On a small dose Abilify, and now nightly mental chatter is back full swing

[LilacOutsideMyWindow]

So, Abilify at 2.5mg nightly. Still makes me need to get to bed w/in an hour of taking it. Unfortunately, for the past 3 nights, my nightly romp in my head is going strong. At the same time, I'm too dizzy and sedated to get up and DO anything to help make my mind stop.

On the up side, I no longer have any desire to SI, and the mental chatter is just bs stuff - like what am I taking to the potluck tonight (the food is already cooked and ready, go to sleep) what am getting the kids for cmas, when can I shop for it, what should my next knitting project be....AHHH! It's 2am, let me sleep already!

This is just how it has been off and on all my life, but at first, 11 days ago, the Abilify had me sleeping so much more soundly! I tried 5mg for 2 days, but the shaky, twitchy got to me and a call to pdoc had me back down to 2.5mg.

I do see her on Tues, but what do you all think? Is there something that is better at shutting up the mental chatter? Is that what I ask for, something to let my mind sleep?

ETA crap, posted this in wrong forum, mods my apologies.

[SashaSue]

2.5mg is a pretty low dose. It's not so surprising that you're still experiencing symptoms at that dosage. If you're unable to tolerate a higher dosage, you're probably better off trying a different med. I don't know what else you've tried, so it's hard to know what other options might work best for you.

[Guest]

If it's just mental chatter as opposed to voices/delusions then you may want to look into mindfulness meditation techniques that can help you deal with this without the need of a higher dose.

[Anna]

Abilify can be activating. You may want to look at some of the less activating AAPs, if you haven't tried them. Seroquel springs immediately to mind.

Anna

[LilacOutsideMyWindow]

Thanks all.

With my diagnosis being just 11 days old, Abilify is so far the only med I've tried (not counting all the things I've tried on my own prior to dx, but those weren't Rx). I guess this is just my first stop on the med-go-round. How I did not want to be on it. I wanted the first med to work dangit! (I'm sure everyone does, forgive my pity party)

I would love to use mindfulness, but lately when I try, I seem to send myself in a fast downward spiral that lastly ended w/urge to self harm and the first visit to pdoc. Not sure why it's not working, but I'd guess it's because I'm not stable, but trying to talk myself "out" just is bad right now. Hopefully one day.

[LilacOutsideMyWindow]

Just so you know what I"m talking about, when I tried to just be mindful of my breathing, a few weeks ago, it went something like this:

Ok, feel the breath on my upper lip from my nose.

Air moving in both directions across my upper lip...what is the dog doing?

Air moving...I haven't had a shower in 2 days

Air moving...I snapped at my kids again - hey, stop that! I'm being mindful here!

Ok, feel the breath.. should at least get up and do a load of laundry, you worthless- NO! stop that, not going there

Extra deep breath, feel the air...feel the failure. I'm a failure. What was that song my mom used to sing? You are U G LY ugly, D U M B dumb - I should just carve those words in my skin, let the world know that I know I'm both.

And then I screamed into a pillow, started crying hysterically, called my dh to come home NOW and thankfully never got near a sharp object. So, no mindfulness attempts from me until I think I can think louder than that "other" me voice. And it was that one that kept me up last night w/stupid lists of what needs to be done before the holidays.

[LilacOutsideMyWindow]

Just to update, pdoc has added Cogentin to get over the shakies, and I'm upping Abilify to 5mg again, w/1-2mg of Cogentin as needed.

Hopefully this will work!

[netsavy006]

Good luck with the new mixture.