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Severely and deeply depressed


Guest JustExisting

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Guest JustExisting

Hello,

I am so sick of feeling this deep deep depression. I have had it for about 10 years now but am just really starting to address the symtoms. I can't work right now it is so bad. I can't even get out of bed. For what? What is there to live for when nothing is pleasurable. I can't seem to find anybody with severe deep depression. Maybe because they are all inside, cooped up with no motivation to do anything. It makes me feel so alone. I stopped going to see people and friends because I think no one will understand me. I get bored to death but have no motivation to do anything. after I go through all the SSRI's and the SSNI's I am going to want to try Maois. I am so very resistant to these meds...but not the side effects...of course I get everyone of those.

The worst part is waiting for the medication to take effect. It's all a hellish waiting game. I want to scream and bark at people while I sulk in my own misery. I hate everything. I feel good to be on this site...to know that other people suffer from this disease. Ok well thanks for reading this. Just preying I don't have to live my life pissed off and depressed. Any thoughts?

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yes. I am in your boat. severe deep depression. in my case it's been 25 years. not all of them bad, when the meds worked i had 3 or 4 very good years. whether i am paying now for those happy years now i am not sure. it is my opinion that the huge profits lilly and others have been allowed to suck out of us is a big part of the problem. instead of continuing research to get closer to the chemical answer to our depression nightmares, all the companies elected to produce copycat prozacs (no investment in research) for the big payoff. there needs to be a cap on drug costs to consumers.

In the meantime we can hope that research will find new answers, medical establishment rigidity and corruption will be addressed, etc.

We can help ourselves by rejecting the drug companies' promises and exploring alternative therapies of which there are many. I don't think there will ever be a pill to solve the entire problem we face but I know there is the potential for more effective drugs. So be patient about the medicine and do your damndest to search out every little thing you can do on your own to relieve your suffering.

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Well, there's me and declaude, so far! (we don't want this to be too big a club, really, even if misery does like a bit of company.)

Again a 25 year history for me, running through the SSRI's Tricyclics, MOAI's, Lithium, Venlafaxine etc.

Also tried chinese herbalism and acupuncture as well as had various talking therapies.

I'm currently being referred for possible ECT. I think I'm ready for it, in lieu of any better suggestion we haven't actually tried.

"when nothing is pleasurable" is indeed a marker. Anhedonia, formally. "Nothing tastes" as Marie Antoinette put it.

And yes, it is terrible when friends become a problem because putting on a good face for them is a massive effort, and showing how you really feel hurts or offends them:

especially if they don't understand, or offer easy fixes that don't even scratch the surface.

No, I don't have great answers, but I'm fighting on for now.

For a range of largely intellectual reasons. And because a baked spud with chili still tastes good.

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It's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I think that there can be help from medicines if you have a really good pdoc who is willing to try different combinations of drugs. It is rare that just one antidepressant will do the trick and snap you out of a depression of many years.

And when the meds lift the gloom a little bit, the patient has to take action on his/her own behalf: exercise, eating good food, making an effort to not stay in bed all day.

I have heard of ECT helping people with long-term depression.

Anyway, keep writing. Somehow it feels better to be miserable in the company of other miserable people.

olga

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I do understand you; I can't say I've been severely depressed for 10 straight years, but I have experienced that where you can't experience pleasure, you don't feel motivated, you get bored cause all you do is lie around feeling miserable. Pristiq worked really well for me. Have you tried that? It seems to be side effect free, except for some thirst the first day or so. I know that all medications work differently for different people, but I go on this one med rating site and it seems to get really good reviews. I'm sorry for what you're going through; I hope you find a medicine that's right for you.

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i've been depressed since early childhood. i think i had a few randomly okay years and one odd year of being on top of the world... but overall it's been the pits.

you're not alone in the way you feel. it's hard to connect with people when you feel like shit and the other people who might know how you feel aren't out and about but sitting at home feeling like you! if you do run across someone who might feel the same it's most likely you won't know it. we don't walk around with ID bracelets so we can be fairly inconspicuous. personally i try to hide mine. just about eveyone i've ever known has no clue the extent of my depression.

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I wasn't where you are now as long, but I was someplace pretty close for year or two. And have always been a bit off until meds. I've been lucky with them, and I hope you will be too. I hope that, although it probably seems like forever, you're giving the meds 6 or 8 weeks to work, as apparently it sometimes takes that long.

declaude:

I don't know, perhaps the drug companies ARE taking a rest, but there is some research going on. I was at a presentation at MGH where they were anticipating some new meds in the next few years. (And studying them too, if I recall correctly.) One thing I've been reading about is called something like transcranial magnetic stimulation. Apparently it's not very traumatic and doesn't involve a seizure. They got the idea because they were doing brain MRI's on depressed people and some came out of the machine smiling. Unlike with an MRI, they just put this little coil thing on your head.

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