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I'm NOT suicidal. but i cant really see why!


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I started being depressed for some hours a day like 3 weeks ago and it has progressed to be more hours of the day and since 3 days i'm depressed 24/7. despite being put on wellbutrtin since 2 weeks. (or maybe BECAUSE of being put on Wellbutrin? who knows)

i cant really imagine that one can have depressions worse than what i have right now really. seriously. SERIOUSLY

the interesting part is i have no thoughts of suicide what so ever! maybe i'm too lethargic or basicly retarded (not like having a low iq. i'm talking about psychomotor retardation) to think really of doing any fucking thing including suicide.

tried to take a nap out of my miserable life and it didnt really worked.

the reason for me being so anti sucide might be that my grandpa commited suicide and i saw how much pain this shit can couse to the members of family. dont know.

i seriously dont know what to do. i'm also not really expecting any replies because you most probably cant help me. but if you want to reply go for it :);)

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When do you see your doctor next? Maybe the WB is not for you? Can you call for other options?

I agree that there is a hellishness of depression where even the thought of suicide is overwhelming. You sound pretty bad. I would contact the doc.

Anna

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I doubt the WB is making you worse, since the depression had begun before you started it. I totally agree with Anna that you should get in touch with your pdoc asap, and see about the possibilities of either increasing the WB, or trying a different AD.

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first of all my depression or whatever it was, i cant really put my finger on it. it could as well be a very wierd mixed state or some flavour of psychosis.

anyways. now i feel quite a lot better. it could as well be a one-time thing. i've even already forgot how bad it was but reading my own post alarms me big time.

my memory sucks really badly when it comes to remembering moods. so i could go to my doc tomorrow but i will not be able to tell him how bad i felt today. i would be there giggling or something and say yesterday was quite hairy but it's gone now and it wasnt that bad HEEHEE. ;)

btw i have an apointment with a therapist tomorrow. it's the first time i'm going to him so i dont think it will help much.

do you think i should go to my pdoc tomorrow? he's quite picky about showing up without an appointment.

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I have spent a great deal of my life too depressed to move, but not actually suicidal. In fact, I would say I only really ever felt truly suicidal, as in really should have been hospitalized, but for my prick of a p-doc, once in my life. And this in spite of spending most of my 20s and early 30s continuously depressed.

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