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So Secrets (who should really register) inspired me to start this topic as a beacon of hope to depressed people like myself. Instead of offering pithy wisdom, encouragement, or advice, this topic is for comiserating by spewing ways in which you feel you suck. Reasons why you'll never be happy again. Why your whole existence is flawed. That sort of thing. Please no cheer-up talk. If someone posts and sounds particularly off-kilter, message them or whatever. This thread is solely for sharing why you are doomed, so that others can benefit by realizing they aren't the only ones who suck.

OK I'll start. Reasons I suck:

I tried to kill myself when I was 18, and went to the loony bin for a few months. Wasn't the last time -- I've been in several times. Psychiatrists generally don't like me.

I smoked a lot of pot, drank a lot of alcohol, and did a bunch of acid in my teens and 20s (though the acid was only about a year around age 17).

In school I often didn't work very hard, dropping lots of classes, missing lots of classes, and taking over 7 years to get through college with a degree I haven't particularly used.

I don't know my parents' birthdays.

I never write thank-you notes or send holiday cards.

I masturbate too much. I think. I like porn too.

I don't keep up with the dishes or laundry or bills, and I never ever clean the bathroom. I rarely vacuum.

I'm very selfish and tend to think about others long after stewing in thoughts of myself when conflicts arise.

I have never voted. I don't even like my country much.

I dislike most of my friends, which is probably part of the reason I'm no longer in touch with most of them. I never kept up with high school friends, college friends, and at this point it looks like I'll retain exactly zero friends from my prior career.

None of my exes will speak to me. The more I've loved them, the more I've hurt them, most notably traumatizing the love of my life by calling her during my suicide attempt when I was 18, and subsequently being a major personality disordered nutjob to her for the next dozen years.

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I began shoplifting and stealing from my parents when I was nine years old because I hated my mother for having another child.  Got caught shoplifting at 16.  Got caught stealing from parents and grandmother at 18.

I huffed a ton, and I mean a ton of rubber cement when I was in high school that I think that's why I'll never be the same mentally again.  Yes folks, I huffed glue and tripped my fucking balls off...and yeah, I know, I'm a girl and I don't have balls.

I began doing more drugs after my husband and I seperated.  The list: Coke, X, Acid, Pot, Shrooms, and I did them a lot.  Confession.  I still smoke up, and if there's coke around, I'll still snort it.  I was in my late 20's and now I'm in my early 30's.

I never pay my bills, my mother sees to that.  I hate responsibility.  I hate cleaning, even though I used to be a neat freak at one time, I hate that I have all this shit in my house and I don't have a nice clean organized house like my best friend does.  I'm not going to pay rent this month because I spent most of my money on myself already.

I hate myself.  I'm fat.  Ugly, you name it.  Sure I'm pretty in the face, but it's not going to get me a boyfriend any time soon.  I too, masturbate too much.  I hate porn.  But I'm a sadist and wish I had a willing masochistic partner.  I do, however, like to read erotica romances and fetish books.  I also enjoy cybersex with certain people and phone sex.  DON'T ASK for my number fella's.  I have my favorites.

I feel I'm worthless as a musician and author.

In general, I wish I were dead at times.  I won't commit suicide, but I do wish that I would go to bed and never wake up just so I won't have to face reality anymore.

I enjoy self-injury.  Example, I slash my arms up with scissors. 

I won't quit smoking even though I want to.

The End...I think.

OH...if I could, I would like to punish every single guy who raped me or sexually violated me.  Tie them up, beat them up, hurt them, scar them for life.  Give them nightmares like they've given me.  But, I won't.  My mind plays out these intense movies of me getting even with them, but I would never do it. 

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Hey Scarlet.

I too have gone to bed wishing, or praying even that I would just die in my sleep. Many periods in my life. And I was just thinking, as I lay insomniac on my couch, that I really don't know how to be responsible in any consistent way for other people, never mind responsible for myself. Also I'm bald. Also I haven't showered since Friday, which is disgusting.

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I love this thread.

Reasons I suck.

I have never had a positive romantic relationship.

I can't spell for shit anymore.

I can't read a book for more than an hour before I have to stop cuz I can't focus.

I don't masturbate enough.

I sleep too much.

I am fat.

My head is funny shaped.

No matter how much I have, I always want more.

I complain too much.

I suck at organizing things.

I can't get over her.

I don't want to get over her.

I seek validation from others.

I am terrified of living a wasted life.

I could go on and on, but you are probably bored already.

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I complain about everything but never do anything to change

I'm mean

I'm scared of people

I hate people

I'm lazy

My place is a mess

My head is a mess

I'm weak

I have nothing to say except whining about how crappy I'm feeling

I don't care about anything

I hate myself

I'm a selfish brat

I like feeling sorry for myself

I refuse to acknowledge anything good in my life or myself

I'm arrogant

I can't get outside my head

I don't like anyone or anything

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Guest Secrets

its easier to just slap up a name then to login cause i'm on dial-up

i'm an old maid

i live alone' i have no children

i have no hobbies

my teeth are bucked

men dont acknowledge me

i am not motivated to do anything

i drag myself to work and spend most of the day in my head depressed

i cry in my bed at night watching endless repeats on tv

have no friends , and i mean none

im sick of seeing others in a happy family who have somone

i just lay about wasting myself

i dont eat properly i dont have the motivation tp prepare food

my apartment is drab and i'm not motivated to do anything

i hate waking up in the morning

i'm a piece of shit who is numb 

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I sideswiped a car a few weeks ago because I was concerned about the chocolate covered gummy bear that I dropped on my lap.

My garbage smelled and had bugs in it and I put it in the closet so I wouldn't smell it.  By the time I actually did something about it, there were maggots.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

ok. you guys rock! don't you see? that's so beautiful, that instead of doing these pathetic NORMAL things, you sidle somewhere along the edge of reality and embrace being nutty!

well, i suck too.

i NEVER masturbate and if i do, i have to cut myself afterwards.

i scare off all potential friends/lovers with information such as above.

whenever someone does something nice for me, i either run away or ignore it.

i am a spoiled child - i have had every opportunity in the world and still managed to fuck up pretty thoroughly.

i borderline split everything so ferociously i have to have little mental maps of where it's safe to go in case i meet someone/something on the "bad" list.

i really miss being anorexic and skinny (read: fucked up values), and in a perverse way, want it back.

i am also a bad driver - i had to pad my carport with foam.

i trip over a lot.

i have dandruff and scaly patches from psoriasis.

i picked a career that will fulfil me only through extraordinary stress and craziness, when i could have done gender studies and read books and written short stories and be happy.

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Guest Secrets

yet another holiday I spend alone

never been in a positive relationship

i have no friends at all

all i wanna do is sleep and be miserable

i never wanna go to work again

my eyesight is getting very bad

i wanna move just to get some excitement and start over

i want to have fun so bad, and laugh butdoing it alone spoils the mood

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Instead of offering pithy wisdom, encouragement, or advice, this topic is for comiserating by spewing ways in which you feel you suck. Reasons why you'll never be happy again. Why your whole existence is flawed. That sort of thing. Please no cheer-up talk. If someone posts and sounds particularly off-kilter, message them or whatever. This thread is solely for sharing why you are doomed, so that others can benefit by realizing they aren't the only ones who suck.

Jemini -

I had considered closing this thread, even though some have said they liked it, but having taken counsel with my fellow moderators, I am simply going to insert an objection here to your thread.

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I don't see what that has to do with how much you suck, but whatever.

If you can't laugh at your own deeply wrong existence, what can you laugh at? Anyway no one's putting a gun to anyone else's head and making them post here. The idea was to let things out of the closet, to be honest. Yes, several people have said they like the thread, and I like it too. It makes me feel better to write this stuff.

I walked around in public for a while today with the size sticker still stuck to the back of my Old Navy shorts.

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Guest Secrets

I watch others n TV and in real life living there life

i have been posting personal ads for years only for it fail miserably 

personal ads were the only connection to a possible mate that I had

I meet noone in public everyone looks over me, wish i wasnt here

i left the apartment once to move my car, gas is too expensive to drive around

driving around is miserable as I have to see others with things I crave (companionship)

They make me sick! why am i not able to make a life for myself

I barely eat healthy meals, i dread cooking

i never exercised today

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I am not good enough for my parents

I am fat and ugly

Men see me as a friend and never a lover

They only use me for sex or money

I have never had a decent relationship

I eat too much

I live alone and figure that is how it is going to be forever

I want to die

I have bad habits but cant stop

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Guest Secrets

;) Felt like an idiot today leaving my apartment and seeing the family across the street having a barbeque and playing music whilst I feel like the neighborhood recluse :)

I just dont fit anywhere

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