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So, I would like some advice/thoughts on this


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On Sunday evening I was very tired and, while I remember being a bit down and that I wrote a blog post, I don't really remember anything else. Reading back what I posted, I was clearly having a lot of suicidal thoughts and generally not in a good place. And feeling like my family weren't real people apparently. I haven't dissociated or felt suicidal since then.

 

I haven't talked to a doctor or therapist about it but I think I've experienced a fair amount of dissociation before, more than the usual daydreaming that everyone does. I've always just considered it to be that weird thing that sometimes happens when I get very stressed by something and not really a big deal. I am a bit alarmed by the blog post though because 1. I must have been in a pretty bad way and wouldn't have known now if I hadn't written it down and 2. suicidal thoughts + feeling like stuff isn't real sounds potentially kind of dangerous?

 

I don't know what to make of it really. 

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Anxiety and depression can both cause dissociation.

It is a symptom worth mentioning to your care team, especially if you become more dissociative or start to put yourself into unsafe situations. That includes planning. So, yes, you should bring this up. There are ways to lessen dissociation's hold on you, either by managing the depression and/or anxiety, or using grounding techniques on the dissociation itself.

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I understand why you would find that experience alarming.  Dissociation can be frightening.  I am glad to hear, though, that things have been better since Sunday night.

 

I would definitely bring it up with your pdoc/tdoc at your next appointment.  Your treatment providers can help you come up with grounding techniques to help you remain or come back into the present moment. 

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Thank you for your replies. I think grounding techniques would probably be helpful. And it looks like the depression could really be managed better, which isn't very encouraging (I'd thought I was getting a handle on it lately). 

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