Kept alive by artificial means

[Zeke]

Hi, I've looked up stuff here before, but never looked at the boards until today.  I got nervy and posted a new topic, which I suppose could get me flamed if I stepped on somebody else's turf.

I was depressive for many years, and it got harder and harder to treat until finally it was very hard for my pdoc to pull me out.  Then I had a relatively minor manic phase for a few months and he informed me that I am actually bipolar.  This was really weird because my husband is too, but he mainly goes manic(I could tell some interesting stories about that) and has only had one or two real depressions, for which he wasn't even treated and went away on their own.  Our son for obvious reasons is also bipolar; we may have decided not to have children if we had known we had such lousy genes.

I am able to hold down a teaching job, though my tolerance for overwork is less than that of my colleagues, because I tend to get paralyzed if there is too much to do.  My pdoc is concerned about how much medication I am on, but it hasn't looked as if it would be possible to reduce it until recently.  Now he wants to start by reducing my anti-psych, Geodon.  I'm a little worried about that, but less than I would be if it were something else.

I take Trileptal, Wellbutrin, Geodon and Lamictal, as well as a small dose of Elavil which is supposed to help me sleep(though I doubt it really does).  Plus a few other drugs for non-psych things.  I feel like a droid or something sometimes, unable to imagine what I would be like without all these chemicals, and not sure I want to find out anytime soon.

So that's a few things about me.  Hello!

Zeke

(by the way so nobody gets mad at me, I am female)

[pacanuck]

Hi, I've looked up stuff here before, but never looked at the boards until today.

[Alice]

Hello Zeke,

Welcome to the board. (Welcome aboard?). I think you will find this a supportive place.

I'm glad you decided to post.