humanoid Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 I'm not sure how to start this...I feel a bit awkward giving an introduction but I assume this is the best place to begin being new and all! My name is Jess, I recently turned 19, and I'm a girl. I'm not sure if I feel comfortable enough to spew my whole story right now, nor do I think anyone really wants to read all of that but I'll tell some basics. I have dealt with mental illness since I was 12 years old. I was originally diagnosed with clinical depression, but found out earlier this year that it was incorrect. I am diagnosed bipolar, and suspected borderline, but I've not been in to get an official diagnosis yet. I was told that I had this when I was hospitalized at age 15 but they can't officially diagnose a minor, so I've been waiting. Tried to get in for a visit to a specific BPD treatment facility but my appointment got canceled and I didn't try again. I'm not sure if I want that diagnosis. I also have trichotillomania, though am lucky enough to not have the urge to pull out the hair on my head so no one knows unless I tell them. And a diagnosis of social anxiety disorder but this hasn't been as big a problem for me in many, many years. I recently, about a month ago, went off all medications. I guess I got sick of always having to remember to swallow down several pills morning and night, and I guess I felt like it wasn't giving me much of a benefit either. It's nice not to experience withdrawal after missing one dose and it's nice not to constantly have to get refills and make trips out when all I want to do is sleep. I know it's not the right thing, and I know my mood has changed for the worse, but I also feel that it's my choice whether I want to be medicated or not and I've never really had that choice until now. I figure I'll eventually go back to the psychiatrist and get back on track but life un-medicated isn't too terribly miserable. I'm not sure what I'm looking for here...a bit confused on that, but I could always use someone to talk to that knows what I'm going through. I tried a support group, but I'm bad with commitments. Same deal with therapy and seeing my psychiatrist...just so sick of it all. Is there anyone around with similar issues that wouldn't mind sharing experiences or just listening to me? There aren't many people in my life that I feel I can share everything with without being judged or called crazy, something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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