Stace126 Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 Hello! I'm Stacy. I'm 27 and from Pittsburgh, PA. I'll try and keep this short and sweet: I've had anxiety for pretty much my entire life, and it waxes and wanes depending on my life situation. Right now it's rather high because I just started a new job, I'm buying a house, planning a wedding, AND trying to get my novel published. Anxiety and depression run on both sides of my family. Fun. Currently I take Buspar, which I like. I've taken Zoloft and Paxil and probably something else but I hated it. So Buspar it is. I've been to a few different therapists over the past 10-15 years, which have helped, but not "cured" me. I'm not seeing one right now because I don't have insurance and my schedule is crazy. Which is probably not the best thing in the world. Right now my biggest problems are self doubt and self loathing. There was a time in my life when I had SO much confidence, but that's slowly deteriorated into almost nothing. Although ... there are some days when I feel like I could conquer the world. Other days (most days) I feel like I'm too much of an incompetent idiot to fix myself a bowl of cereal. Sigh. The self doubt and second guessing myself is really causing problems with my relationships (friends, family, and fiance). And also at work. I feel like a little kid that has to come crying to my mommy everyday for reassurance. And while I used to be able to handle criticism, I feel like I can't anymore. I OBSESS over the tiniest comment and drive myself NUTS. Today at work, I got my first assignment from the CEO ... and I screwed up. I fixed it. But now I feel like a total dumbass and like he hates me and wants me fired. My supervisor said not to worry about it and that it wasn't entirely my fault but ... I have been having a panic attack since I left that place 4 hours ago! So .... there's me and my issues. Glad to have found this board! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueandgray Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 Stace, Welcome to CB. I am glad you found it. You'll find lots of information and encouragement here. You and I are a lot alike. I, too, obsess over mistakes I make, no matter how tiny, no matter if I fix them or not. Remember that you are deserving of all the happiness in the world, and congrats on all your recent and upcoming accomplishments!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miracle Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 Hi Stacy, I'm new here too and can relate to what you wrote. Have you every done any CBT? David Burns' book, FEELING GOOD, has some good techniques for "talking back" to that inner critic. Also, Neil Fiore's book, The NOW HABIT, has a neat approach to "worry more effectively." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olga Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 Hi, Stace. I'm glad you found us and I hope we can offer some support and encouragement. Please read the user agreement---it avoids problems later on. Let us know if you have any questions. olga Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlamelessCandle Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 Welcome to the board. I understand your panic at making a mistake on an assignment done for the CEO of the company. Please - and I know this is very hard - try to put this behiind you. I'll bet he/she (probably a he; just the odds - heh) has already forgotten about YOUR mistake and moved along to bigger things, bigger problems, maybe some other mistake that mattered more than yours. Trust me on that one; I worked in the corporate world for years, I will echo an earlier poster and say that CBT-type therapy seems like it might give you help and perspective. I hope you look into it. You do need to talk back to that inner critic. It's not easy; I'm still talking back and it's been decades. It does come and go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M@ri Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Hi Stace I'm brand new here, but I relate to what you wrote. It's all too hard to ignore your strengths and listen to that evil inner-critic. Unfortunately, I'm letting mine turn me into a hermit. Anyway, you are not alone. Keep on keepin' on and congratulations on your upcoming wedding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Emperor Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Hi, Stace! Sounds like you've got quite a lot going on right now! Welcome to CB! I hope you find what you're looking for here. It's a great place! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rowan77 Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Hello Stacey!! Welcome to crazyboards!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scatty Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Hi Stacy! We;come to CB! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hallowedink Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Welcome to CB! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stace126 Posted July 9, 2012 Author Share Posted July 9, 2012 Thanks for the welcome everyone! I will probably be visiting this board a lot. Just one question: What is CBT? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olga Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Many of our members with severe anxiety and other psychological issues have found CBT to be extremely useful in helping them to function day-to-day. We use a lot of abbreviations here and we should all remember that our new members might not be familiar with all these terms. To help you out, we put together a glossary that includes most of the common abbreviations---here's a link: http://www.crazyboards.org/forums/index.php/topic/848-glossary/ I hope that helps! olga Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feenix Posted July 29, 2012 Share Posted July 29, 2012 Hi Stace. Hi and welcome. I'm new here too, signed up yesterday. I relate a lot to some things you wrote -- feeling low self-worth and confidence but remembering times when that wasn't the case. Needing a lot of reassurance and perseverating on any small negative reactions from others. well, I'm describing my own stuff, don't mean to over-identify. But the things you describe resonate a lot. If I can stick around I hope I'll see more of you here. I like the quotes in your sig too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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