BamaBrad Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 I'm a 31-year-old man, living in Idaho. I was diagnosed as clinically depressed in January after a suicide attempt. I've always been depressed and anxious, but an adverse effect from medication pushed me over the ledge. My depression worsened last year after suffering a spinal injury, which required surgery. I now have nerve damage in my left leg and chronic pain in my lower back. I am on percocet daily for the pain, and I walk with a cane for balance. My doctor placed me on citalopram for the depression, which made me delusional. I was imagining conversations that supposedly never took place, both at home and at work. Some of my coworkers, who I used to consider close friends, freaked out and went to management. One night in January, I had a psychotic break while out with these friends, which disturbed them. The next morning, I attempted suicide. I spent a week in a psychiatric ward, where I was placed on a new medication, venlafaxine. Less than a week after being released from the hospital, I was fired. I have filed a complaint of medical discrimination with the department of labor, and the state is in the middle of an investigation. So far, I haven't been able to find work, but I am on unemployment. It's not much, so I've had to sell my car and cut expenses drastically. My wife and I will have to sell our home. We'll likely have to move away, as I live in an area where the economy is mostly based on agriculture. I used to be a newspaper reporter. There isn't much use for someone like me here. My best option is to move away and find another line of work. I eventually heard voices again while on the venlafaxine, so I quit. I have taken nothing for the past few months, and I don't want to try new medications. I physically feel terrible while on them anyway. One doctor has suggested electroconvulsive therapy, but I'm not sure I can afford the treatment. In short, I'm pretty fucked up and barely functional most days. I just sit around the house, with nothing much to do. I've had no luck finding work, as many times a prospective employer has invited me for an in-person interview, only to rescind the offer. I'm sure I'm being blackballed by my former employer, as means of retaliation for filing a complaint with the labor department. Otherwise, I've lost all interest in favored activities, and I struggle to see a point to trying to jump start my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.