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Does anyone else have hallucinations that sing at them?


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I do. They latch onto my words and do almost a stream of consciousness thing, and it's not me 'thinking' the lyrics. They sing them at me. the voices feel to me like they're coming from two people I know, but one of them sings perfectly in my head and in real life couldn't hold a tune in a bucket.

 

Anyone else have singing hallucinations?

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Do you mean like if you are hearing/listening to music, you can interpret "people" communicating with you somehow?  The "people" latch on to what I am thinking and start conversations with me in my mind about any little thought that crosses my mind.

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Yes and no, I've thought that the radio/tv is sending me messages through music etc before but now if I get a tune in my head. my hallucinations sing it to me, I know that sounds so bizarre. I try to stop myself from thinking of the lyrics that come next but I can't and then they tell me off for 'feeding the hallucinations'.

 

They do latch onto any thoughts like you describe though, any tiny little thing that I maybe wasn't even consciously aware I was mentally processing, and start questioning me about it..

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They do latch onto any thoughts like you describe though, any tiny little thing that I maybe wasn't even consciously aware I was mentally processing, and start questioning me about it..

 

Yeah, I hate this so much!  Exactly what I go through also.

 

I get songs stuck in my head but I hear them mainly as echoes.  The hallucinations don't sing anything to me.  That must be frustrating!

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Yeah, I recognise what you describe. My current diagnosis is bipolar and last time I saw the psychiatrist she put my experiences down to mostly anxiety, which wasn't helpful, because, well here I am two months down the line still thinking that someone I know is reading/causing my thoughts, and that I'm not ill, I'm sane and just have people controlling me from a distance somehow.

 

The singing isn't so bad now, when I was first ill it bothered me a lot the content of some of the songs, but now the songs are probably better than the voices because they're just songs and fell less 'targeted' than what the voices say.

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Added a sig with them in it. Interesting that you're on methimazole, gotta be careful with that as if they give you too much it can (unintentionally, I know sometimes they do that deliberately) knock out your thyroid function permanently, they didn't intend to do that with me, but I moved house, didn't sign up with a doc right away and ended up getting more and more tired til I eventually went to see one with my body shutting down and needed to be checked for hypothermia mid-summer.

 

I've really got to go back and tell the psych that my meds just aren't working for me, I'm scared because they're good drugs for a lot of people and I'm scared she's going to think I'm somehow making it up because my symptoms feel so bizarre to me. I feel like I'm sane, I've just got people talking to me in my head via long-distance something-or-the-other that I don't understand yet.

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This is how far I've got so far with the letter I want to send her:

 

I am still having big problems with hallucinations, they’re there all the time from the moment I wake up to as I try to sleep. They back off a bit when I’m reading something or watching my course videos, but that’s as near as I get to some respite and I can’t do things requiring that level of concentration all the time.

 

I am having a hard time maintaining insight and remembering that these are just hallucinations and not my cousin, I find it difficult to really believe that I’m not being remotely controlled through hypnotism and NLP. I am very close to my cousin and it’s hard thinking that she might do a thing like this and also hard to think that she is not doing this and I’m *still* hallucinating. I can ‘think’ that it can’t be them, but that’s not how I ‘feel’. I feel like I am being constantly being monitored via my computer, kindle, phone, despite having none of those with me at the supermarket that didn’t have the batteries out in my bag and *still* heard voices which is why I think that I’m probably being controlled through a sort of trance state

 

I’m scared that you’ll dismiss this as just anxiety, laugh off my symptoms as ridiculous, or think that because I’m intelligent I must know this isn’t real. It’s been going on for so long now and I really want it to stop. I wanted to write to you about it so that I don’t get stuck and frustrated trying to explain it all to you in one fifteen minute slot.

 

Experiences I’m having:

*sensations of pain/numbness, skin crawling or rippling and physical tics/twitches/blinking/grinding teeth

- I’m aware of how weird this sounds but it’s as if they’re actually touching my body.

*songs going round and round and even repetition within a song, even religious songs I haven’t heard since I was a child.

- Important to note that whilst my cousin can sing, her husband is tone deaf, yet in my head he’s more in tune than she is.

- It sounds like I’m actually being played snippets of songs in my head as if they’re using itunes and can only play a bit of the song without downloading it.

*telling me to shut up, that they’ll go if I just stop talking to them

*them telling me they’re teaching me

- ‘do you really think you did all this yourself?’

- Hard for me not to think they’re real because I have taken a number of positive steps in my life by doing a short course online, starting to read books again etc.

*them trying to convince me constantly that they’re not a hallucination

-’could we do this, or this, or this if we were a hallucination’

*telling me I have to do things their way, do what they want

- commands - sit up, do this now

*telling me that they’re on the phone to members of my friends and family, you or the gp.

- sounds like the person they say they’re speaking to is speaking to me in my head via some sort of bizarre setup

* can hear my own voice in my head sometimes as I’m saying things to them, and sometimes they ‘play back’ things they’ve recorded me saying to them in my head

*use different voices - exes, partners, gp, you, parents, sister, old school friend

*makes me paranoid and scared about talking to the people they impersonate

* makes me worry that they know what other people are thinking too, that they’ve ‘tapped’ the thoughts of other people I know.

*’we need ultimate deniability, you can’t tell anyone about this or we’ll get in trouble when other people find out how to do this’

- tell me I can’t speak to anyone about any of this

*have a sort of rapid fire mode I call the furies where they interrogate me in a horrible screechy sounding voice

*’you can’t withhold your thoughts from us’

*’don’t speak out loud in your head’

-’yes you already said that’

*fade out and then fade back in again

*’you could find out how we did this if you tried’

-’if you just look at this you’ll see we’re not just voices in your head’

- ‘as a sign of good faith’

*’do X and we’ll go’

*’I hate you’

*’I’ve gone off you’

*’you’ll be stuck with the machine/in the labyrinth forever’

- they have a testing program they call the Labyrinth, in which I’m asked questions and have to prove myself. When they let me out of the labyrinth it’s into a holding cell for them to observe my behaviour - basically it’s just one testing setup after another after another.

*’you know you’re doing the wrong thing don’t you Lenny’

*’what does X really mean to you Lenny?’

*’you’re testing us aren’t you Lenny?’

*’we know you, that’s how we’re doing this’

*feeling like the EMG testing with needles inserted into my muscles making sharp pin like feelings and muscle cramps/twitches

*thinking that anything my cousin says and sometimes what she doesn’t respond to is a secret message"

 

I feel really bad about posting this, trying to remember they're just symptoms and they won't get anyone into trouble.

 
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I think it is a great idea to write a letter!  It sums everything up and like you said it helps to not forget something, especially when you only have 15 minutes.  What you wrote really sums up everything well and well-written IMO.  I have a hard time expressing myself in words sometimes, and a lot of what you've written sums up things for me that I haven;t been able to express.  Thank you for that! 

 

And yes, they are symptoms, but for me they did get me into trouble at times because I believed them and almost everything they "said/did" to me I physically acted on.  I'm glad they haven't gotten you into trouble.  I know how hard it is to keep all these thoughts/voices inside, at the same time remembering it isn't real.  I'm glad you have been able to do that and not act on them.

 

Are you going to give the letter to her beforehand or read it to her when you see her?  Before you give it to her (if you do), I'd make a copy of it.  Just to have on hand.  Also it helps me remember what we talked about if I want to re-play it in my head.  With the copy of it I don't obsess and wrack my brain trying to remember what we talked about.

 

About the thyroid med ... I get my TSH levels done so frequently that if it goes out of whack it is caught pretty much right away.

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I made a big long reply, and then my cat landed on my keyboard.

 

I'm glad my letter helped you, I'm intending to post it to her, and yes you're definitely right, I need to take a copy of my own with me, so if there's a phrase that's ambiguous or something I can clarify. Will get a friend to come with me to the post box on Wednesday, it's not far at all, but it helps to have someone with me outside.

 

Before xmas the things I did because of the hallucinations got me in a lot of trouble, now they're mostly asking to do things mentally to make me resistant to hallucinations, like repeating lots of times things I say 'out loud' in my head (though then they'll say 'you can't withold your thoughts from us'), or by somehow triggering feelings like someone is sticking pins in me.

 

It is hard holding it all inside and a lot of the time it's easier to believe that I'm sane and my cousin is just making me more psychologically robust, than it is to believe that I'm pretty mentally ill right now.

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I have agoraphobia also.  Fortunately I am doing ok (usually) now and can get out on my own.  It sucks when I can't even walk 10 seconds total to and from to get my mail.

 

Same here with the mental stuff and the hallucinations.  I have learned to hold it all in too, and you're right, it is hard.  I used to "take notes" of my thoughts and "games" that "we" all played (we = the voices -- there were 100s), but then got paranoid someone would find them so I shredded everything.  I only did that at the beginning though because my mind was so active.

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I was going to make an attempt to go to the 'local' hearing voices group today, but the return journey by taxi (my current only copeable form of transport) was going to cost a minimum of £44 if there was no traffic and waiting time, which is 67.92 USD. Too much. 

 

Posted the letter last night, my friend walked me to the post box and back with only a minor wobble thinking I'd been photographed, at least the psych appointment is only on Tuesday and she'll have the letter, hopefully, I'll print her out a spare in case it somehow doesn't get to her in time. It ran to 3 pages in the end. 

 

If she says it's just anxiety this time I'll ask for a second opinion.

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I have hallucinations that sing. It's like there's an iPod playing somewhere and I can't find it to turn it off. The thing is that usually they're not even real songs, it's like someone is turning my thoughts into music and transmitting it back to me.

I do sometimes here real music, almost like I can hear a radio station in my mind, it makes it very hard to concentrate on certain tasks while at work.

I think it's a good idea to ask for a 2nd opinion if your doctor still says it's anxiety, it doesn't sound like anxiety to me and it's well within your rights to get another opinion if you're not happy with what your doctor tells you.

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I occasionally have "good" hallucinations (often in the guise of movie/ tv characters, they talk to me, are pretty friendly at first, except towards the end they start telling me my husband is poisoning me etc), and one more memorable ones was Fargo from Eureka singing "Unchained Melody" to me. That kind of wacky stuff is the only thing i like about this illness, if im honest. And is also one of the first things my medication takes out :(

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So I'm not the only one. Phew. It really does help to know I'm not alone. I'd been sent to a psychotherapist for my gender dysphoria, and he laughed at me when I said they sometimes sang to me. He also said I could ask to go back when I thought I was ready and then cc'd me in a letter to the psychiatrist saying he wanted me to be free of my psychotic features for a year before going back to him, so I'm not inclined to think highly of what he says.

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Yeah, I need to mention that to the psych, because saying 'you're too ill for me so no therapy for you' although I understand he doesn't want to dredge the depths whilst I'm struggling with muddy waters as it is, means that the only option open to the psychiatrist is meds and me going to the hearing voices group which is weekly and £44/$67 return trip by taxi.

 

His response further didn't help me because I took him seriously and believed that it must be by cousin in my head because he'd said that he'd never heard of ones that sing.

 

I'm going to point out to her that though I haven't made it to the hearing voices group I am seeking peer support online (hi!) and trying to do an online course to keep my brain busy.

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I have hallucinations that sing. It's like there's an iPod playing somewhere and I can't find it to turn it off. The thing is that usually they're not even real songs, it's like someone is turning my thoughts into music and transmitting it back to me.

I do sometimes here real music, almost like I can hear a radio station in my mind, it makes it very hard to concentrate on certain tasks while at work.

I think it's a good idea to ask for a 2nd opinion if your doctor still says it's anxiety, it doesn't sound like anxiety to me and it's well within your rights to get another opinion if you're not happy with what your doctor tells you.

 

This happens to me, too. I also hear these weird chime/bell things. It's something musical, but it's no instrument I've ever heard in real life. Although I wish somebody would invent them, because it's an awfully pretty sound that I miss when my meds are working properly (which they aren't at the moment).

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I remarked in response to the questions my psychiatrist was asking, "You never mentioned if I have had any positive hallucinations."

He replied with a seemingly confused disposition, then said, "I guess not. No one has ever mentioned positive hallucinations... So what are they?"

I explained that, since childhood, I have been able to hear music when it is not physically playing, as well as differentiating the various instruments and percussion.  This has contributed to hundreds of songs.

 

Unfortunately, around age six I saw and heard the devil quite vividly dancing in a jester's costume, in red, playing visible notes, in red. To say the very least I slept in my parents' bed that night.

 

Overall positive though!

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