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Can anyone relate to these adhd-ish experiences?


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Hi... I don't know the best way to give you a background about me... but as I've said on my other posts, I have been depressed for some time, currently on Lexapro 10mg. My doctor said it is also possible that I have adhd. He didn't want to give me treatment on adhd yet, and it has not been officially diagnosed since the depression was really affecting me so much so he wanted to focus on that first.

The thing is... I really feel that I have adhd. So I'm wondering if any of you can relate to some of my experiences.

For example, I started reading two books at the same time... and then I succeeded in finishing one of them, after that I decided to read another book, then another... until I finished 2 out of 8 books, leaving me with 6 unfinished books up to now.

Also, and this is really weird - I wonder if any of you have experienced this - when I pray at night... I find myself daydreaming in the middle of my prayer... then I get shocked have to redirect my mind and tell myself.. okay back to prayer.

I am also a fan of sony ericsson phones - since you can change and customize appearances and settings, I have x10 mini pro - I can't seem to be satisfied with one theme or setting, I need to keep changing the themes and tones... that sometimes I mess up the system and have to reformat almost every two weeks. The wallpapers have to be live - moving, or I need to keep changing them. And this also goes for changing settings on other devices such as my laptop - my browser, messenger, etc.

Now this is a big one - and I don't know if it's just me or if it truly is an indication that I have adhd - I seem to keep changing my interests in life, same as with goals, ideals, etc. Looking back on my 5 years working experiences, I just noticed that the longest time I was employed by a company was 1yr and 3 months - I was in the process of getting promoted and it took longer than I expected so I decided to quit. Then, the rest was history - 5 months, 6 months, 3 months in a job... I always seem to keep changing what I want to do. First I wanted to be in the arts, then I wanted to become a trainer, which I did, and then I wanted to do business, and then real estate - my last job.. and now... honestly... I just don't know what I want or how I am ever going to accomplish anything. And when I feel like quitting, I need to do it as soon as possible. I do not adhere to two weeks notices for resignation, it's always immediate resignation - I always come up with an emergency or something like that so the company will let me... or I just disappear - AWOL. I also didn't finish college because of similar issues. I got lost in my extra-curricular activities that I couldn't retain my interest in my subjects and started being absent in class until I just decided I want to quit school.

Now... -current problem - the depression is lifting, or that's what I think at the least... and I made it a goal to look for jobs online until I get to see my pdoc next week. I cannot focus! There is a long list of jobs on different sites.. but I keep turning to other sites ie facebook, etc... until... I lose interest in trying to find another job.

There are a bunch of other things but can any of you relate to those? Could I really have adhd??

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Oh... I forgot... one more thing which also affected my last relationship resulting to a breakup - my ex boyfriend complained that I am so impulsive. That once I get an idea to do something, buy something, go somewhere, I need to do it now - that day. Or else I will get really upset and restless. I get too excited when I think of something to do.

Before the depression came - I was SO NOT a fan of sleep. I would sleep max 6 hours, get up early and immediately get fired up and have to do something. If there is nothing to do or nowhere to go, I would get really frustrated and upset.

I also like playing those reflexive pc games and I almost always perfect the scores because I like the way it gets fast-paced. And when I get addicted to a game, I have to finish it in a day or two. There were times when I would be absent from work because I wanted to finish the game, I would even miss meals. Is this what they say is hyperfocus?

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I also have possible ADD. We really can't diagnose you. You have to work with your doctor or therapist for that. However, I can say that the meds for ADD are not wonder drugs. I take 30 mg of Ritalin, and I still have trouble focusing. Though in my case, it's hard to tell if my trouble focusing is from ADD or from anxiety. I too am looking for work online, and I get distracted (often, by this site). The problem is that I have a lot of anxiety about looking for work, i.e. a lot riding on it. So I'm very anxious about it and tend to avoid it as much as possible. You should not discount anxiety as a possible reason for your inattention.

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Um. A lot of these sx seem more hypomanic to me, though the lack of focus might be indicative of.... something.

ADHD doesn't make people unrelialble necessarily, or sleep like 6 hrs a day.

IDK though, I'm not a doctor, ultimately you have to work this out with doc and see which meds/tx help you.

Anna

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi guys and thanks so much for your replies. I was finally able to meet with my pdoc again and I took some tests and we were able to confirm that I do have ADHD as I discussed with him my other experiences as well.

He put me on Concerta 18mg for a start, to be taken as needed or if I need to do something that requires attention.

I actually tried it today and it was great!!!

I was able to sit still and actually do the thing that I've been trying and failing to do for such a long time now - which is a very simple goal - which is to send in job applications and I got back to my Odesk account, updated my profile and applied to jobs.

Although I still found it hard to read through job descriptions with instructions that were a bit more complicated so I just decided I'd stay away from them for the mean time and stick to simple instructions. One thing I've noticed... it does seem to wear off by night time and it's night time here already and that's why I'm back to this site lol. I don't know if that's normal or if it means I might need a higher dose.

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No, your stims will wear off at night. That is normal. Concerta is slow release, but it will still wear off.

18 m.g. is the lowest possible dose. It may be that you need a slightly higher dose at some point, but starting low and going up if needed makes sense.

Anna

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