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Ugh! Okay, I'm freaking out a bit because, well, I'm really worried that I'm pregnant. Thing is, I've had a copper IUD for five years. The strings are still there, I literally checked for them five minutes ago.


Took a pregnancy test a few days ago, it was negative. Though, I'd been drinking LOTS of coffee, so I am certain that the piss was probably really, really diluted, which could certainly cause a false negative, I suppose.


My last period started around April 12th or something, I don't really remember. It seems like it's been a while and I've been lazy and not keeping track. The chance that I had a period after that date is very slim. . . but my memory is absolutely HORRIBLE and I don't track my periods much.


The last one was late though. . . two weeks. I do remember that. I started a diet and every time that I do that, it's late. 


But,  then I kind of stopped eating so little and I think it would have returned, as per my knowledge of diets and my periods. One time, I went OFF a diet and had three fucking periods in a two and a half month time frame. So. . . ? 


But yeah, we're going on two months here (very most likely) and I'm freaking out.


I've got a LOT of the pregnancy symptoms that I've read up on. It seems all but a couple of them. I'm not getting sick, anyway. 


Sigh. What the hell should I do? I guess take the other pregnancy test later in the evening when I've not had too much coffee, or first thing tomorrow morning, if I can wait. 


Panic attack central over here. Can't afford another kid, not sure that I WANT another kid. Would most likely be keeping one if I had it, seeing that I don't think I could abort knowing SO's stance on that and my own wobbly one (just for me, I don't judge other people who do that at all). Couldn't have a baby and give it away. . . I'm really ahead of myself here. That's being crazy for you! 


I'm thinking to just call the doctor and see if I can get in tomorrow morning for it, really. I'm really freaking out. Should I call the doctor? 


Aren't chances pretty slim that I'm pregnant, you know, with the IUD and all? I read statistics on it, yet on random forums and shit, there are tons of women who have been pregnant with a copper IUD in place. Shit! 


I mean, they can do a blood test at the doctor, right? That wouldn't show a false negative?


I smoke, I take LITHIUM, which is bad. I drank a bunch over the weekend because I got the negative result and just now realized that it may have been false.


And seriously, almost two months without a period when they are usually VERY regular? What the fuck?


Has this ever happened to anyone else? SUPER late period, but not pregnant? I'd like to hear those stories so I can calm the hell down and function properly. 


Or horror stories. That's fine too. Just, should I call the doctor and see if I can get in soon to see? The lithium thing has me really worried. I didn't take it the past couple of nights, actually. Sigh. Just in case, you know? I know that's dumb, but. . .ugh. 



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Ugh. I did try and make an appointment but my doctor isn't in this week and I guess I can't see another one or something so I'll have to wait until next week to see her/him whoever, they rotate because it's a residency program. I've given up recalling the name of the last doctor I've seen.


Nurse was really certain that I'm not pregnant because of the IUD, then I told her I was on lithium and she tried to get me in today, but I can't do it today because I don't have a ride, doctor is only there today, psh. Then when I told her that I'd call back next week for an appointment then if I thought I needed it, she hung up on me! So that fucking pissed me off. I should have gotten her name. That was rude as hell. I was being nice! 


Whatever. I'm really panicky. Kid's trying to communicate with me and I am struggling to do that. 


Maybe I should just call back scheduling and see if they can get me in with any doctor at all tomorrow? I don't know, maybe a possible pregnancy isn't really that important and they won't get me in. huh. What a bitch though, seriously.

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I wish I could do that. Kid's home for the summer so she's with me, no one to watch her and she'd flip if I took her to an appointment with me and they told me that I was pregnant. That wouldn't be something I'd want to disclose to her for a long, long time. 


Guess I'll just have to wait, freak out in the meantime, have lots of fun doing that. Blah. Sucks. 


I can't believe that they wouldn't take a pregnancy concern from a woman with an IUD seriously. Ectopic pregnancies are common enough in that scenario and can be really dangerous if not taken care of! Jeez. 


Eh, just bitching about the stupid nurse on the phone. Why they wouldn't get me in soon, I do not know. 


I don't know much about medicine, but sometimes I feel like even I have more freaking knowledge about certain things than the medical professionals that I speak with on occasion. 


Frustrated. Maybe I'll start my period in an hour. I'll just hope for that. Hell.

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. Why they wouldn't get me in soon, I do not know.


 Did they not offer you an appointment for today? I may have misunderstood, but a same day appointment seems to me to be "concerned" and appropriate.


I understand that you have childcare and transportation difficulties, but you cannot blame that on the nurse.


...and she tried to get me in today, but I can't do it today because I don't have a ride, doctor is only there today, psh.


I understand that I am being less than sympathetic, because I am. If you are concerned you do what needs to be done TODAY.

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Nah, it's fine. I couldn't do it today, and there have been times in the past when. . . I'd say every time that I needed an appointment at a different time, different day, whatever, well they would get me in shortly. Yes, she offered the appointment today. Even if I could drive myself there, I don't have someone to watch my daughter who has on multiple occasions out of the blue, begged me not to have another child. She freaks out to a degree that I can't understand and I can't get her to understand that this PROBABLY won't happen.


Point being, if she went to the appointment with me, she's only five. She'd have to be with me the whole time. IF, small if, they had to tell me that I actually had a positive result, I think my kid would know what was going on and would flip out. I just can't imagine getting news like that (which at this point, would be devastating and pretty difficult to handle) and then having to deal with a kid who can't understand what's going on screaming and crying and freaking out in an office full of people and probably for hours after we return home. I'd lose it. It's taking all I've got to hang on to sanity and speak with clarity NOW. I couldn't do that. Could not deal with that.


I'm very concerned, and it sucks, but I think the better thing to do would be to wait until tomorrow maybe when she wouldn't have to hear about it. That would be something I'd have to wait many months to tell her and that wouldn't make it much better, but at least I'd have time to adjust to the news so that I could handle the outburst or whatever more rationally.


So, I don't know if that makes sense? I don't want to put US through crap just in case. She needs me to be there, I'll put my health on hold another day or so hoping that my girl doesn't have to find out the wrong way, if it were the case. I'd go today if I COULD. I can't. 


This is no excuse. It's a reason. I'm freaking the hell out and it would be nice to figure out what's going on, but she's just a little kid and she doesn't get these things and it just wouldn't work for either of us.


Today is just today. I'm not going to die, I'll live. I'll suffer, but I'll live.

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Shit. Probably should have updated this yesterday. I don't know, I sometimes don't like it when people don't update shit, so whatever.


Was going to call yesterday to get into ANY doctor, but shortly after I woke up it seemed like I started my period (this isn't and hasn't been black and white for me for like a year, it's really strange and kinda hard to explain) and any other month I would have figured that I had, so I waited to be sure and I think I'm pretty certain at this point, anyway. I mean, yeah, I think so.


That sucks because I totally stopped counting calories for my diet, which was VERY important to me just hoping that by doing so, I would hopefully get my damn period. I don't know if that's why I did or not so. . . whatever. Funny how I'll not care one bit about weight gain if I need to KNOW something. That's stupid. 


So it may have been the diet, I don't know. Whatever. 


Looks like I'm not pregnant. I should probably stop reading horror stories on the internet and gaining weight because I've done so. It seemed legit though. Well, glad that's probably over. I may not believe it until day 5 of the period, but whatever.

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A bleed is not a sure sign that you're not pregnant. If you are relying on an IUD (as am I) and you aren't also using condoms and you have had a positive test, you need to get that checked out. IUDs can lead to ectopic pregnancies, where the pregnancy is in your fallopian tubes, which then burst and you can require surgery/die. IUDs are very effective, but not 100%. If getting pregnant is a big issue, then maybe try using condoms too, because it's not worth an unplanned pregnancy or an ectopic pregnancy, which can kill you and end the pregnancy.


If you aren't financally and practically able to get yourself to a doctor (or slim in a healthy way, because cutting off a period is a sign of starvation, healthy slimming doesn't stop a period) then please take care of your contraception.

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I didn't have a positive test. Two were negative. Out of two. 


Diet was relatively healthy for the past month and I'm so far from slim I could cry. 


I was worried about the ectopic pregnancy as well. Pretty sure it's my period. I spotted off and on for the past two weeks (yeah, that's unusual) but it wasn't like a period. Which made me think pregnancy as well. However, I think I'm good. Monitoring it and all that. Seems like exactly what happens when I do get a period. I'm just scared that it's not, which is dumb because it totally appears to be. I'm just weird, I guess. It's not spotting. 


If it's like, way more than normal or something, I'd go to the whatever, quick care or ER or something. Probably ER because they would take my insurance.


Trying to get SO to get snipped at this point, but he doesn't have the money. Uh, it doesn't like, work with condoms if you know what I mean. 


I might try and track ovulation at this point or something, but that's going to be difficult with what is now an irregular period, maybe? Right? I've heard that doing NFP (though it wouldn't be exactly that because of the IUD) isn't as effective or something without the regular period.


Shit. I don't know what to do if a negative pregnancy test doesn't even convince me. TWO didn't convince me.

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You have my support during this oh so stressful time. Please don't think you are dumb, you are not. As a woman I think it a natural thing to question pregnancy whenever our bodies experience even the slightest changes. Be gentle on yourself, don't beat yourself up for not knowing your body as well as you *think* you should. 

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You have my support during this oh so stressful time. Please don't think you are dumb, you are not. As a woman I think it a natural thing to question pregnancy whenever our bodies experience even the slightest changes. Be gentle on yourself, don't beat yourself up for not knowing your body as well as you *think* you should. 


Thank you. I really wanted to feel stupid, then it meant I was wrong and not pregnant! So, cool! It was just all the crap I read about women getting false negatives with the IUD on HPTs and I flipped out. Now I'm sure I'm DEFINITELY not pregnant, which is wonderful. I'm going to start tracking everything again. Sleep, mood, period, whatever. Fell off that wagon about a year ago. I realize now and then how useful these things can be.

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