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InkBlot2771

Dealing with anger

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I live in a reasonably small town, am slightly eccentric and get gossiped about in town too much. The topics include yelling at an old boss for bullying the staff her response to which was to spread shit around town about me and my illness. I had people wiping their arse on their hand then on my food in a sandwich shop, people shouting abuse at me for walking down the street.

Now, this all happened a long time ago. However, I still have to deal with the repercussions of my actions at the time. No-one has still never heard my side of the story, or those that did just don't even seem to believe me. It makes me so angry any time I'm treated badly even all this time later. I want it to stop! I don't want to be angry because of someone else's short sightedness. I just want to be able to take it on the chin and move on with my life.

I guess my biggest issue with this is all the emotional pain I went through at the time. I've not yelled at anyone for a long time, but I'm overly worried that if I get angry - all be it for a good reason - then the same thing will happen and again, it will last for months/years.

I feel ostracised from society here. It isn't everyone that's against me, but the gossip has never left me. I went to a party last October and someone from the town that I live in walked in and shook everyone else's hand. He then went through tto the kitchen and asked my mate "What the hell is that freak doing here?" Or words to that effect. Now, I'd never even laid eyes on this guy in my life before that night.

I need to either let go of it or get rid of it another way, but the problems feels overwhelmingly large.

I want to go to parties, hang out with friends. But I just can't take the humiliation of having to deal with that gossip, or it tipping my emotional balance whenever the situation is dredged up from the past. This has happened a fwe times in the last few months, but most of the time I keep myself to myself and I HATE that. I miss company.

Ideas?

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WOW, first of all no wonder you're so angry! I can't say I blame you at all, don't those fuckers know how hurtful a statement like "what is the hell is the freak doing here?" is?? I'm angry for you!

these people aren't perfect themselves, and they everyone makes mistake. they need to seriously get over it.

i'd say aside from ignore them, and not giving them the benefit of knowing that their behavior bothers or upsets you is probably the best way to go. Don't even give these people the time of day, act like they don't matter, because they don't, and what they think of you is not going to influence how you think about yourself. try to be confident, and just live your life.

I wish i had more useful information, or could be more of help to you, i'm sorry that i'm not. hopefully some other people will respond to and give you some useful tips!

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Being gossiped about and not liked sucks. No question. But how do you know the problem these people are having is anything to do with whatever happened with your old boss, years ago?

In a small town, there's always a lot of gossip. If you're somewhat eccentric, a good bit of that gossip is likely to be about you, and might have nothing to do with the past.

Honestly, if you want to be eccentric, and left alone about it, you might want to consider living somewhere less small.

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I lived in a town of 100 people (that's after I moved off the farm in the middle of nowhere) and I was the subject of all kinds of gossip as a teenager. People at the bar talked about me, people at the church talked about me, people at the post office talked about me. And that's about all the "businesses" there were in town!

Now I live in a city of 2 million people, and not even my next door neighbor gives two shits about me. It's definitely taken that stress off me. Of course, I don't work - main reason being so incapacitated by paranoia that people were talking about me that I'd freak out and quit or lose my job.

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