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Ok I feel really stupid first of all since I have been diagnosed Bipolar one for thirty years (also Socially phobic, PTSD, incest survivor and feel that I should perhaps have known better. first thanks for being here, I am now living in a Spanish speaking country feeling very isolated and depressed with no one to talk with an no where to go... so it is good to have somewhere to vent..

Please first, don't yell at me, since I simply do not have the options that some of you have. Could not afford to be in the States anyway, lived there for years without insurance and after 25 years of lithium ,,, when my hair fell out, turned gray, gained 100 pounds and just got stupid... was not really even able to start the real work on recovery from incest etc until I got off lithium unto depakote then topamax...

then from topamax to the high vitamins from true hope which really kept me ok stable along with a good regime of watching myself, my sleep, my diet, keeping my interactions with people very limited. etc.

now i am lucky since I have family money which is locked up so that I get a monthly check which is enough for me to live here... not well in the States but here I do ok.. and I am a kind and friendly person for the most part.... people like me,....

I have managed to successfully relocate here, make a few friends,do some writing, so I am pretty proud of that...

but the reality of my life is that I isolate spend 12 to 14 hours on my computer.....

I did just start back up on meds about three weeks ago (topamax which has worked well for me)so they should be kicking in soon) I am not suicidal, just depressed

Since I was pretty much off meds for five years, and only had one brush with hypomania in the time, was able to control it with Zyprexa (I can buy most psych meds here over the counter)...

i have had free lance work here as a journalist and am trying a bit to reinvent myself and get more energy to write more.... get connected more

i am just so lonely

i need to connect with some people that i can talk with

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While I don't believe in vitamins as a cure for everything, there have to be some decent (or even great) psychiatrists in just about any country, and "fancy" meds should be cheaper where you are. (I just hope you don't live in too rural an area).

It sounds like you're doing fairly well, aside for the loneliness and feeling isolated, but a good therapist would likely be able to help you with some of your bigger and smaller problems.

Anyway, welcome to the community! I hope you find it helpful. ;)

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thanks to both of you... yes, I am in the Capital and am actually friends with the one therapist who is certified by the US Embassy... so what help there is there I am getting... I have been here before I know that it will pass.

It is just the price one pays for going off meds in the first place, really. And for not recognizing the hypomania for what it was. I was very lucky that it was not worse, really. And I aluching that this is not worse.

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Welcome to CB!

I've not lived out of my home country for an extended period of time before, but I am familiar with being geographically isolated from "my people," so to speak. So, I can relate to at least some of the loneliness you're feeling. I've found that the community here helps me to feel a little less alone. I hope you can find as much help and support here as I have.

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Hi Manatee.

Wow, only vitamins for 5 years? I couldn't imagine that. What vitamins were you on? Was it a very strict regime with diet? Were you stable that whole time? oh sorry... you did mention one bout with hypomania. Sorry for all the questions, just find it interesting that you could have stability for that long without meds.

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