Just me

[LittlePhoebe]

Hi. I have bee reading the posts here for quite some time. I have tried to talk to friends and family about my ongoing depression. I've suffered from depression on and off from my early twenties (am 49 now). A little over three years ago my husband and I lost our only child who was 25 in a car accident and of course I have spiraled downhill ever since.

I had my last dose of effexor (after trying all the other SSRI's) on Monday so I am in tears writing this. My emotions are out of control and I don't know that I can make it until Sunday when I get to start Parnate (MAOI). That's all I can type right now.

[AnneMarie]

Hi LittleP. I'm glad you have a doc skilled enough in ADs to go to Parnate. I hope it works for you. There is hope and there is a future, you know. Sometimes they might be a little hard to find, but that doesn't mean they are lost to you forever. I have not lost a child but I have been in the pit. It's rough, but living fully does happen again.

Welcome to CB. Feel free to post your questions or reply to others. In fact, we encourage that. In addition to the Boards there are Blogs and Chat. Both can be a good way to get out some of what's bottled up and to get support in return. Check them out when you have time. And, please contact a mod with any questions you may have. We are a pretty friendly group.

[mika]

Welcome and I am sooo sorry about your son. Not fair.

You will love it on CB as everyone is so empathetic and helpful.

Thanks for the chat about getting a breast reduction It was really nice to meet you.

[wondernut]

Little Phoebe welcome

our story is so similar ..it will be the 3rd anniversary of us loosing our son Novemeber 11th his birthday is next month ...so it is killing me inside right now.....and it makes me cry to read your post ..please feel free to pm me anytime

this is a very sad club no one wants to be part of ..in fact I was stunned at how many folks that were my "friends" who avoided me in the beginning because I was living their worst fear in life...strangers came out of the woodwork and only a few friends stuck close ...

I cried for six weeks recently and finally started wellbutrin ..I took effexor after I lost my son and while it got me to work and back it was not the right drug for me

when you find the right one it lets you have your grief and live your life ...I am feeling that now after a month ..I still have good and bad days ..but not the overwhelming pit of hell I was living in

also I hesitated joining this board because I was grieving so much I just wanted to isolate ..

but I have been pretty crazy all my life ...and being nuts does not leave you exempt from tragedy that is for sure ..in fact it was good to have a place like this to post having both in my life

take good care and again feel free anytime to just flip me a note

I have no words to tell you how deeply I feel for you right now and I hope this new drug works for you

many hugs

[olga]

Phoebe, welcome to Crazyboards. I am so sorry about your son. As you can see from Wondernut's reply, some of our members have suffered a similar tragedy in their families. You have my sincere sympathy.

I hope the new drug works, too. I never got much result from SSRIs---my depression didn't ease up until I tried Cymbalta and then WellbutrinXL. I hope your psychiatrist will work hard to find something effective. Depression is a black pit.

Please contact a mod if you have questions.

olga

[LittlePhoebe]

Thanks so much for all the replies. Today isn't any better for me. My pharmacy is "trying" to find a company they can get Parnate from. That scares me. I'm supposed to start taking it on Sunday.