Mental pain from lack of sleep

[flyingcar]

I just wanted to share something that happened to me the other day. I have been having trouble getting to sleep at night for the past month or so. It will very often take 2 hours or more for me to get to sleep from the time that I go to bed. This is probably due to the medication that I'm on (I was on Abilify for Bipolar Disorder and I was changed to Geodon). The other night it was taking me so long to get to sleep that I decided that I would just stay up all night - my logic being that if I didn't sleep all that time, I would be tired the next night and I would be able to go to bed earlier. So I went through with my plan, only I decided to take a nap at around 2 or 3. That didn't really work out as I kept having these weird feelings every time I started to fall asleep - but that's the subject of another discussion.

So that night I went out with some friends and I was mostly feeling fine, but around 10pm I started to feel really, really tired. I didn't tell my friends because we had all come in the same car, and if I were to go home that would pretty much end the evening for us. I sat there for an hour or two, in excruciating mental pain because I needed to sleep. This seemed like it was beyond the normal crappy feeling you get when you've been deprived of sleep - it was a terrible mental pain (not physical pain, though) that made it almost impossible to function. I had a hard time talking, too. Another strange thing was the fact that my eyes didn't feel heavy at all. Usually when I'm tired I have a hard time keeping my eyes open. Not this time. For this reason, I wasn't sure, and I'm still not sure, if the feeling I was experiencing was entirely due to lack of sleep.

At a certain point it got so bad that I had to say something. My friends drove me home and I put on my pajamas and threw myself into my bed. What surprised me was the fact that I didn't get to sleep right away. Usually when I am this tired I fall asleep almost immediately when I go to bed and close my eyes. Instead I was just lying in bed with this terrible feeling in my head wishing that sleep would come and take it away. I also noticed that my heart seemed to be beating rather quickly. At a certain point I was feeling so bad that I was afraid it wouldn't stop, and I started thinking that I might need to go the hospital or something because I couldn't take the pain much longer. After a while I realized that thinking about calming, pleasant thoughts seemed to help. I ended up thinking about GIR from Invader Zim. Once I started thinking about things like that I could feel my heartbeat slowing and the pain slowly melting away. A couple times I randomly saw strange images in my mind that were somewhat upsetting (I can't remember what they were) and this seemed to bring back the pain somewhat and made me feel like I was being brought away from sleep. But more and more the calming, pleasant images and thoughts came to dominate my mind. Eventually the pain went away completely, and after that I slept peacefully until the next morning.

So what exactly was this feeling that I experienced, and what does this all mean? Is it anything to be worried about? It hasn't happened since.

[bpladybug]

" This seemed like it was beyond the normal crappy feeling you get when you've been deprived of sleep - it was a terrible mental pain (not physical pain, though) that made it almost impossible to function. I had a hard time talking, too."

I have experienced something similar. I would best describe it as anguish, like everything was too bright and too sharp because I was exhausted. Very different from the falling asleep sitting up experience. Now, GIR from Invader Zim?? What is that, lol. It provided you with some comforting imagery.

I think you should talk with your doctor about a different Atypical AP. This sleep problem is in itself really bad for bipolar disorder. Maybe you and your doctor can consider other med options.

[flyingcar]

Gir is a stupid robot from a cartoon called Invader Zim. I'm not sure why that was comforting, but it was.

I've already talked to my doctor about my sleep problems, and he didn't seem to think it had anything to do with my medication. It didn't seem like he really understood what I said or knew what he was talking about. Honestly I think he's pretty useless and I don't think he really cares about my problems.

[bpladybug]

Gir is a stupid robot from a cartoon called Invader Zim. I'm not sure why that was comforting, but it was.

I've already talked to my doctor about my sleep problems, and he didn't seem to think it had anything to do with my medication. It didn't seem like he really understood what I said or knew what he was talking about. Honestly I think he's pretty useless and I don't think he really cares about my problems.

Can you look for another doctor? You deserve a better relationship than that. the Geodon might just be too activating for you. Something like Seroquel might reduce your anxiety and help you sleep. We are all different and that is why there are different anti-psychotics. It is not one size fits all. If you can't quit him than try to talk with him again about your sleep. You could also ask for a simple sleeping pill like ambien or lunesta.

[flyingcar]

I'm going to get a new doctor anyway - I'm going back to school and my school is in a different town. I don't really know the guy all that well, so I'm not sure if he's much better. It's also kinda hard for me to get a different doctor because the ones I've been seeing are 100% covered by my insurance, whereas most other places aren't.

My doctor actually prescribed me some Seroquel, but I'm afraid to take it. He told me it's a mood stabilizer, and frankly I like the way my mood has been lately. I don't want to alter it in any way. I don't think my sleep problems are due to anxiety - I don't really have much to be anxious about. I guess there are a few things, but I don't really feel anxious as I'm lying in my bed trying to fall asleep.

[bpladybug]

Seroquel is great for sleep, for anxiety too. What dose did he give you? 25 mgs or 50 mgs ? If so that is really low. People take as much as 800 mgs. for schizophrenia. My point being do not be afraid of a tiny, low dose of Seroquel. oh, I take it, btw

[flyingcar]

So... will it alter my mood at all? Whatever kind of effects it has, are they temporary, or will they last for a while after I initially take it? It's 25 mgs, by the way.