they are virtually ignored.

[ncc1701]

Heya,

I talk to myself all the time.

At work, the staff are used to it and to be honest, half of them do it too.

(Maybe this says something interesting about medical personnel??)

And I agree, Greeny, I even wear my Muvo when it's not on, b/c people seem to not care if you have an earphone of some kind.

Plus, as my mom says, gotta have an intelligent conversation once in a while.

--ncc--

This is embarrassing. I sing to myself. I talk to myself. Sometimes I slip up and it's out loud without me realizing it. But now that cell phones and iPods have those little one ear headphones and lots of people walk down the street talking and singing to no one, I don't get as many odd looks. I love technology.

Greeny

[Boz-pot]

I think the vast majority of people talk to themselves but most of them are to embarrassed to admit it because of all this "First sign of madness" shit.

[jen5276]

Gwen - I totally emphathize with the whole work thing..can't stand it when people are asking me what is wrong, etc. at work, etc. I have my good days and I bad days, and in between days, and on the bad and in between days I usually don't want to deal with anyone's bs...So that is why I am quiet! LOL But I can't just come out and say that so I usually just say "Nothing, just tired," and smile, hoping that they will go away.. Ugh, I wish I could work from home so I didn't have to deal with all these stupid office politics...

[lilie]

when people are being nice they say it's because I have pretty eyes. other people have told me its because sometimes I can look "wild-eyed, kind of intense" I'm not even aware I'm doing it. My eyes are really, really dark, not brown but black so I guess if I'm thinking to myself or just zoning I guess I can look wild eyed. who knows?

lilie

[Boz-pot]

I talk to myself a lot too. Often it's due to fact that I will inadvertantly say whatever is in my head at the time. It usually happenes when I'm out on my own somewhere and my overactive brain won't shut up.

[vunja]

I get stared at all the time. I've come up with a few reasons for this. the foremost is that I wear all black because it makes me feel safe. ("zomg she's a fucking GOTH, mommy!") when I tend to be out in public, I tend to be either with my crazy (not MI, just crazy) friend and we're doing something stupid like "skipping into the sunset" together through the mall, or I'm with my other friend who's in a wheelchair. people seem to have a problem with able-bodied and disabled people hanging out together. also, I've been told several times that I have a "fuck-off and leave me alone" expression on my face almost always, so. I'm very proud of these aspects, though, so I don't mind the stares.

I also tend to stare back. the whole all-black coupled with the scary expression thing tends to freak people out.

sometimes, just to mess with people, I'll stare at "normal" people. people who aren't talking to themselves or who don't wear eccentric clothing and stuff like that, and it's funny. they're just like -- wtf? it's great. of course, I'd feel bad if someone sociophobic MI were looking normal in a crowd and I freaked them out, but. it's funny to mess with people's minds.

[Loon-A-TiK]

i'm not trying to be conceited, but i am a pretty woman. so i do get my share of guys checking me out and women giving me disgusted/jealous looks.

as for looking at me because i'm a fruitloop-

i get that sometimes. sometimes i burst into tears in public, and people think someone in the family died, so i get hugs from strangers (very weird). sometimes i talk wa y too fast, or stare at the food in the frozen section for about an hour trying to decide what to buy (yet the SSA doesn't think i need SSDI).

somewhere in all this, people who stare may just be confused, after all, we can be a bit off sometimes!

once in the hospital waiting room i was wailing and crying, and the lady across from me came over to console me. i told her i'm BP and she zoomed away, and told the lady sitting next to her. i shouted HEAVEN FORBID, and started screaming my favorite bad words. they took me into triage after that! lol

'

[merryfolk]

I did read somewhere that people who talk to themselves are highly creative. There's a confidence booster for you.

[Guest espressogrrl]

I died my hair bright FUCKING fireengine red.

To the point where small children break from their mothers hands and walk towards me saying" look mommy, at her hair!!"

Now it's easy to tell myself they are looking at that instead being paranoid its anything else