Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

The magnitude is crushing


Recommended Posts

I know my niggling little struggles with mental dysfunction are a charming Edwardian picnic compared to the lives of those fleeing New Orleans right now, and I utterly do not want to whine, but that said...

The news from the coast is pulling me deeper (who knew this was possible) beneath the whale dung down here in the Abyss.  I feel helpless, threatened, hopeless, useless, anxious, and sad, sad, sad.  I don't have extra money to donate, I don't have any useful skills to help, and I'm no longer convinced that prayer does any good.

And all this so close together

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i know how you feel Cerberus.  i had the same gutwrenching feeling in the days and weeks after 9/11 when everything was in chaotic confusion and all those families were left with gaping holes in them.  i've been watching some of the CNN coverage and i can't believe how things just keep getting worse and worse by the minute down in louisiana and mississippi.  i feel so helpless.  i can't help directly because i'm broke and live way up here in the north.  don't give up on prayer though.  even though it's hard to see the results, there is someone up there listening.  i'm convinced of that.  if that's all you and i can do, then at least we can do that.

i did hear about the bridge stampede in baghdad.  my stomach really turned when i saw all the hundreds of pairs of shoes that were taken off by the shiite worshippers before the confusion hit.  it's so hard to understand why these things keep happening.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I believe in collective consciousness to a certain degree.  I certainly feel the way you do, Cerebrus when it seems like the whole world is helplessly being stepped on all at once.

I like to meditate and imagine myself sending solace to these people.  They do need food and doctors more than solace, but it's all I can do.  All I have is energy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There are some events whose scope is just too overwhelming and horrifying to grasp. Depression exponentially magnifies my own feelings of helplessness, hopelessness and inadequacy in the face of them.

At the beginning of this year, the combination of thehugeness of the tsunami devastation coupled with the random horror of the guy in Malibu who went to the store to get ice cream for his family, was gone no more than 20 minutes, and came home to find his home and family buried under an entire hillside of mud... well, I just sat there sobbing. I cancelled two newspapers and stopped watching news for over six months. I am just now able to read a newspaper without wanting to go back to bed and cry for us all.

Sometimes all you can do is not look. You help when and where you can. And just so's you know, your calm words and soft humor here on Crazyboards have helped me often.

Greeny

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Cerberus, I think your words echo many of our feelings very well, as usual.  Thank you for putting it into words for all of us.  You may not be able to directly help the people of the hurricane, but you help us here every day.

I also believe in the collective consciousness, and I think each one of us is responsible for what we can do.  You may not be rescuing people in helicopters or donating large sums of money, but just the simple act of reading your words has brought comfort to me and a sense of not being alone in my fear.  Turn off the television for awhile.  That's what I'm having to do.  Breathe the fresh air, and please don't feel guilty because you're sitting there dry and fed.  You're where you're supposed to be.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Watching the news has not been helpful for my husband either. He is finally on the brink of seeing sunshine and this is bringing back the clouds. (I must admit is even making me nervous. All I could think about was how winter was going to suck with high energy prices so I went to the store today and stocked the cupboards till almost bursting.)

Anyway, we are not in any condition to help anyone else right now either, but I figured what we can do is to take care of ourselves as well as possible. This way we will not be using up resources, time and energy that could be better used elsewhere. No, we are not really being part of the solution so to speak, but sometimes just not being part of the problem is a big accomplishment.

OH! Just thought of something! Red cross needs blood donations...can you donate blood?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Cerberus,

I'm sorry it is getting you down so much. 

I'm taking the pledge and swearing off watching any more TV or reading the paper tonight. I'm playing armchair general through all this and screaming at the "journalists" who are serving no purpose but blaming everyone else for not instantaneoulsy saving and gratifying every poor soul.  Fucking useless idiots. Yesterday a Fox reporter chased a sherrif's deputy demanding to know why no one was delivering water.  He stood on the same spot all day.  He wasn't helping anyone but himself with his insightful reporting.  He could have picked up a pallet of water in his truck and helped out a couple hundred people.

Arrrggh.

Everything that can be done is being done.  It will just take time. 

A.M.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm playing armchair general through all this and screaming at the "journalists" who are serving no purpose but blaming everyone else for not instantaneoulsy saving and gratifying every poor soul.  Fucking useless idiots.

well said, AM!  lucky for me the baby has the remote most of the time so I HAVE to turn it from CNN. just as well.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It has me thinking twice about being medicated to the gills.  I know that unmedicated this would be pretty devastating for me. It really bothers me that I currently feel nothing.  I had the same reaction  to my lack of reaction following 9/11. 

The pdocs and tdocs say there is something wrong with you if stuff like this effects you so severely that you have trouble functioning.  I say there is something wrong with the people who are not effected to such a degree.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There are some events whose scope is just too overwhelming and horrifying to grasp. Depression exponentially magnifies my own feelings of helplessness, hopelessness and inadequacy in the face of them.

Sometimes all you can do is not look. You help when and where you can.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

i am so on the same page with you.....i don't watch the news, or read the paper. ....i, unfortunately , am blessed with some clairvoyant abilities, and can barely cope with the knowledge that events which i cannot control will destroy others. just the thought of reading the news, or seeing horrific events on tv is just way too much for me to handle.

i have, in some instances, been able to warn others of impending doom...it feels GREAT! ...alternately, how do you tell someone you just met that their son will die in a car crash on the parkway ? most people look at you like you have 7 heads if you dare to mention anything of the sort.

no news for me, thanks. i help when and where i can, and leave the rest up to my higher power.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

this stuff really gets me too. i don't watch tv news anymore because it's just too sensational. i read smart, concise newspapers like the guardian and plus with written news you get cartoons and crosswords to do to. it's a lot less emotional and far more constructive.

i used to be really upset that i couldn't change the world, and then my mother told me that charity begins at home. we can't ever make real change except in our immediate world, because of friction, the change gets gradually eroded away until there's nothing left for the intended recipient, (my mother explained it to me in terms of government - because new zealand has a smaller, less bureaucratic government than ours in australia, they can be progressive and pass laws quickly and change things because there's less opportunity for inertia and insidious pollution).

so, do things for those around you. i am like a tuning fork for good deeds - giving someone a lift home when they're waiting at the bus stop in the rain, helping old people with their shopping, writing a letter to someone who's down. because that's minimal effort with maximal gain.

anyway. i'm just a do-gooder with wayyyyy too much belief in karma...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

AirMarshall :

(please excuse any bizarre typing*  Asterixes will have to stand in for periods* 

I"m afraid I can"t agree with you about the journalists*  For four days now CNN has been reporting the growing crisis at the convention center in NO and the head of FEMA now says that today is the first the government knew anything about it*  Yesterday our oaf of a president announced that no one had forseen the failure of the levees*  Yet two days before Katrina made landfall I heard a report on NPR about exactly that possibility*  In fact the Army Corps of Engineers has been begging for the last five years for funding to strengthen those levees and the Bush administration has spent the last five years cutting millions of dollars out of the budget of those very projects*  I"m a federal employee with almost twenty years experience with the federal bureaucracy and I say our erstwhile executive branch has gotten caught with its pants down around its ankles* 

I am sick of hearing the asscovering lies out of the Bush administration*  I am in a cold fury that national guard units are dying in the Iraqi desert for the oil industry when we need them here at home > the same effing oil industry that is raking in the moola as we speak*  I drive a hybrid and I would have bought a fully electric car if one had been available*  I am livid at hearing that a conservative "Christian" group is blaming the hurricane disaster on >wait for it< homosexuals because they were planning their annual gathering in NO and the group claims that the disaster is God"s retribution for immorality*

There are thousands of superb men and women in the emergency services & what"s left of the national guard & police and fire departments & medical staffs & even just private citizens who are doing everything humanly possible without strong governmental leadership and organization and they are making a difference _ no doubt about it*  The journalists are doing their part too by getting information out in the middle of horrific conditions that they also are having to endure*  That"s their function and if the nitwits in the White House would turn on the effing television they might _ just might _ find out what"s really happening courtesy of those journalists*

I salute them for taking the personal risks and enduring the personal hardships so that we out here in Comfortland can know what"s really happening*  They ain"t doing it for the jollies*

Sorry if I seem terse but I"m angrier than I"ve been in a while*  I"m going back to sweeping up whale dung down here to make room for the next delivery*

Cerberus

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How we can go a million miles across the world, take over another country, transport men and women in and out of those combat zones, feed them, water them, and take care of them medically, but when it comes to evacuating people out of a town in Louisiana, we have to halt the evacuation process for a full day because shots are being fired?

I usually am very careful about saying negative things about people in charge, because I know all those decisions are tough, and I would hate to be in their shoes.  But Cerberus, I'm with you in my utter frustration about this.  The evacuation process for all those people in the Dome should have been started immediately, even before the flood happened.  The conditions were not good in there except for just housing people for the immediate emergency.  Reporters were moving in and out of the city, Harry Conic, Jr. was there, evidently there was a way in and out.  A lot of people could have been moved if busses had been continually picking people up for the last 3 days.  Most every church in this country owns a bus or two.  Couldn't they start sending transportation?  We have some big churches, why are they not being utilized to house and take care of poeple?  (Maybe they are, I don't know, I've sworn off the news except for maybe an hour a day.)

To me, seeing the president on television appointing people to fund raise is wonderful, but I would have preferred to see him dealing with the immediate situation---GET PEOPLE OUT OF THERE--NOW.  We will do the fund raising and details later. This is an immediate emergency--as in no time to lose. 

Pardon my rant.  I realize it's easy for me to talk because I'm sitting here not having to deal with all the details of this disaster.  I had to get it out, though, and now I'm going to concentrate on sending more positive thoughts. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

- I heard the president's remarks and they were patently rediculous. Unfortunately, everyone in office has to say "something" whether they know what the hell they are talking about or not.

- Just recalled a later interview on NPR with an engineer who said that was correct.  They did not expect the levees to give way.  They expected them to be topped by storm surge and waves.  Six of one, half dozen of another.

- I am not going to watch or listen to any of this today. Dreamed about it all last night.  Nothing we can do but get upset.

A.M.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I share the frustration and the horror watching this happen.

And New Orleans is not the only place struck by this disaster, there are many other towns and other people devastated. I don't want to believe how badly these people are being helped -- how this administration has left them to drown. It's shameful. And even if the president and his advisors cannot be ashamed, I certainly am.

It didn't need to be this bad! If the administration had been listening to the Corps of Engineers and supporting them in doing their job, the situation would be different today. I get angry watching Bush out there shaking people's hands as if he cares, and at the amount of money it takes to make that happen. Let him hang in Texas, take all the money for security and equipment and such spent for that visit and actually help people! (Although I do understand, and can't deny the 'need' for him to visit personally.)

I do what little I can, both with my few resources to donate and with my political choices. But I know that today, for thousands and thousands of people, it's not enough.

Fiona

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It really bothers me that I currently feel nothing.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

VE~

I totally know what you mean.  I worry about that kind of thing all the time.  As a singer, I need to be able to open up and feel things intensely in order to sing artistically.  The problem is that I would need to go off my meds and stop working so hard to keep myself un-depressed.  Then, I wouldn't be motivated to practice or anything.  I would just sit around all day eating and watching TV.  Sometimes everyone around me is really excited about something and I feel nothing.  I hate that feeling, but I guess it's a fair trade-off.

~CS

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sorry for going totaly OT here, but I just had to share this.  It makes me want to laugh, cry, and break things.

From http://business.bostonherald.com/businessN...rticleid=100857

The federal official in charge of the bungled New Orleans rescue was fired from his last private-sector job overseeing horse shows.

  And before joining the Federal Emergency Management Agency as a deputy director in 2001, GOP activist Mike Brown had no significant experience that would have qualified him for the position.

  The Oklahoman got the job through an old college friend who at the time was heading up FEMA.

  The agency, run by Brown since 2003, is now at the center of a growing fury over the handling of the New Orleans disaster.

  ``I look at FEMA and I shake my head,'' said a furious Gov. Mitt Romney yesterday, calling the response ``an embarrassment.''

  President Bush, after touring the Big Easy, said he was ``not satisfied'' with the emergency response to Hurricane Katrina's devastation.

  And U.S. Rep. Stephen Lynch predicted there would be hearings on Capitol Hill over the mishandled operation.

  Brown - formerly an estates and family lawyer - this week has has made several shocking public admissions, including interviews where he suggested FEMA was unaware of the misery and desperation of refugees stranded at the New Orleans convention center.

  Before joining the Bush administration in 2001, Brown spent 11 years as the commissioner of judges and stewards for the International Arabian Horse Association, a breeders' and horse-show organization based in Colorado.

  ``We do disciplinary actions, certification of (show trial) judges. We hold classes to train people to become judges and stewards. And we keep records,'' explained a spokeswoman for the IAHA commissioner's office. ``This was his full-time job . . . for 11 years,'' she added.

  Brown was forced out of the position after a spate of lawsuits over alleged supervision failures.

  ``He was asked to resign,'' Bill Pennington, president of the IAHA at the time, confirmed last night.

  Soon after, Brown was invited to join the administration by his old Oklahoma college roommate Joseph Allbaugh, the previous head of FEMA until he quit in 2003 to work for the president's re-election campaign.

This one is just as infuriating:

http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/09/03/katrina.chertoff/

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...