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Do you tell?

  

54 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you tell people your diagnosis?

    • No, I never tell anyone but my doctor.
      1
    • I tell only my spouse/partner.
      3
    • I tell only my immediate family.
      4
    • I tell only my family and close friends.
      29
    • I tell anyone who asks, employer, friends, family, you name it.
      9
    • I tell anyone even if they don't ask.
      8


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Do you tell people that you're BP? I tell only my immediate family and of course my doctor. Never, ever do I tell my friends or any of my past employers.

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Guest Vapourware

I've told some family about my dx and some friends. However, there's been some situations - i.e. university - where I've been compelled to disclose my condition, so I can get accommodations. Generally though, I don't tell people of my dx. It's on a need-to-know basis, largely because of stigma and also because once the information is out there, you can't rescind it.

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Good rule of thumb. Never tell your employer. That always ends badly.. the only exception for me was when one of them had MI themselves. Otherwise - no.

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Good rule of thumb. Never tell your employer. That always ends badly.. the only exception for me was when one of them had MI themselves. Otherwise - no.

I second that. I took a calculated risk at work to try to get some help from management in dealing with a situation with a problem co-worker that ultimately led to me being assaulted at work. Once I told them about my Asperger's, I was treated as the one with the problem, and handed off to a new supervisor. Even if it's not a case of stigma, it can end up being viewed as a weakness and used against you. (The person who hit me got seven day's suspension with pay. Afterward, she described it to me as "a vacation." :brooding: )

On the other hand, if a person's condition is bad enough that it's time to apply for Disability, then it's time to lay it out there.

Cerberus

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On the other hand, if a person's condition is bad enough that it's time to apply for Disability, then it's time to lay it out there.

Yes, to HR though. Either through the company programs or FMLA. Your direct supervisor isn't supposed to know the details of the disability. I learned that when I gave my MI manager my FMLA paperwork. He wasn't supposed to see it. They'll still hold it against you, but you can always say it's physical and not MI - not the same stigma.

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I put friends and family but....I have to feel secure before. My family took a long time to accept my diagnosis and fought against my treatment even. My husband was the one who got me help and told them it had been his decision so they could talk to him about it. That took a lot of pressure off of me and I can talk with them in general. They can tell when I am having a tough time and tell me to take my chill pills.:brooding:

As far as friends..usually after they have known me for a while they can see that I am very inconsistent with my moods and I will not disclose right a way even though. I want to have them know me before I let them know for sure. I am high functioning I think.

At church I was very open about it just to have people be frustrated as they wanted to cast that demon out of me :lol: . The also discounted me for anything but being a prayer project.

From then on my pastor is told when it is time to take some leadership role..I must disqualify myself no matter what gifts or experience I may have as I can not maintain that kind of responsibility without destabilizing. His wife is told too..this is good and bad.

My current employer does not know. I have worked part time as a merchandiser for 4 years and don't see him often. I use a scanner so it is pretty easy. it isn't a bad job for someone bipolar.

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My sister, boyfriend, and very close friend of over 10 years are the only ones who know. I will probably rarely tell anyone else. Definitely not anyone else in my family! I don't even know how my parents would react. I would never tell my employer anything more than I have to.

Does anyone even put it on their medical history if they are seeing a different doctor (not psych-related)? I don't put anything on my med history even though I am on medication for Bipolar and PCOS. The fact the I'm bipolar is completely irrelevant to pretty much any doctor I see! And the PCOS thing- I know I don't actually have it so why does it matter? Most doctors don't give a shit anyway. They need meds for possible contraindications. If they need to know why I'm ON the meds they can ask and I'll talk.

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I have told employers in the past about my dx, but if I ever go back to work, I would be hesitant to admit to having BP II or anxiety.

:ninja:

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i went and told everyone.

i kind of had to do it because my illness was too obvious.

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At church I was very open about it just to have people be frustrated as they wanted to cast that demon out of me

Heavens. Not literally, I hope...?

Cerberus

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Guest Vapourware

At church I was very open about it just to have people be frustrated as they wanted to cast that demon out of me :lol: . The also discounted me for anything but being a prayer project.

Video or it didn't happen.

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It's weird... Sometimes I feel ashamed of it. People don't ask me, and really the people who are close to me already knew. Though, I feel that if someone asked me, I'd answer honestly.

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I tell most everyone that becomes a friend or someone I spend time with, ie work. It will probably bite me in the ass at some point.

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I think there are some good candidates out there for role models for bipolar... Unfortunately many of us aren't that successful lol...

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I've gone to support groups for those with MI and disclosed my symptoms there. I also disclose my MI to people I meet at the clinic I go to for people who are part of the same state SMI program that I'm a part of.

When co-workers of mine have disclosed issues of MI to me, I have disclosed my illness but not to the the same extent as I disclose to someone at a support group or my clinic. Once, a work friend told me about her depression and she said, "but I'm sure you wouldn't understand." I said, "believe me. I understand. I have bipolar disorder."

Another situation was when a different work friend was saying she thought she had OCD. I told her I had OCD and take medication for it that makes it a non-issue. i didn't tell her the medication also treats 25 other SMI symptoms and I only have OCD when I'm manic.

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i went and told everyone.

i kind of had to do it because my illness was too obvious.

^ This. Also, I don't think I need to hide something that is so much a part of my every day life. I would be watching everything I say. Frankly, it's kind of a relief to have an excuse for being so "eccentric" after years of people thinking I was a big old weirdo. Now they can just cluck their fucking stupid tongues and tell themselves "poor dear, she doesn't mean it, she mentally ill" if I tell them what I am thinking. Ha!

The only time I wish people didn't know is when I am in a state of high paranoia and hallucinating. It really sucks to be at the store and run into someone that Knows, because I know they can Tell that I am bugging out of my gourd. It makes holding my brains inside my head even harder.

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Do you tell people that you're BP? I tell only my immediate family and of course my doctor. Never, ever do I tell my friends or any of my past employers.

I tell everyone. But then as a dear friend put it, it is utterly obvious that I am "special."

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Was sort of kidding about the demons. But religious people are not more ignorant of mental illness than anyone else. When I have disclosed I think it could have been positive as I was able to educate them.

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I only tell a few friends my dx. I would definitely not tell my family.

But I have been caught hallucinating in front of acquaintances and also complete strangers, so they would kind of know there was a problem without me having to tell them. Plus this was before I knew anyway.

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