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Hello guys and gals,

 

Well, as you may somewhat recognise by the the title of this post, is that I have a friend who cuts his face, let alone the self injuries on his right arm.

 

He had been cutting, his right arm, for weeks on end, usually once a week, which I thought was bad enough, but had negatively progressed to cutting his face.

 

I am worried about him, as first, I believe this is not healthy for his mental state, and second, it is not socially acceptable in the workplace. I can give you many other factors, but I would hate to bore you guys.

 

In short, I am very worried about him, and was wondering if this facial cutting would ever stop? It is very noticeable whenever I see him at work  - I was the one who helped him get the job too - only because I've known him ever since we were young - a childhood friend.

 

This young man who is now 28, has always been shy, reclusive, anti social, and almost everything from a to z, but he still is a beautiful human being and my good friend.

 

I could never see myself doing this. Firstly because I am adopted, so I could never take a part of my life, and "cut it" emotionally, I have a daughter - she doesnt need to see that, also because physically, it would hurt me too much to go through that pain, and finally, I already have scars on my face from when I was 2 or three - don't ask why, because I was adopted, so I don't know what happened - that is my own journey that I have to figure out myself.

 

I just hope one day he "snaps" out of it, and comes to his senses. I have offered him support, asking him to see a psychologist, and just being there for him to talk to him - just being a friend, but I can't hold his hand, he is a grown man. I mean, I understand I need the help, so I understand that I need to take pro active actions towards getting the help. I think, he knows that too, but his personality has always been to "ignore" the issues at hand. It does't mean he's a bad person, just he doesnt want to put in the effort.

 

Anyways, thanks for you guys and gals for listening, I don't have many friends myself, but I take emotional hurdles differently now that I am a full time time parent, significant other and full time student.

 

Any insight to this face cutting would be great, so I can get a better understanding.

 

Cheers,

 

Alejandro M.

 

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Hey -

Unfortunately, this is a first person site, so we don't really have the resources to help friends and family - it's not because we don't respect that you are struggling, but it's just not what we do. You could consider trying a site like NAMI that has portions for friends and supporters.

It sounds like you have done the right things by supporting and recommending professional help. Sometimes that is all you can do.

Feel free to tell your friend that he can come here himself and discuss his struggles with us and we will be glad to support him. If you have mental health issues of your own, you are also welcome to post about those.

Tryp (SI moderator)

Edited by Wooster
corrected "third person" to "first person"
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Hi, Alejandro.

We're a first person site. That means, if your friend is looking for support, your friend is free to post here. You could even recommend us to him.

However, it also means that you can't get good answers here about your friend. Maybe NAMI can provide you with more answers and support.

Take care of yourself. It'll be hard to help your friend, otherwise.

Rosie

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