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mood swings - clouded thinking - mind over matter?


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during my last doc appointment he said he wants to make slight med changes very slowly because hes fearful of me having flare ups (which id written about in my case history). i was little dissapointed i wasn't getting any lithium and instead was going to stay with abilify 5 mg for a month. and im still dissapointed because my moods are back and forth a lot (from mild to moderate depression to normalness) and i can't think clearly or speak well. this may have something to do with my mother, who has mood issues of her own, being here. however if i keep myself occupied i'm ok. but what bugs me most about all this is that this pdoc put the idea into my head "bipolar psychotic depression" (what does that mean? BP I? BP NOS?) and soon after the diagnosis i started noticing my moods fluctuating. don't you find this odd? would it be safe to say that if the dx is correct, not major depression with psychotic features (my initial dx), then signs of the condition would come up after being given the diagnosis? how do you make sense of this?

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I'm afraid I am not understanding your question entirely, but the gist seems to be that you are disappointed that your meds are not being changed more quickly?

And that you are not sure if you are bp or not?

Is this correct?

Anna

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I'm afraid I am not understanding your question entirely, but the gist seems to be that you are disappointed that your meds are not being changed more quickly?

And that you are not sure if you are bp or not?

Is this correct?

Anna

not really. i'm fairly certain i'm bp, especially after looking over childhood signs of bp. i'm just unsure as to what bipolar psychotic depression means (that's the label the new doc gave me). but that's not really all that important, that was just an aside if anyone could answer. the fact that i noticed all these mood fluctuations and anxiety issues almost immediately after being given the label is the main thing. this right here is the gist of what im saying

"but what bugs me most about all this is that this pdoc put the idea into my head "bipolar psychotic depression" and soon after the diagnosis i started noticing my moods fluctuating. don't you find this odd? would it be safe to say that if the dx is correct, not major depression with psychotic features (my initial dx), then signs of the condition would come up after being given the diagnosis? how do you make sense of this?"

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So what you're saying is that the doctor gave you a Dx and then all of a sudden you started showing those symptoms?

i started showing mood swings. iv always had the problems with psychosis but not so much the mood swings.. til recently. i have had a manic episode which was drug induced, and this doctor was the only one who picked up on the mania in my case history. it sounds kind of weird, like i'm latching on to his word too much or maybe it even sounds like i'm reading into physical sensations too much, but one thing i know for sure is that sometimes i'm up and brain is going really fast, sometimes i'm normal and its slowed down, and sometimes i'm feeling depressed. and by depressed i don't mean sad or "blue" i mean DEPRESSED (albeit mild-moderate) people throw around that word so much now its lost its meaning.

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I think sylvan has good advice here.... and also, I agree on talking more about what the dx means. What you describe sounds more like a mixed episode to me than anything, but perhaps yoru doctor is seeinig things that you aren't describing, and in a "psychotic" depression, which I have had, depression with psychosis, is how I've defined it, I've defintiely been cranky and highly anxious and paranoid.

I'm not sure it's the label that matters so much but how well teh meds are treating the sx you are having. Best of luck with that, but if you are confused about the hows and whys of your dx, the doc is the person to ask about it...

Anna

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