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i realized a while ago that my head was just one giant paradox. my auditory hallucination, jack ( along with my old ones) made up this list of rules i HAD to follow. i would freak out and/ or go into a depression if i didnt. after about 2 years with all this i realized my hallucinations werent real, and i started thinking something was wrong with me. however, it was againts the rules to think that there was something wrong with me. it was also against the rules to get help. against the rules to talk to people about my problems and feelings. pretty soon a paradox starts to form.. i want help, because i knew i was suicidal, i had voices, but i cant say anything cuz i was waaaay to scared, but because i dont get help, i get depressed, jack talks and yells more, so i want help for that, and viola! the paradox cycle is born! anyone else ever had something similar to this? i bet something like this is pretty common.

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I've never had this, but I've come across this in some research I've done on ritual abuse. Apparently this is what happens to people who have been "programmed" not to remember what has happened to them, when they begin to remember. Suicide can be programmed into someone. This often hits in the early 30's but can be at any time.

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Guest Vapourware

Sounded like you had command hallucinations? I think they are fairly common when it comes to psychotic disorders. I had a similar experience last year with my auditory hallucinations. They were telling me that I should kill myself, and that I didn't deserve to live.

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They sound like command hallucinations. I deal with them, and they are terrifying. They tell me to do things, and if I don't do the things I say or I do it to a bad quality I get in trouble basically. With mine, they tell me to do simple things like move one object to another spot, or they get really bad and tell me to hurt myself, or hurt others.

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