New Member

[vulfgrl]

Just found this site, think it's awesome. I'm paranoid schizophrenic, diagnosed in 2005, but one of the lucky early onset before age 9. Runs in my family. I still argue with doctors that tell me I have a brain disorder. I can find anything or anyone, and I'm currently getting a degree in Criminal Justice. Being spoiled rotten my whole life probably hasn't helped. I'm also very smart, and both of my parents are attorneys, so I debate everything. Drives people crazy

Just started on respiradol. Not sure if I like it. I feel slower. Doesn't knock me out like Zyprexa did, but I'm not going in a million directions, so it feels odd to me. I read a lot of medical studies, because I feel if I can understand it, maybe I can control it. It's worked so far, no trail of dead bodies of those who are out to get me.

[Moil]

Well hello.  I am inclined to agree on the awesomeness of this site.  I look forward to loosing debates to you in the future. 

[The Emperor]

Hello, welcome to the boards!

[vulfgrl]

The did have issues at 9 (voices, seeing things, total breakdown), but don't recall much. I know my mom took me to the dr because the school made her. When he wanted to keep me in over the summer for observation, she decided to never take me back to another dr, and switched schools. I was an angry child, but never knew I was crazy. My mom's delusions were what bothered me. When you're rich and religious and hear voices, you blame it on demons. And my grandfather has kept grandma off the grid most of her life, so she can do whatever she wants. Right now she's into collecting raccoon tails just to be different. I mostly grew up thinking everyone was after me and they were all stupid. I guess it gave me lots of self esteem being so important

This past year I've really been working hard on my social skills. People love me because I'm so out there and fun, but it's not so great for making close friends. It didn't help growing up not being allowed to speak with many people, but I do have a hard time now with small talk and having a filter. I don't try to be mean, but people get offended sometimes when I don't know what I said wrong! I'm also really trying to not be jealous when it comes to my boyfriend. I detach very quickly and easily, and if I start to get stressed, I stop feeling anything. It's another thing I'm working on, because most of my life I was a total bitch. I don't just hide my emotions, I don't feel them, and I'm trying to not do that any more. It's hard learning to feel. It's also a physical thing. I fractured my spine at 16. and didn't go to the dr for a week because I finally couldn't stand up. I don't know if anyone else has experienced something like this, and most people don't seem to understand, so I'm not sure how to fix not feeling things.

hello vulfgrl, and welcome to CB

ati am also a COS schizoohrenic, although i was 11/12. just right at the cutoff. but i cant imagine beng under 9, thats rough. and im sorry you had to endure that. however, this is a great place to be whith where you are at in your life (from what i can tell). youll find CB to be amazingly supportive and informational. from medication issues to family feuds. welcome to the friendly madd house stay as long as youd like!