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Drunk, tired and bored. I thought I'd try watching some online porn in an attempt to enliven myself. Sort of worked. Those are some nice wardrobes but you've painted the rest of the room a sort of aqu

Agnes, my five-ish lab/spaniel mix, has concluded that a rilly rilly helpful thing to do for her brother, who is nearly 17 and twenty+ arthritic pounds smaller than she, is to follow him as he labors

Quite a few women have said to me that women can be brutal to each other. Men might be more violent towards each other but women seem to go for psychological violence, which is far worse. I probably g

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I'm so sick of Facebook. Three people who happen to be relative post just Trump propaganda and religious nonsense. One makes six or seven posts a day so I always have to see this crap.

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I learned a new word today - Yonic. It was in reference to this perfume bottle, which should give a clue as to it's meaning.


I mean it does look a bit like a... lady's private dirty shameful bits. Or vagina if you prefer. Or clunge, minge, flange, beaver. You get the idea. It's the female version of Phallic, which is a fancy way of saying that something looks a bit like a cock. Something like this


That's a church. Either the architect wanted it to look like a wonky cock or he was a really shit architect. Yes he! Which isn't meant to sound sexist. Women can of course be architects but it's difficult to imagine a female architect building a giant wonky cock. I guess the pulpit is at the tip. Oh and there's a disgusting joke about the organ player which I won't repeat.

We've probably all heard something called phallic but how many of us have ever heard the word yonic? Let's redress that imbalance with some yonic images.




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Drunk, tired and bored. I thought I'd try watching some online porn in an attempt to enliven myself. Sort of worked. Those are some nice wardrobes but you've painted the rest of the room a sort of aqua colour? You've got some nice antique looking wardrobes there with a dark finish but I can't condone your colour scheme for the room. That shade of blue just clashes with the wardrobes. No, get your tits out of the way. Maybe an off white colour? Something like Ivory. She had some really nice wardrobes though.

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2 hours ago, jt07 said:

I wonder how many people will eat turkey today.

I told my parents that I was debating eating just sides and skipping the turkey part (it’s honestly my least favorite of the components), and they looked at me like I was growing a third ear. So now I’ve got to figure out whether to do it anyway.

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I was reading an article by a man who has an enormous penis and the problems it's caused him. We're talking a tripod here. Quality journalism from the Guardian! It took him years to have normal sex with his wife because he was trying to park a monster truck in a regular parking space (I thought using a euphemism would make it sound better but I think I've just made it sound much worse.) The poor guy. Yeah I felt no sympathy at all. At no point when I was reading it did I think "Well I'm glad that my penis isn't that big!" Oh yeah, being hung like an elephant sounds awful.

I think that men find their genitals far more fascinating than women do. Maybe that explains all the unwanted dick pics. They're just trying to share something that they find interesting with you, bless 'em. "Here's a picture I took of an Osprey, here's a picture of the Colosseum in Rome, and here's a picture of my penis." What? You don't like Ospreys? God I'm no expert on women and relationships, but besides any other problems with that do they really think it's going to work? Yes it was love at first sight. The moment he sent me a picture of his wrinkly scrotum I knew he was the one for me. Our love was written in the creases of his nut sack. I think I should probably shut up now.

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I think I might've found a new purpose in life. Trolling right wing dickheads. These people are frighteningly dumb and so certain of their stupid fucking opinions. There's a group called Make Britain Great Again on YouTube. Oh for fucks sake. Maybe I can influence them by being even dumber than they are. "You can use facts to prove anything but that doesn't make it true. Who can say for certain that the world is round and dinosaurs existed? But the liberal media forces these 'facts' on us and it's all fake news and disinformation." I think I'm in with these dumb fucks. Wish me luck.

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