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Lexapro Mania

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So my pdoc added Lamictal to my lovely combo because I have been having horrible depression during my PMS week. I was taking 10 mg just during that week, and now he has me taking 20 mg all the time. At first I was full-blown manic, but I figured it was just me adjusting to the meds. I settled down some.

Then PMS week came, and WHO HOO!!!!!!  My mania lasted all week!!! It was great! I am an utradian cylcer, so my manias last mere hours rather than days, so having this sustained motivation or happiness or whatever was GREAT! Of course, I also lost all tact and was a little too blunt with my SO. I haven't been able to concentrate at work. I haven't paid my bills. Usually I feel anxious when this happens, so I end up doing it.

Now that is all gone. I just don't care! It's so much fun! I don't care that I am sucking at work. I don't care about my late charges and the phone calls. I don't care if my boyfriend dumps me! I have been staying up SO late and still do fine all the next day!  Oh, and I don't care what my house looks like. I am going to go clean it today because it does make me happy when it is clean, but I don't care if it isn't. Not like me. I am not the queen of the clean house, but if it is wildly messy, that causes anxiety, too. I know this is SO normal for non-rapid cyclers, and THAT is why they take meds. But I have never experienced this before.

This is probably going to turn out to be a bad thing. I did have a day of massive depression yesterday, and I cried for hours. But then I started going up again and it got better. Had I seen my pdoc yesterday, I would have told him that I can't handle anything anymore. My plate is too full, I just want to be done with it all. Life sucks and I just want to go away forever from it. I had suicidal thoughts, but I always have those. Unfortunately, I just can't leave my son to fend for himself. He has such a hard time in life and I know it would be horrible if he had to go live with his dad. SO, dammit, no suicide for me.


Here is my point. I like this. I don't want it to stop. I don't want to tell my pdoc that I am pretty much going off the deep end. When I am anxious-manic or depressed, I wanted to go back to normal. But now I so don't want to. Yeah, yeah, I should. I know that. I have thought about it. I even thought about faxing him a letter, because I don't trust myself to say it to his face. But I think, if I could JUST go through ONE MORE PMS week like I did this month.....

Okay, so normally I am really down on myself, my life really sucks, (that's not a figment of my imagination, it really does suck) and I have really low self-esteem. So it's not just when I am PMSing that I feel bad. But when I am PMSing, I hate myself even more than normal. I hate everyone and everything. I can't stand the way I look. My anxiety used to be hell, but the Xanax helps with that. Anyway, every month for 14 years, since I had my first kid. And getting a reprive from it was heaven last month. It was truly incredible.

So one other thing. If your life truly sucks, how happy are you supposed to be on anti-depressants? I mean, isn't there a point where you just have to realize your life sucks and if you are depressed about it, so be it? I mean, situational stuff is not a chemical imbalance.

Okay, done.


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Number one:  call your pdoc.  You KNOW this is a bad thing; re-read your own post several times if you need convincing!

Other people's posts to convince you

Some more

Number two:  once you get past THIS, LOL, call your pdoc again.  You definitely should not have to feel down on yourself all the time unless you're manic.  No wonder it's seductive!

So ... did you try 10mg of Lexapro month-long before jumping to 20?  What else is in your lovely combo, at what doses? 

If your life truly sucks, then no antidepressants aren't going to make you happy.  But they will give you the fortitude to grapple with the daily shit and keep on keepin' on.  They should give you enough psychic strength to continue trying to make your life NOT suck.  ("Situational stuff", if it goes on for very long, CAUSES a chemical imbalance.)

I'm off to send an email to the special ed teacher (the one I've spent all weekend composing. Eek!)  Hope your day is ... hmmm, not "better" ... maybe "stable-r"?!  Let us know...

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Thanks for responding. You are wise and very helpful.

Boy, talking about the psychosis, that was interesting. I have never experienced that.

When I first went in to the doc, I knew I needed help. He put me on Lexapro and I totally freaked out. Panic, crazy, yucky mania, just off the charts out of control. So I know that part was due to being on an SSRI without a mood stabilizer. Oh, my combo is 200mg Lamictal, 450mg Welbutrin, Xanax PR, and

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Did you fax it yet Sam?

I am so glad you realize that you are not in control and need to get help. Im sorry it feels so good and knowing you are asking someone to take away that good stuff must be the hardest thing in the world!

It is possible just lowering the dose will keep you on a more even keel and not rip the rug out from under you.  There are some people who can feel great on only 5 mgs of lex.

Hopefully your Doc will opt to try for a happy medium.

Best of Luck.


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Yup, I faxed it.


That was a really honest post. I wouldn't have been able to write like that had I had the intention of sending it to him.

Yeah, he might suggest for me to go on 10mg all the time and see how that goes. I just hope he doesn't change my mood stabilizer. I take Lamictal, and I love it. The sucky thing is, when he went up on that I had manic anxiety. So he took me off of that. Jerod even mentions on his Lamictal page that it stops working during PMS week. Sigh.

I am glad today that I was tired and able to sort of think straight. I am going up again, so I guess y'all just barely caught me!!!!

Thanks for your concern,


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I am going up again, so I guess y'all just barely caught me!!!!

I have this image of you ascending quickly in a hot air balloon like the Wizard of Oz, with a bunch of crazies falling over each other trying to grab the tow line!!!  hee hee hee


(Recognize those red earmuffs?)

I'm so glad you faxed him your post.  That was really brave.  I hope he doesn't try to change your mood stabilizer either; that seems way premature.  You might talk about dropping back on the Wellbutrin and leaving a bit of Lex on board.  Your Wellbutrin dose is pretty high; have you read NARS's posts lately about the Lamictal/Wellbutrin combination?  It's a pretty stimulating drug (stimulating in an energizing way, not always stimulating in a manic way) and is known for making anxiety worse.  Maybe if you dropped that down, you could even increase the Lamictal. ??  Also, I think I've read where people had trouble at certain intermediate doses of Lamictal, but instead of dropping back they forged ahead and felt much better at a higher dose.  I wonder if your pdoc has seen that kind of response in anyone.

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OMG I am laughing hysterically!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is incredible!!!! Earmuffs!!!!!!

My stomach hurts! That is going to be a classic for me!!!!!

Um, yeah, I my pdoc is this afternoon and I am nervous about what he is going to say. Back at the beginning I would write him how I was feeling when I felt I needed help because I just can't think of it at the time, so he is used to me writing. The fact that it wasn't to him makes it more raw. As much as I hated to do it, I did sort of feel brave.

I will check that post by Nars.

I was getting depressed a lot at 200mg Lamictal and 300mg Wellbutrin. We tried I think an addition of 50mg Lamictal, and it I ended up with a lot of anxiety. That is why he raised the Wellbutrin. Plus, raising Lamictal doesn't help my freaky PMS. My anxiety is so much better than it used to be. I don't have it regularly. I usually take the Xanax to calm down at night. I can feel the anxiety coming on, but then it's like the meds stop it.

So it seems like the Wellbutrin/Lamictal combo is working out well for Nars.I am just not sure where to go from here. My pdoc is really good at listening to me, and I hope that he will have time to have pondered my letter before he sees me.

Thanks so much for being there for me, you really helped. And I needed a good laugh this morning! You

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Normal? I don't know what that means!

It sounds alot like my day though I have never claimed to be normal.

I do think everyone has a body clock/rhythm with ups and downs, energy and tiredness during the day. I am certain that IS normal.  so unless you are going off the charts from one point <_____________________________________> to the next, instead of just like a wave along the line, I think you are ok.


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