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um crazy with three kids to raise


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HI

I have always felt alone in the world because no one else appears to feel as confused as I often do! I just feel different. Then I stopped by this web site and I can relate to what I am reading. Thanks guys :-) I have three children to lead through life and I am often concerned I am not quite put together enough to raise them. evidence provides that I am actually doing exceptionally well raising them. I am doing fine people say. better than fine. But the only thing I see are my mistakes and "poor qualities". this is a terrifically irritating time in my life. work kids and a crazy brain. no one else makes daily comments on their brain. I do. I make references to my my crazy brain all the time in conversations or in apologies. thats why I am here. typing.

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Welcome to CB. :)

I'm crazy with four kids to raise (mostly on my own-- their father has them on weekends-- their stepfather just moved out last week :( ). I have similar issues-- only seeing the mistakes, not hearing the people telling me how fabulous the kids are (or thinking that they are that way *despite* me), thinking people are mad as hatters if they tell me what a great mom I am (even when the kids say it). It's something I am working on-- relearning old, ineffective behaviors (yay DBT!).

At any rate, I have moments now and then when I can actually understand the truth in what a person is saying-- usually when they acknowledge that I do indeed have a MI, and remind me that I am keeping it together (for the most part, for the important parts), working, and raising four kids all while being very ill. When I am reminded that it is a challenge just to stand up some days, and yet I still do it, one foot in front of the other.

One thing I have found to be very important is for the kids to understand that I have an illness, a real illness in my brain, and that it makes me act in certain ways at certain times. That it is an illness just like the diabetes their father has, and just as he needs to take insulin every day, I need to take my medication every day. And sometimes I have to go to the hospital.

Speaking of which, I need to go to sleep so I don't go right back there because I am too exhausted from lack of sleep.

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welcome, and yes, being a crazy mom can have it's pitfalls to the old self esteem. i frequently second guess myself and wish, "what if" but you know hwat, my little guy has compassion, a great sense of self, and love for both his crazy parents. If he has an MI , I want him to be proud (Well, he has ADHD for now, but if more toddles along) and to be able to say, you know what, my parents did it and I can too.

we don't ignore the crazy in our house, and I think that benefits everyone. Kudos to you for doing a good job with your kids, and welcome to the boards. Listen to others on this issue, not that voice in your head that tells you you suck.

Anna

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  • 2 weeks later...

hi there, I'm a mom of 3 young girls. I feel like i could snap at any time but what mom of a few kids dosen't........... right? ;) It shard for anyone......but throw in a mental illness and that makes it sooooooo much harder.

I often feel like nobody understands how i am feeling. I always have mothers guilt......its hard n it sucks! welcome!

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