Brain/ Body Memory for past Rx

[Hotmess]

I am wondering if anyone else has experienced this and if there is any merit to this posible theory I'm having about my meds and how fast I beleive I responded to them.

Backstory is that I was on a combo of Lexapro and Welburtin for 7 years. Worked well for me. I was stable. Perfect no, but not depressed, very little anxiety, I was functioning and living life for a LONG time.

Back in April I decided to wean off the meds b/c I want to get pregnant and I know there are risks associated with Pregnancy and meds. Since I was doing well and it had been over 10 years since I've feel depression I figured I was "cured" lol HAH. Insert laughts and finger pointing.

Anyway, it's a long story but once I was off the meds for about a month, things got really bad. Once the phsycial withdrawal symptoms subsided, I became super depressed. Like the worst I've ever had to the point where I was thinking about death and dying and crying all the time, rageful, anxiety, just bad news. (Mixed Episode?)

So after weeks of trying to push through med free I realized it wasn't an option for me and I'm giving into the drugs.

I went back to doc to discuss going back on Lexapro and Welbutrin and He suggested Lamictal. Said that he thinks I need a mood stabilizer. Well that may be but right now I"m super depressed and I want to feel better so shouldn't I go back to what I know worked for me? And wouldn't an antidepressant (especially one that worked) be a better choice???

Well long story short he strongly advised to try lamictal and I did so reluctantly. I was scared though so I went to see a second doc who also agreed I should try the Lamictal. OK. Fine.

After two weeks at 25mgs on Lamictal, I wasn't feeling better but I realize that it takes time and you have to titrate up etc... then I spoke to my "second opinion" doc and she suggested I augment the lamictal with Zoloft and NOT titrate up to 50mgs on Lamictal. I found this odd too so I kind of freaked out Monday b/c I took zoloft in the past and it did nothing for me and b/c I was feeling desperate to feel better that morning, I took it upon myself to ignore the zoloft suggestion and instead took 10mgs of lexapro and 75mgs of welbutrin along w/ the 25mgs of Lamictal. (first time I've taken Lex/ Welbutin in months)

I know the general belief is than one day and often times weeks to see benefits from AD's but I swear - for the first time in Months.... I FEEL BETTER. Within hours of taking the lexapro and welbutrin I felt a huge difference where I finally felt like "myself" again for a moment. It was crazy. I actually stopped in my tracks and I was like, "wow, I feel different. I don't have that cloud over my head. No WAY this is working already right?"

So I thought, could this be from the lexapro and welbutrin ALREADY working? No way. Is it that the lamictal is finally kicking in? Why do I feel a difference finally?

Naturally the first instinct is that it's Psychological. That maybe just knowing I took something that I believe in my heart will make me feel better took that anxiety away and that made me feel some sense of hope etc?

But then, in talking with my husband he was suggesting that there is probably something to be said for the brain / body sort of recognizing the drugs consdering I was on them for 7 years and my brain was kind of "re-wired" to work with them... and that b/c I was still in "withdrawal" - my body took to them really fast and it made me feel better b/c my brain sort of went... ahhh there it is... there's what's been missing.

Is that possible? Has anyone else experienced this? I suspect it may be a combo of both of the two things... psychological as WELL as Physicological... but either way I find it pretty interesting and I'm not COMPLAINING just curious.

So... sorry to be so long winded (I know no other way) but I wanted to see if a nyone had an opinon on this, and if anyone gives any merit to that theory that my body rememberd these meds and therefore was able to benefit from them quicker. (Keep in mind they were definittely out of my system b/c it's been 3 months off meds)

Thanks!

[Artemisia]

Well, I've had the opposite experience. I took myself off perfectly working antidepressants twice (first Zoloft, then Effexor XR), and I stayed off them for 6+ months. When my depression returned (it returns very slowly for me), a sane prescriber put me back on what had formerly worked for me, but neither Zoloft nor Effexor would work again. I wasn't happy...

Anyway, generally, when a patient stops a med that worked, it makes the most sense to put them right back on it. The reason I suspect your doctor didn't want to put you on antidepressants again was because of the suspicion of bipolar...

I tend to feel a difference from antidepressants after just a couple of days, too. I don't know why. It may be the placebo effect although in Wellbutrin's case, I'm pretty sure I started experiencing side effects (insomnia, light sensitivity) right away.

Sorry I don't have a good explanation...

It sounds that now you should tell your doctor that you're back on your old combination, and that it's working--and hope for their blessing.

[sorrel]

It could be either or both. No one knows what kind of long-term effect ("re-wiring"), if any, occurs from antidepressants. It is possible that something in the brain is changed long-term with a drug, affecting how that drug works later. It is also possible nothing like that happens. Personally, I'd vote for placebo effect as the cause of this phenomenon, but I'm a cynic like that, sorry. Regardless ... it's good things have improved.

[Hotmess]

Yes, I'm going to see Doc #1 in about an hour. He'll probably say I should have given the lamictal more time to work bla bla bla, but at the same time, If I'm feeling better isnt that what matters most? And isn't it better that I not have to wait the 5+ weeks for the lamictal to work if something else makes me better sooner? I mean it's only been 3 days so I need to give it more time and I'm not 100% better, I still debated getting out of bed this morning and worried about what kind of day it would be but so far I am feelnig more myself than I have in months.

I worreid about what you experienced artemeisa. I've read before that people stopped taking meds and when they went back on they did not work the same... but I'm hoping that/s not the case.

I tend to agree the Placebo effect is undeniable.... I had a lot of anxiety about NOT taking these meds and trying to understand WHY the docs didn't think I should go back to them... so when I finally took them, I think that quieted that part of my anxiety for sure.

Still i can't help but wonder if my brain or body remembers... especially after all those years.