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is increased mental visuals a precursor to mania?

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the last 3 nights when i first close my eyes there are these beautiful, beautiful images that flash inside my mind. i mean, beautiful colors, beautiful designs that i could create if i could take a snapshot of that moment. (i do not retain)

is this ominous? is a manic attack about to happen? lately, i have been calm, productive, able to speak easily. i do think a lot, but i can stop it. i just feel good and normal. (did i jinx?)

my sleep has been interrupted because of a bladder thing. but, i do still get 6-8 hrs a night. am i doing better because i haven't been sleeping 12-14 hrs? (do get exhausted by 7)

okay, this may be bad. i just got my income taxes back. i was in the thrift store and decided i was going to open a store on the internet. so, i bought about a hundred dollars worth of stuff. and, in a thrift store, that adds up to a lot of stuff.

i do have a compulsive spending problem. and ever since bipolar, my tastes have changed a lot since before. i am always buying inexpensive stuff when i am out that reflects the personality i feel inside. it is my way of "showing" and validating who i feel i am on the inside. i am very terrible with verbal explanations.

i am going to sell all of it this weekend at a garage sale. maybe break even. (it will kinda be a good way to learn if i have any taste or not!)

i am on a good run right now as far as accomplishing stuff. (not in a racy way) kinda just methodical.

gonna just keep pluggin' along, see what happens. it is just a weird kinda normal mixed in with a little bit of crazy. i will find that balance, that survival method, the adaptation skills. i can't not.

unless of course the big "M" word hits. do you think it will?

very much thankful,


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I can't say I've heard of this.

If you're feeling OK so far, just continue to be mindful of how you feel. Stay in touch with your doc. Mood chart. All that good stuff.

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