quit lexapro, now feeling anxious again

[serenitywhen]

Hi everyone, I stopped taking lexapro 10 days ago on my own, with few effects, but now all my old anxieties have returned.

The first few days off were wonderful.  I felt more motivated and excited about life's possibilities than I had in the 4 months I had taken lexapro (10 mg/day). No more apathy or feeling numb.  I threw myself into work and got started on a side project even.  I could dance along with music and get really into it, whereas before with lexapro it was like "whatever".

I did this without consulting my doctor.  I have a new boyfriend and wanted to avoid the sexual side effects, and I didn't want to be "blah" around him.  And the first few days felt so encouraging I felt I made the right decision.

But now I remember why I started the drug to begin with.  A generalized anxiety has crept back in, it's like a big squirrel is running around my head constantly.  I get sweaty palms just thinking of asking a question at a seminar.  I am constantly second-guessing myself and self-consicous in even simple conversations -- this all didn't happen when I was taking the drug.  My leg muscles are tense, I pee a lot, and I am impatient in traffic and drive more dangerously.

What I want to know --

1.  is there any way I can get away from the anxiety while still keeping my motivation and energy and full range of emotions?

2.  if i start taking lexapro again will it work the same way it did before?

3.  i had some hope that after a while on the SSRI my brain would "heal" and I wouldn't need it anymore.  Does this actually happen? or is this unrealistic to expect right now?  with the new relationship maybe I was trying to get too many things to happen at once.

Thanks everyone!

[gretl]

1.  is there any way I can get away from the anxiety while still keeping my motivation and energy and full range of emotions?

No doubt about it, this is one of the tougher issues when it comes to medicating bad anxiety.  But it can definitely be done.  I would ask your pdoc those exact words.

2.  if i start taking lexapro again will it work the same way it did before?

Impossible to say.  If I recall, an SSRI often doesn't work as well the second time around.  But I know that's not always the case.  I wouldn't expect to get anxiety relief without the dull feeling though.  Just because that's not the way the crazy universe works 

3.  i had some hope that after a while on the SSRI my brain would "heal" and I wouldn't need it anymore.  Does this actually happen?

It depends on how long you've been anxious, how much of it is/was situational, how long you were on the med, what lifestyle changes you've incorporated, and most especially, whether or not you were in also therapy for learning other ways to cope with anxiety.  While it's somewhat common for certain types of depression to "heal" after 6-12 months on a med, I suspect anxiety is a tougher nut to crack.

...with the new relationship maybe I was trying to get too many things to happen at once.

Yep, always a danger.  Even monumental good things are considered "stressors", you know. I'd say get back in with pdoc and find something that helps so you can enjoy this new relationship the way you're meant to!

[ConfusedCat]

1.  is there any way I can get away from the anxiety while still keeping my motivation and energy and full range of emotions?

No doubt about it, this is one of the tougher issues when it comes to medicating bad anxiety.  But it can definitely be done.  I would ask your pdoc those exact words.

Gretl you are the wonderful optimist! It is what we all deserve and should strive for but with GAD I have seldom seen it happen without some cost.  I do not know of any med used for GAD that does not come with side effects either mentally or physically.  The question is which side effects are acceptable

to YOU.

ssri's all have of the chance of zapping our energy and sex drive and dulling our emotions, benzo's pretty much only the energy (but there is that addiction concern) , buspar may be an option if you anxiety is not severe but it doesn't work for everyone and not if you need the big seratonin boost, the off label blood pressure meds, well... lower your blood pressure. Effexor may help but is mainly an ssri until much higher doses and has just as many side effects though eventually with the snri boost it could kick up the energy level, etc etc etc.

I guess I am just a realist and have never found anyone even when they LOVE their meds not admit to a trade off of some sort that they wish they did not have to live with.

It is possible serenity that there is another one that may be better for you.  I do hope you find it soon.

CC~

[serenitywhen]

Thanks Gretl and CC.  You're right, finding the right treatment takes some patience and I should be prepared to make some kind of tradeoff no matter what.  I'm going to give lots of exercise and introspection another week and if it still doesn't help, I'll go back to my doctor, and also bring CC's suggested list of drugs.  I'm sure she already knows all the options but having more information is always better.  Thanks again guys!

[ConfusedCat]

You are very welcome and I am so glad you took it in the spirit it was intended and not just think I was a huge downer. I know it is hard to accept what we must when we have anxiety issues, to be rid of our anxiety. I was frustrated for many years wishing it would not be so.

Im pretty ok with it again for now. I too just went through a little setback that brought me back to reality. Ugh.

I sincerely wish you the very best!

Keep us updated.

CC~

[gretl]

Gretl you are the wonderful optimist! It is what we all deserve and should strive for but with GAD I have seldom seen it happen without some cost.  I do not know of any med used for GAD that does not come with side effects either mentally or physically.  The question is which side effects are acceptable

to YOU.

Ugh, sorry ... wonderful optimists are annoying, aren't they?  <shudder>

I agree that very few meds that work well for a serious condition (not just MI-related) come without side effects.  All hail Jerod's side effects rant page!  But man oh man, there must be somebody out there besides me who found relief from anxiety without completely losing "motivation and energy and full range of emotions". ??

I'm sorry to hear about your setback CC; you're such an awesome source of support and info on these boards.  And hey -- you have your Pollyanna days too 

[ConfusedCat]

Ok ok you got me, I have my "Don't worry, be happy" days as well!

Of course the question is what in the hell did you take that quelled your anxiety and left you motivated and didn't kill your libido or your emotions?

Spill it.

CC~

[gretl]

Two words:  mood stabilizers.  Trileptal allowed the Lexapro and PRN Ativan to finally work properly.  The Lex does make me rather lethargic, I confess.  But not unbearably so.  Now that I'm in the process of switching to Lamictal, I feel more energy but I'm also having to rely on Ativan a bit more often.  I'm hoping that settles down, plus I hope to DC the Lex after getting fully onto it, since people say it does help with anxiety once you get to therapeutic doses.

(And hey, Serenity didn't say anything about libido!  That falls into the category of tolerable trade-off for me.  But I confess it's one reason I'm hoping to be able to DC the Lex.)

[ConfusedCat]

I did this without consulting my doctor.  I have a new boyfriend and wanted to avoid the sexual side effects, and I didn't want to be "blah" around him.  And the first few days felt so encouraging I felt I made the right decision.

Um yeah I think it was one of her main concerns, that little libido issue!

It does seem from my months here that mood stablizers can help anxiety for many people. It is too bad that GP's don't have a little more knowledge in this area

where they could be willing to try some out.  For some of us it is very hard to find a pdoc much less get an appointment that isn't months away, and that is if we have the resources to even do so. 

CC~

[gretl]

Oops, duh!  I guess I didn't read that as she was currently experiencing sexual side effects; just that she was worried about the possibility.  (Sorry, Serenity!!)

It does seem from my months here that mood stablizers can help anxiety for many people. It is too bad that GP's don't have a little more knowledge in this area where they could be willing to try some out.

I hear ya.  I sooo wish they'd be more open to trying them.  Then again, it might be that it works for me just because my problem ended up being bipolar.  Then again (again), I suspect many more people are on that spectrum than currently diagnosed.  But that's a whole 'nother rant I'm sure we've all seen or participated in elsewhere.

[serenitywhen]

Oops, duh!

[Starchic]

Gretl, off subject here but I see you are Bipolar 2, if I am reading that correct. I was told by one doc who saw me for like 20 minutes that I was bp2. She said if she didn't hear my brother was bp1 she would have never said I was bp2? I have only anxiety symptoms. All else have said anxiety disorders, panic disorder with agoraphobia, and some milder ocd, obsessive thinking etcs. Maybe GAD. What are your symptoms for bp2? IF you wouldn

[skidoo]

In answer to your questions:-

1) I don't know

2) it will prolly work as before, the good and unfortunatley the bad

3) yes my undersanding is for most people depression is episodic and the brain can heal (with the help of CBT and anti-d). I think most people who use anti-d only stay on them for a period, rather than forever. In my case I've been told I will prolly have to stay on them forever :-]

CBT and a psych are a good idea so you can work thru the depression or whatever is causing it.

It's pretty hard to keep something this significant from your boyfriend, and in my expreience most people are pretty understnading. You prolly need to find another combination of meds that works for you, which means seeing a good doc or pdoc.

I've tried all kinds of AD the last worst one was Avanza (hideous for me, ymmv), funnily enough I've only been on Lex for 2 weeks, and it appears to me that my libdo has increased (which means my lack of libido was prolly depression related der...) and also orgasms are actually better :-) funny old world. Also appetite is decreased another positive, can lose a few kilos.

Though I have to say that I'm a bit scared of meeting some guy and getting into bed and not being able to get it up, which would be kinda embarrassing, just have to hope he's the understanding type as well :-)

Also, I haven't expereiced tiredness or lethargy on Lex either, seems I might be lucky on this one. On Avanza I was extremely tired all the time.

good luck

Craig

[ConfusedCat]

Serenity my apologies again! For assuming you were a *she.

You just wrote so well and all~ (NOT that that is a only a female trait)

Ok nevermind now Im making an ass out of myself.

Anyway Im very glad you talked to your patner and he seems understanding.

Craig, good luck to you also!  If a low dose is helping your original symptoms and you feel well, then hold it there. I have gone back down to 10 mgs of paxil from 20 and am feeling much BETTER than when I am on 20. I needed the 20 to saturate my sytem but again, as I was for years before, 10 mgs is my sweet spot for maintanence. I was starting to not feel well and going back down did the trick.

I know that is the total opposite for most people but Ive always been a strange reactive to meds person. Sometimes less is much better in my blonde brain.

Gretl there are many times I think a tiny dose of SOME stablizer would probably just about make me perfect. Doc won't touch em so I would have to find a good pdoc and so far I haven't found a reference for a GOOD one around here.

Im doing pretty well so it isn't a big issue except that I think I would benefit. I do have BP1 in my immediate family.

CC~

[hollywoodfreaks]

I have gone back down to 10 mgs of paxil from 20 and am feeling much BETTER than when I am on 20. I needed the 20 to saturate my sytem but again, as I was for years before, 10 mgs is my sweet spot for maintanence. I was starting to not feel well and going back down did the trick.

CC~

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Do you have any idea, scientifically, why going down on the dose might make someone feel better?  I've heard of that before but it seems so strange and counterintuitive.

[gretl]

Ha ha, for the record I'm a guy.

LOL!  My bad.  And I'm usually so "PC" about assumptions of that nature.  Humpf.  I think it was the name that mislead me for some reason (BTW, there are a couple of women here with somewhat masculine usernames that finally gave in and put some kind of "I'm female dammit!" reference in their user messages!  Totally not suggesting you do that; I'm just rambling.  Need to have another cup of coffee...)

But now I've come clean to my partner, and the little light bulb went up over his head and he was like, "you should have told me earlier!"  He's okay with me now and has been supportive.

It sounds like you've got a cool guy there, and I'm glad everything's out in the open.  SSRI's have never left me anorgasmic; I just basically have even less interest in sex than I did before.  Just the way I'm wired I guess.  Once I get going, I almost always finish quite nicely.

Gretl, off subject here ... What are your symptoms for bp2? IF you wouldn

[gretl]

Do you have any idea, scientifically, why going down on the dose might make someone feel better?  I've heard of that before but it seems so strange and counterintuitive.

I THINK ... without going back and reading ... that SSRI's are somewhat indiscriminate about which serotonin receptors they grab.  And there are a few that get overly-sensitized by the meds, and for some people, higher doses increase the anxiety and agitation (as well as other side effects) which overwhelms the positive effect you're getting from it hitting the OTHER receptors.  Something like that.

[ConfusedCat]

Thanks Gretl I knew the theory behind it but I couldn't explain it!

>What she said.

CC~

[Starchic]

Ha ha, for the record I'm a guy.

Thanks,

I am taking proprnolol for heart condition (svt) and ativan as needed. AT 0.5mg, not very often because I'm usually scared to take: 0)

I'm not sure what I have , I'm suppose to be seeing a new psy doc soon, I think they get annoyed because I want answers, but how can they treat me if they are not sure what I have, or at least not in agreement...

The one who said I was bp2 said she would have never diagnosed me with that had not she knew my brother was? Also, she said my anxiety was

[THX1138]

I need a label too. I don't know if I'm ADHD, ADD, AADD, OCD, PTSD, GAD,  or what. I think I'll take a look into the DSM-IV http://allpsych.com/disorders/dsm.html  and find out what kind of label I need.......or better yet, I'll let the shrink test my chemical imbalance with that new machine they use, you know the one....the AWSOMO 4000.

Dang, I don't think my shrink has that technology yet, I'll have to have it checked the way it's always been done....GUESSWORK. You know, try this....well, that didn't do it, try this....dang! well how about this chemical, no that's not the one, hows about this one,........well, maybe they'll find the right chemical that my brain is lacking someday. Or better yet, they could make a drug and then create a disorder to sell the drug, that approach has been working for 50 something years now.

I think my SSRI gland is out of whack, or maybe my anti-psychotic drug gland isn't producing enough Seroquel, hmmm.....could it be my benzodiazepine gland isn't producing the correct amount of Xanax? Dang! God didn't make enough chemical glands in my body, I need the modern miracles created in the pharmaceutical labs.....yeah, that's the ticket!

Thanks Pfizer, Upjohn, Forest Pharmaceuticals, AstraZeneca, Roche, Lilly, Wyeth, Shire Pharmaceuticals, Bristol-Myers Squibb, Sepracor, GlaxoSmithCline, Novartis,......What would we do without all your wonderful drugs!! 

[ConfusedCat]

Did you have anything constructive to say in this thread?

I think your rant would be better received down in "The Healthcare System Sucks" board.

[Starchic]

THX1138, I don

[ConfusedCat]

Thinking clearly IS way better! I have to agree with that.

That might be easier for us to say, being *old* married people though.

CC~

[serenitywhen]

serenitywhen, How long have you been taking the lex?

[gretl]

Three cheers for SOOL!

Hip.Hip.Hooray!

Hip.Hip.Hooray!

Hip.Hip.Hooray!

Damn, girl, that's a keeper.  Well done.

[ConfusedCat]

You rock SOOL!

I guess he/she/they got their two rants off and left us to sit in awe of their genius?

And I am always so hopeful they are going to educate the world and free us from our miserable confines. Damn.

CC~

[StrungOutOnLife]

Three cheers for SOOL!

Hip.Hip.Hooray!

Hip.Hip.Hooray!

Hip.Hip.Hooray!

Damn, girl, that's a keeper.  Well done.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thank you! I damn near lost it to a "Page not found and don't think your back button's going to help you" thingy. If I hadn't copied and pasted it onto my User page at Wikipedia, I would have lost it again, just like I did this post about the non-genetic testing way of probing the functionality of one's metabolic enzymes.

[THX1138]

THX1138, I don

[gretl]

I think you're on the wrong site, dude.  This one is for people who have serious mental health problems and are looking for medication help.  You just had crappy doctors.  I hope your cancer scare turned out to be nothing.  Peace.

[ConfusedCat]

If you had found this site before your drug roller coaster you would have been better informed and able to make better decisions about the drugs they wanted you to take.

In other words Your EYES would have been open to the good and bad.

No one here advocates drugs are the panacea. They are a last resort in an overall health of the mind along with therapies. The people here know they are a tool and not THE answer.

Will some people be on drugs for life? Absolutely. Because their brains cannot function normally without them. Others may be able to go on drug free or at low maintenance doses, it all depends on the flavor of cooties!

Sadly stories like yours are heard all too often. That is much of why there is a site like this.

CC~

[THX1138]

I know you people don't like me but I'm trying to help you, believe or not.

Here's the truth about SSRIs, and here's a link to the source:  http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/516262

Advertisements for SSRIs May Be Misleading

Laurie Barclay, MD

Nov. 8, 2005

[ConfusedCat]

I think most of the points made by that article have been dissected and discussed here on these boards numerous times.

Most here advocate a combination approach to treating MI. Healthy lifetsyle, therapy, good Doctors, and meds if they are needed above and  beyond. Of course we also discuss the realistic expectations that can be given to the efficacy of meds by reading all studies published and articles such as the one you printed.

No one is denying the research or advocating for drugs. We are advocating for whatever support is needed after careful consideration and sharing our experiences in the hopes of helping others. There are good and bad even horrible experiences posted about here that is enough to scare anyone away from meds if that is what they want to focus on. When you have done all of the other things and still feel like you don't want to live it is time to gather support and try a med. With all of the information and anecdotes available here and easily found by searching or just asking I feel this site shares in one thing others do not. The truth.

We are not anti-anything or pro-anything. Except for truth gleaned from experience and research.

* Disclaimer* Of course I am not speaking for the entire site just my own opinion and what I have learned since being here.

So, what exactly are you trying to help us with that you think we do not know?

If you would like to start a thread about a specific topic or research or study or drug, please do so. I think you will find some very educated and useful information.

PS There are unmedicated people by choice who use these boards too. They also receive good support here.

CC~

I for one do not know anythign about you so would never judge that I did not like you or your information. I just think it would be more appropriate to start a thread with a specific purpose of either education or interest in the topic so you can get the feedback you may be wanting to discuss. 

If you would like to discuss efficacy of srri's then start that thread and let's do so.